I came across my girlfriend's webpage, and a guy that i know is asking her to have dinner, and he wrote on his reply "i'll setup a dinner date". i can't say reading that made me feel all too great. I have never not allowed her to have dinner with other guy friends, but i feel like this one guy has an agenda. i'm sure she knows that i will be able to read his comment, but i wonder if she will at least let me know "hey, is it ok if i go and have dinner with so-n-so?" and i may be like "i have to be honest, i don't feel entirely comfortable with the idea, but i'm not going to tell you what you can or can't do..." am i wrong for feeling like she should at least tell me? i know i can't restrict her from doing what she wants, but i guess it's just that feeling that you're not enough, ya know.
on the flip side, if your boyfriend was going to have dinner with a girl-friend, would you be ok with it? wouldn't want him to at least give you a heads up?
2006-10-24 14:53:35 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
An OLD saying:
If you love something, set it free.
If it comes back, it is yours for life.
If it doesn't come back, it never was yours.
Good luck. Pops
2006-10-24 14:57:56 · answer #1 · answered by Pops 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm married, but I'll answer this out of my memories of being single. ;)
If my gf were arranging a dinner date with another man, I'd definitely want her to ask me if it's OK with me first -- and if I thought that the other guy "had an agenda," as you put it, I'd want that to be a big factor in her decision whether or not to go. I wouldn't tell her not to go, but I'd be clear that I didn't want her to.
If, OTOH, she goes on the date without telling you, that counts as sneaking around -- a pretty powerful indicator that the relationship is in bad shape. My advice is that you sit back and see what she does. That will let you know whether or not you can continue to trust her. Oh, and if she makes a habit of seeing other people but expects you to be exclusive, that's sign that she's not really committed to you.
2006-10-24 15:04:58 · answer #2 · answered by D'archangel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally I'm probably the wrong person to answer this since I tend to be overprotective of my daughter even though she is 23 but from past experiences her boyfriends have put her through in which I had to intervene which didn't work out for some of these young males who thought that me being older and their belief that they are invincible gave them a one way ticket to the wonderful world of reality and got one thrown in jail. Well, my advice would be to talk to her not trying to interfere with her decisions but with the intention that you express that you care for her and are concerned for her well being and safety which if expressed from your heart would in no way infringe on her decisions yet make her realize that you are honestly concerned and care for the friendship you have which is more important than a guy or girl who is interested in a date. If that doesn't work then resort to the wonderful world of reality. Good luck
2006-10-24 15:34:54 · answer #3 · answered by cantgofrg 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many believe the foundation of a strong and happy relationship is Honesty.
1. She should definately tell you!
2. You must let her know that yes you do feel uncomfortable, and yes you did go get that off her site
3. If she goes and doesn't tell you details, like that she's going, then let her go! I love my boyfriend, and I have other male friends, but I would NEVER go out with any of them if he wasn't going too! That to me is the other meaning of Double Dating....Oh and on the flip side...if my BF went out with another girl and he didn't ask me to go or atleast tell me he was going, then I'd say bye to him too.
2006-10-24 15:00:56 · answer #4 · answered by Stormie_Mommie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-11-25 19:16:45 · answer #5 · answered by rubinstein 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if my boyfriend was gonna have dinner w/one of my friends i would definitely want a heads up! though i dont know why my boyfriend would be having dinner w/one of my friends in the first place.
2006-10-24 14:58:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn’t feel bad about how you feel and well if I where you I would bring it up and well this is a down side maybe she’s thinking about a break up or she was just pulling that guys leg.... hope it works out.
2006-10-24 14:58:12 · answer #7 · answered by none 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes, she should have told you and the guy if he is a friend of yours should have asked you first if you would mind if he took her out.
If she should ask you if she can go with him my advice to you is to yes, you ,me, and him can have dinner together
2006-10-24 15:10:34 · answer #8 · answered by mamayer6 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you otherwise trust her, so maybe give her the benefit of the doubt on this one. Best of luck to you.
2006-10-24 14:56:18 · answer #9 · answered by floridapammy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow i would hate that... just ask her why she wouldent tell you, but dont be like ur trying to find out if she murdered someone. just ask once then she wont feel intruded or like your trying to control her
2006-10-24 14:58:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋