My guy and i are in our early thirties and i opened up with him about some emotional baggage i have been carrying since fifthteen yrs. old. He opened up about his, but i felt he became a little distant with me when i shared mine. did i mess up??? Should i have allowed him to believe i had no problems and everything was ok? what do you think i did to our relationship?
2006-10-24 16:24:45 · 12 answers · asked by precious girl 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think your relationship has changed with him. What you do from this point will determine if it's for the better or worse.
I suggest that you make time to talk about it at a level that you two are comfortable with. Talk about how each of you has processed the information you shared. The more open you are about talking with each other, the deeper your connection is going to be with each other.
I believe that he backed off just so he can process what he has learned. When the time is appropriate, you two will be able to talk about all you shared. Just trust your senses in how far you two will go.
I think it's great that you both did this and I hope that you both grow from that sharing of information.
2006-10-24 16:33:39 · answer #1 · answered by Red1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did nothing to your relationship besides be open and truthful, and those are positive things. I am a 23 year old guy. I like it when a woman opens up to me emotionally because it tells me she feels comfortable enought with me to share her thoughts and feelings. Don't read into things like "I felt he became a little distant with me when I shared mine". It can a person nuts! Maybe he was relating to what you were saying. If it is really eating at you, ask him! Don't be confrontational, just tell him how you perceived him to be when you were opening up. If you felt comfortable telling him what you did, then there is no wrong doing here. Even though I have no clue who you are, I'm proud of you.
2006-10-24 16:33:10 · answer #2 · answered by cagewalker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It appears like the man has problems and so be mindful. At the top of the day it appears like he's establishing as much as you besides. As lengthy as you're powerful and be given that you could get harm if you happen to hold down this course then you don't have anything to fear approximately an excessive amount of. Just supply him time and make a couple of plans with him. Nothing heavy, simply possibly cross out on a few 'pal' style dates. Eventually you'll get to understand each and every different larger. You sound like a satisfactory individual and on the finish of the day the man is not comprised of steel. He will clearly begin to broaden a few variety of attachment and emotions for you (it's only human nature for this to occur). The query is, what style of emotions? They will not be those you desire (i.e. romantic). If you're already drowsing in combination then he MUST fancy you or else this would not be going down. I could say take it gradual and do not rush it. Be cautious despite the fact that, do not permit him play you for a idiot. It appears like he's spouting off relatively a little bit of crap commonly seeking to defend himself. Keep your eyes peeled for the caution indicators (i.e. he's talkiing of load of **** and simply desires to get to your pants). Men and females use this style of opposite psychology at all times i.e. I'm this type of dangerous individual bla bla bla - after which they may be able to deal with you favor garbage due to the fact that they warned you - guilt unfastened - WATCH OUT!
2016-09-01 02:17:19 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe both of you haven't an open communication line. If you're never talk openly and direct about yourself, how could you expect to share and don't have consecuences like you talk?
there is not another way that you become confident with each other and retake the talk that origin all the thing.
you mus consider that you didn't say what you talk about... thats an important issue.
2006-10-24 16:32:26 · answer #4 · answered by luis h 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
as an emotional baggage person u may have given him more to think about. maybe talking about his baggage has caused him to think about his. that happened to me. currently my baggage is packed and i'm not sharing anything because it's too much for my loved ones. sometimes u have to judge whether or not u need counseling to let a pro help u deal and explain it.
2006-10-24 16:29:46 · answer #5 · answered by cyberdjunk69 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's ok to open up. If my gf never opened up I would think she was hiding something or not being herself. ...and too much would push me away. Don't think you need to be sorry or need to justify yourself. Instead of trying to fix a negative, make a positive: talk about something that he likes. We love home cooked meals. Ask what he wants tomorrow for dinner, stop by the store to pick up ingredients and cook it for him. A well fed man is a happy man
2006-10-24 16:50:45 · answer #6 · answered by 33ea 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course it's important to open up to some degree, but you don't want to overwhelm a new partner with too much info about your past. We all have our issues & baggage but it's more important to DEAL with it and move on to better things.
2006-10-24 16:30:40 · answer #7 · answered by zmj 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
..u F* up.
It depends on how long u've been with dude and what your relationship is like.
If Superman had told kyrptonite kills him then Lex Luthor would have taxed that @** a long time ago.
2006-10-24 16:31:00 · answer #8 · answered by Jade 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you should be ok, honesty is the cornerstone of a good relationship. He should realize that if you did get that stuff off your chest, you'll feel better.
2006-10-24 16:28:17 · answer #9 · answered by Sentinel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know any guy who likes to hear his girlfriend open up. It's just how guys are. It suprises me to hear that he did the same.
2006-10-24 16:28:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋