Low Self-esteem?

Question

Does anyone have any advise on how to raise your self esteem levels. I used to be so confident and now I just don't I have anxity and my doctor told me that this could be why but i just don't know. I've got a wonderful fiance but because i feel so horrible about myself i'm so scared that I will lose him. I trust him i just feel so down about myself. He never puts me down he is always trying to make me feel better.

Answer 1

oh wow. some one who is the same boat as me! but i have the answer. when i met him, i was thin and had great confidence. but now, i have gained some weight and not feeling too good about myself. i constantly feel like he wants to be with another woman! here it is! do something you want to do. like color your hair or get your nails done. by exploring some change, it can give you enough confidence you need to make the effort of bettering yourself! you need to feel good about who you are without looking for someone elses approval. but this is all about baby steps. talk to him, tell him your thoughts. he will surly encourage you..i mean, he loves you right?

Answer 2

Two simple ways to build self-esteem: Goals & Gratitude diary.
Set some goals to work on. It can be as simple as 'I'll read a newspaper everyday' to big goals like getting a degree. Goals help you learn and develop skills which make you confident and reduce self doubts which are generally precursors to low self-esteem.
But at the same time you also need to pat yourself on the back and enjoy life and thats where the gratitude diary comes in.

To quote from the self-esteem page (link below):
"Maintain a "gratitude diary" to correct your self-perceptions - Make a list of the things that you already have that were once goals - all the things in your day you can do, the activities and people of your life you are most grateful for, the resources you already have available to you. Add to this list ever day - write down at least one thing you are glad about every day ..."

Answer 3

Take a good long look in the mirror & tell yourself how wonderful you really are. Make a daily journal of something you have done nice for someone or helped someone out in some way or even made someone else feel good about themselves. Real beauty is within yourself, if you can't love yourself, it will be that much harder for your fiance to....... I am sure you are a wonderful person!

Answer 4

I have very low esteem as well and I know it's hard. I feel the same way as you do...but time and love from my husband since we married, I'm getting better every day. Eating well, doing some light excercise, doing what you like and your partner's love would do well for you for sure.

It's been tad more than 3 years, but I'm starting to like myself more for first time in my life. I hope you'll like yourself again sometime soon, I wish you good luck. Take care of yourself!

Answer 5

The anxiety might have a lot to do with it. Dressing up and painting your nails might make you feel good for a couple of hours, but it won't fix the underlying problem. You really need to seek counseling. Your doctor might even want to prescribe medication for the anxiety. Remember, this isn't your fault, and there is no shame in getting help for it.

Answer 6

For me I get dressed up, fix my hair as good as I can, makeup a must make myself look like a million dollars. Put on something sexy (even if it is underwear) make myself feel like wow I am wonderful. If this doesn't work ice cream, ice cream, ice cream..

Just remember there is nobody else like you and you wonderful fiance knows that. Plus look at the world especially third world countries wow we could have it so worse. You are soooo lucky. Just remember that.

Answer 7

Have you tried yoga? Seriously, my best friend who is a cop had a huge mental breakdown in the locker room. He had to be carried to the hospital because of the panic attack, was subscribed the medicine but he hesitated to take. I forced him to take the medication for atleast three months but he doesnt listen. Oneday, out of the blue he asked me where i was going. I told him that i was attending yoga twice a week (at the Hatha Yoga center which offers cheap yoga sessions) for my recent Post traumatic stress.
Immediately, i realised i should take him there too. So we went together for like four months before i had to move to another location. But I saw the positive result in him. the whole streaching of the body and meditation and chant had a huge impact on his body. It really relieves stress by simple method of clearing your head from bad thoughts and relaxing your body the whole time and streaching your muscles for good circulation of the blood.
So, based on my experience i would like you to give it a shot at yoga.

Answer 8

Yes, please read any book by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer who is an amazing inspirational speaker and writer, not to mention psychologist. Reading one of his books will make you realize that your happiness and satisfaction for your life is totally within your control.

I recommend starting out with The Power of Intention, but really, any of his many, many books will do because you can't help but feel good and feel more empowered upon reading any of his work.

Answer 9

Talk to a counselor or psychologist. I know that when I suffered from it years ago, it helped me so much to talk to a professional about it. At first I was reluctant, but it did help me a lot.

Answer 10

Count your blessings!

Read Andrew Matthews books.