I've been happily married to the love of my life for 3 years. 1 year ago we found we were expecting our first child. We were both very excited! We fournished a baby room, baby proofed the house, and have started going back to church regularly. Three months ago I gave birth to our son, Gabriel. At first things went good, we were both excited. But then he started to act strange. He worked late and when he got home slumped in front of the tv. I'd ask him if he wanted to help out with Gabriel but he would always refuse. He also decided he didn't want to go to church regularly anymore either. He always found excuses to not interact with Gabriel and eventually was starting to tune me out too! We argue and fight constantly now. I don't know what is wrong with him! I feel like I'm losing my husband! What is wrong with him?
2006-10-24 12:27:25 · 12 answers · asked by Dara F 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
talk to him...ask him the questions you have asked here...there are too many variables for us to answer
2006-10-24 12:29:43 · answer #1 · answered by Becky 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he is jealous of you spending all your time with Gabriel.My husband was at first when we had our daughter, but he got more involved when she got out of the crying and sleeping stage. Because he could actually play with her. Get your self in a position that you can't get out of and give him no choice to take care of Gabriel. he's the father he will do it. Give them some time to bond without you.But if it makes you feel better you can watch from afar. But don't let him know it or he will think you don't trust him which may also be some of the problem. He is just down in the dumps and he will snap out of it. As for going to Church I think the Lord may be dealing with him and he doesn't know how to handle it. All he needs there is your prays because my God doesn't forget anyone and only he can help your husband just pray for him and I will to. GOOD LUCK and smile GOD loves you and your family
2006-10-24 19:48:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he's afraid he doesn't know how to take care of the baby and he could be feeling overwhelmed by the responsibility of taking care of a family. You should talk not argue. Just let him know that you are there if he needs to talk about anything that's bothering him and that no matter what you love him and will support him through what ever. The key is to not ARGUE b/c arguing doesn't get thru to men. They just tune it out. Eventually he should come around if not go to counseling.
2006-10-24 19:34:24 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he's suffering from something simmilar to Post-Partum Depression. He didn't carry the child but when the child was born, he became depressed.
He doesn't want to interact with him because he's so depressed.
You and him need to go to the doctor as soon as possible. Describe his problem and hopefully they can get him some counseling.
It's not that he doesn't love you or the son; he's actually going through something. Usually, this happens with mothers. However, it's possible to have with the newly father therefore, it's best to talk about it with a professional.
2006-10-24 19:34:48 · answer #4 · answered by ♪Msz. Nena♫ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I really dont mean to get too personal...but how is your intimacy going with him....if you notice that he has chosen not to as often....I reallllly dont mean to say this, but it may be that he may be having trouble in the faithful department as a husband. I hope you have not refrained in intimacy with him because sometimes it does after having children...seem to diminish...but it doesnt have to. And if you have ruled this out...maybe he feels overwhelmed as a provider, husband or a father. Try to communicate in a very sensitive way to find out whats going on and I am sorry if I have casted doubt in your mind...it just that I see the signs....
2006-10-24 19:43:51 · answer #5 · answered by rzblossom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
even though null was kinda hard to understand his right. my husband started acting this way and when i asked him why, his reposne was "every things changed, we cant just get up and go out when ever, u don't dress as sexy anymore and the hardest for him to say was he was jealous of our son because my world now revolved around my son. for example if u were in the middle of satisfying Ur husband and ur son Gabriel starts crying u will say sorry just a sec and quickly run off to fix Gabriel if though its Ur job to fix Ur son and Ur husband knows that in the back off his head his thinking this is my woman and my time so shut up kid. even though he probably hates himself for it he probably thinking it.men can be like babies they need nuturing to. good luck
2006-10-24 19:52:04 · answer #6 · answered by mrs nevz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is feeling the daddy crunch. His live as a cool guy is over and he sees that he will soon be a live sucked out of him dad. He has seen it in too many guys. And worse, you have changed. Your not the sexy woman her married...your not a mom. And, of couse, the baby comes first before everything.
This is just something most guys have to work through....
2006-10-24 19:31:22 · answer #7 · answered by null_the_living_darkness 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i have been there they got use to it being the two of u now there is a 3rd person there now ur huband was use to getting all of ur attion and now he has to compete for it we for get that they are still a child in ways to we just have to spend some time with him that u did before the baby plus i know mine was afraid to help with the baby for the thinking that he might hurt the baby but after the child gets older that will change to
2006-10-24 19:40:26 · answer #8 · answered by TEA-JAY 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't speak for all husbands, but perhaps the problem is he is starting to realize he is not the center of your world anymore. it sounds somewhat selfish, I know, but that's a hard role to give up. Now the baby comes first, and it sounds like perhaps he feels like he is a second class citizen as a result. And that's a hard pill to swallow for any man or woman.
2006-10-24 19:30:43 · answer #9 · answered by ? 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
did you ever think he was molested as a child and feels that he would do it to,,,and he is withdrawing from you and your son and God,, good luck,and i hope your ok with my answere,,,
2006-10-24 20:40:18 · answer #10 · answered by tysgrandma99 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋