A woman decides to have a facelift for her 50th birthday. She spend
$5,000 and feels pretty good about the results. On her way home, she
stops at a news stand to buy a newspaper. Before leaving, she says to
the clerk, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think
I am?"
"About 32," is the reply.
"Nope! I'm exactly 50," the woman says happily.
A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter
girlthe very same question. The girl replies, "I guess about 29."
The woman replies, "Nope I'm 50."
Now she's feeling really good about herself. She stops in a drug store
on her way down the street. She goes up to the counter to get some mints
and asks the clerk this burning question. The clerk responds, "Oh,
I'd say 30."
Again she proudly responds, "I am 50, but thank you."
While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting
next to her the same question.
He replies, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eye sight is going. Although, when I
was young, there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds
very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra.
Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are."
They wait in silence on the empty street until curiosity gets the best
of her. She finally blurts out, "What the hell, go ahead."
He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around
very slowly and carefully. He bounces and weighs each breast. He gently
pinches each nipple. He pushes her breasts together and rubs them
against each other.
After a couple of minutes of this, she says, "Okay, okay. How old am I?"
He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and
says, "Madam, you are 50."
Stunned and amazed, the woman says, "That was incredible, how could
you tell?'
The old man says, "Promise you won't get mad?"
"I promise I won't." she says.
"I was behind you in the line at McDonald's."
2006-10-24 09:05:08 · 36 answers · asked by lost_rabbit 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
just for chaz in yahoo answers there is a section for jokes and riddles so i can post jokes if i want.
2006-10-24 10:03:00 · update #1
That is fantastic!
Thumbs Up for you matey!!
Lil Mama.... you're a loser!
2006-10-24 09:35:28 · answer #1 · answered by Kirk_84 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
10/10!
2006-10-24 10:54:44 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Chuckle
2006-10-24 09:14:09 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hahhahhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. LOL. The old man is the biggest pervert ever. hahahaha amazing. Good one.
2006-10-24 09:58:24 · answer #4 · answered by tyana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LMAO, oh **** this was a good one, best one I have heard all day.
I just said that to another poster but you have succedded them.
2006-10-24 09:10:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lol!Thats a good one!=D
2006-10-24 12:52:14 · answer #6 · answered by hannahrottger 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not worth reading.
2006-10-24 11:07:46 · answer #7 · answered by malcy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That was to funny and I bet so true, bad man anyway.
2006-10-24 09:10:46 · answer #8 · answered by Beth B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cheeky monkey!!!! Did she slap him on the face afterwards lol?
2006-10-24 09:09:55 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good one for today ha ah ah ah ahe he he eh ho hhoh hoh hoh
2006-10-24 09:09:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋