i'm dating this guy from my english class. we've gone out a couple of times, and everything is going good.
my problem is that i use to be anorexic/bulimic and i use to be a cutter as well.( i stop cutting just a couple of months ago) i'm worried that one day he will see my scars and ask me where i got them from. i don't want to lie to him, but i don't want to scare him off, because i really like him. i'm so afraid that he'll just turn his back on me or stop dating me because of it. i have scars on my arms, but mostly on my thighs, so i always wear pants but sooner or later he will see them. i just don't want him to think i'm crazy or something, i don't want him to think less of me. what should i do?
i could really use some help with this, any advice would help.
you can also email me at xpenguinchickx@yahoo.
2006-10-24 08:54:24 · 12 answers · asked by PIXIE 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Of course curiousity will make him ask eventually. When the time comes you should let him know..only if you feel comfortable. There is a time and place to tell people something so personal and just make sure you wait for that time. He isn't obligated to know everything about you in a month. If he asks and you aren't ready to share just let him know that it's something personal to you and you will share it with him just not right now. If he's a good guy he should understand and respect your feelings.
2006-10-24 09:00:17 · answer #1 · answered by ChellaBella 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If by the time he sees your scars he would leave you for that then you are all the better. My girl had some problems and she tried breaking up with me when we first started dating cause she was afraid of what I would think. I had already fallen for her and we were able to work things out together. Have a little faith in the boy! That's what I tell my girl anyway
2006-10-24 15:59:10 · answer #2 · answered by curious caucasian 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should tell him. Maybe you can wait a bit till you are really comfortable enough with him that you can start sharing with him.
Its always better to tell the truth about matters like this than if he finds it out any other way. That would create more confusion.
Whether he is OK with it or not will depend on how much he likes you. If he is not ok with it .. its probably better that he knows about it now rather than later, when you both get more attached to each other. If you tell him really late in your relationship he might feel offended that you had hid this from him.
Just my 2 cents.. hope it helps
2006-10-24 16:03:47 · answer #3 · answered by quirkycyrano 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can tell him, but not just yet. You have only gone out a few times - correct? Wait a little longer & see how things go.
It's nothing to be ashamed of..it was something you've survived and it's only made you stronger. There's just no need to announce it to him yet - you don't know where this thing is going. IF it gets serious, then tell him.
Take care.
2006-10-24 15:57:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would be hard to lie about things if the marks are on you and your right he will see them one day. If he is a great guy (i assume he is since u like him so much) then he will understand. If he isnt understanding then you need someone who is and will support you in the ways you need support. I know it will be hard but i say tell him. Good Luck and Take Care :)
2006-10-24 15:59:24 · answer #5 · answered by bitbaygirl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're still in highschool or under, do not tell him. That's the last thing you want floating around the school. Save that personal of information for real men when you get into the real world. Not for little boys.
2006-10-24 15:58:41 · answer #6 · answered by Bmenace 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be completely honest. A lot of girls go through this stage and majority of us, including me, grow out of this and learn from our mistakes. If you like the guy don't be afraid of how he is going to react. If he really likes you he will accept you for who you are and disregard things that has happened previously.
2006-10-24 15:58:13 · answer #7 · answered by missdontgivafukusa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
will i really don't know what to say but just take it one day at a time, then when it gets to the day that he'll ask about them just tell him the truth,every one haves secrets. and it its mean to be then he'll look pass that and see the real you
2006-10-24 16:03:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't bring it up. If he asks about the scars just tell him that you went through a messed up time in your life, and that it's all behind you.
2006-10-24 15:58:16 · answer #9 · answered by Rebecca 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its always good to be open and honest but its also good to have a need to know basis policy so wait till thectimecomes and try to resolve those issues before u tell its your baggage not his
2006-10-24 15:59:58 · answer #10 · answered by luis_11211 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋