this is kinda hard to fully explain for the longest my mother has treated me like the outsider of her children. all together there are five of us, 3 girls and 2 boys. me being the youngest girl and my 13 year old brother being the youngest boy we are treated like crap!
but my mother has always picked on me for whatever reason she tries to jeapordize everything that i try to do and she talks about me like a dog. but im the only one of her children so far that is trying to make somethinf out of themselves. I was just accepted into medical school, i work partime, and im practically homeless! i dont have any kids but i work hard. my older sis, had kids early and never went to college, but she tells me all the time im stupid, ugly, etc etc... What is her deal? why does she hate me and im pretty much the only good child that she has.
she wont help me to get finaial aid, cause i need her tax papers because in under 25 years old!
2006-10-24 12:54:47 · 20 answers · asked by gaurdianangelic 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Sounds like you might need to consider going out on your own. I'm sure there are grants you could get to help with college. Be proud of who you are and what you want to accomplish. Don't hang on to having approval from anyone. I'm proud of you for doing this. You keep your chin up and work hard to accomplish what you want for yourself. Everything else will fall into place.
HUGS!
2006-10-24 12:58:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Congrats on getting into medical school. You must really be working your butt off!!
It sounds like your mother has always known your potential and been jealous of it. Maybe it's the same way with your brother. With your older sister who had kids when she was young and didn't go to college, your mother felt "safe." There was nothing to be jealous of. But you...you're trying to be successful. Maybe your mother is feeling inferior...like you're smarter than she is. You probably are and she doesn't like it! That doesn't justify why she treats you like that, just a possible explaination. The reason your sister treats you like that is: 1. because your mom does, 2. because you let her, and 3. because she IS jealous.
The next time you're talking about going to medical school and all that you hope to accomplish (and you can bring this up in a non-confrontational manner), tell your mom that she means a lot to you and tell her that you'd never be where you are today without her. You don't have to actually say a word about her not being supportive or anything. I think that the truth is that as you were growing up, you saw how she was and your sister was and decided that you didn't want that life for yourself...that you wanted something better. You don't have to tell her that, exactly, but by saying that you'd never be where you are today (getting into med. school, etc...) without her could actually be a true statement. Hopefully, she will take it as a compliment and change the way she thinks about you.
You are doing great! Don't listen to these people, even if they are family. They are bringing you down and making you doubt yourself. You must remain confident and strong!
Lots of hugs...Joy
2006-10-24 13:43:22 · answer #2 · answered by Joy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all hang in there. Life does get better even if its without your mom. That may be a hard choice to make however you have to do whatever will bring you joy, peace and happiness. If your mother is to stuck in the negative you might have to cut her off so YOU can stay in the postive. Look into grants, scholarships and loans and follow your blisss. You never know what the future holds and maybe one day your moms will wake up and see what blessing you are and have always been. Bottom line do what ever it takes to find your own way in life.
If you need help finding resources for financial aid you can email me at klynhew@yahoo.com. or a good friend i shared this with at go4urs2@aol.com
2006-10-24 13:20:29 · answer #3 · answered by klynhew 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me like she is jealous of you. And verbally abusing you, which is toally wrong on her part. Of course it does not make it easier for you to digest. But it still is not excuse for her or anyone else to treat you this way. I am so sorry that you have a hard way to go. But in the long run you still will come out the one on top. If I were you I would get into conseling and take your mother with you because she has some serious problems, and you could get the emotional help that you are needing. Don't worry though you are a good person
2006-10-24 13:01:35 · answer #4 · answered by Leilani L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it's impossible for us to know why your mother hates you. What's important is that you believe in yourself and what you are trying to achieve. Your mom is likely going through some emotional struggles that have little to do with you. She just finds it easy to take it out on you and your brother.
I'm not sure if you were accepted to pre-med or actual medical school, but you need to speak to a financial counselor at that school and explain your financial situation and they will likely lead you to scholarships, grants and loan programs. Best of luck.
2006-10-24 13:02:24 · answer #5 · answered by Apple21 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes mothers can be jealous, yes jealous, of their kids making good. Looks like you'll have to take matters into your own hands and maybe stay away from mother and don't let her be involved in any of your financial and personal business so she doesn't have a chance to jeopardize them. Talk to your student counselor at school and see if there are any ways to get grants and loans without mother's help. Seems to me there should be a way? Maybe they can do something with your tax records?
In any case, don't let mother keep you down, stay away from her as much as you can, get on with your own life and let mother be miserable on her own.
Good luck, kiddo.
2006-10-24 13:08:27 · answer #6 · answered by Mo the treehugger! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well one reason is may be she is scared about something generally mother and daughter are very close to each other but im sorry to hear ur situation try talking to her if that dosent help then try talking to ur guidance councler some time they really help good kids like urself alot coz they want u to be good in life . as for ur mother she is just scared and worried bout her other kidsand she cannot take her frustation out anywhere else so it comes out on u dont worry its just a bad phase of life it will pass by soon. and if u from NJ area may be i can help u with ur living problem . i know lot of institutions where kids like urself can live and study. u can contact me through my email mrdeeds_1983@yahoo.com
2006-10-24 13:02:22 · answer #7 · answered by mrdeeds_1983 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She seems to be threatened by your success. Keep doing what you are doing. Make your life a success in spite of your mother. Unfortunately some mothers shouldn't be mothers. I'm sorry for how you grew up, but it seems to have made you a stronger person. I'm sorry I don't now what to tell you as far as the tax returns. There's no way I know of to force her to give you the info.
2006-10-24 13:01:27 · answer #8 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like to me, she is jealous of you. She never made anything of herself and does want you to either. I would just ignor and keep on doing what you are doing for yourself. Just make sure when you have kids to break the cycle not do the same thing to them. Just keep up the good work and maybe one day she will be proud. Good luck.
2006-10-25 04:52:42 · answer #9 · answered by la_southern_femme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your mother is putting you down because it seems as though you are more than what she ever thought she or any of her kids could be. i think she's just jealous of you and your success. talk to other relatives and friends about the $$ issue, but make sure your mom knows that she should be jealous because you are a succesful young woman
congrats on med school!
2006-10-24 12:59:01 · answer #10 · answered by lalapalooza 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋