So, I know that someone is on drugs, crystal meth, using all the time and spending money on it hand over fist. Until broke in all cases and borrowing and stealing people blind to pad the habit. She has kids, two, and I feel closing in on serious health and legal problems. Of course, she doesnt think she has a problem and denys heavy use. The next problem is that she is my wife of now 10+ years. I could walk away with the kids and leave her high(pun intended) and dry, but I dont want to see her dead in a ditch. She wont listen to rehab or to councling. What can I do??
2006-10-24 07:45:49 · 20 answers · asked by Don F 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
ok, quickly seen answers with forceful intervention. How and where do I get info on it? What does it intail????
2006-10-24 07:54:42 · update #1
There are obvious answers such as medical health professionals, rehabilitation, but the truth is until your wife or anyone realizes they have a problem, they don't have a problem. At least not in their mind they don't. So what can you do? Perhaps leave and take the children to a safe place while securing a "protection from abuse" order from a court. Otherwise you will find yourself sued and possibly criminally charged. Document everything you can. A paper trail is key to a good defense. And believe you will be made out to be the villian. Quite often it is the innocent party accused of wrong doing. Close your bank accounts and reopen them only in your name. Document your actions and reasons for your actions.
But be sure you can prove what you state is the problem. If you can't you could be held responsible. If you can't then there is no need for you to go any further in assisting your spouse. Remember whatever you do must be for the protection of your children. Regardless of their being from your marriage or a prior relationship they are still your responsibility since you are married to their mother.
Otherwise, contact a 12-step program. Get professionals involved and protect your children. If you don't you will be the one held accountable for wrong doing.
2006-10-24 07:58:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being addicted to meth is bad. The type of people she hangs out with or buys from, are bad news. Also, meth is a sex drug, so don't be surprised if she cheats on you. If she won't get help, then you have to get those kids away from her until she is clean. An intervention is the best way for her to see how her drug use effects everyone around her.
2006-10-24 07:57:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, try an intervention, tell her you are leaving and taking the kids if she doesn't quit. This problem is not going to fix itself. You have to do the right thing for the kids. And the right thing is to
A) Try to get her clean
B) Take the kids and start a life away from all that mess
2006-10-24 07:56:03 · answer #3 · answered by Answer Schmancer 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes you can do a intervention but bottom line is ,, she wont quit until she is ready to!!and like the others said she WILL drag you with her, the best thing for you to do is get the children out of the house and away from her , you might even consider legal advise in case she does get busted , they cant come after you or take the kids, this might sound harsh but a legal separation,,, if not for only your protection.I'm not saying to divorce her because at this time in her life she could care less about anything except her drugs,,, I wish you luck and prayers for the children
2006-10-24 08:58:25 · answer #4 · answered by MissMonk 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is very hard...crystal meth is the most addicting drug out there. i see it ruin lives everyday. But what I also see is that it hurts the whole family. Your wife is not going to be able to get rid of this on her own. Most will not even own up to their problem. She needs in an in treatment drug facility.Depending on the laws of your state..you might be able to put her in one. People that are on meth that bad do not care until they hit rock bottom or are dead. Your children should not have to see their mother live this way. Take the kids and start fresh. This may be the rock bottom that she needs and it might not affect her at all. It depends on how hooked she is.
2006-10-24 07:55:09 · answer #5 · answered by saved_by_grace 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I asked my husband to go with me to counseling; he finally agreed and when the Dr. talked to him he knew my husband was high; because he denied the problem the Dr. called for a police escort to take him to a treatment facility because the Dr. feared he would hurt himself or someone else; I know going under false pretenses was lying, but it was the only way I could get him any help; he eventually went back to drugs, but then I could walk away because I knew in my heart that I had done all I could to help; bottom line- unless the person wants help, no intervention will help
2006-10-24 08:01:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She denies heavy use?? any use is Heavy! Only Option is intervention! If that does not work and she does not obtain serious Help (in-house rehab) then tell her you will have no choice but to take the kids and leave!!! You are putting your children at risk just by staying around her. What will be next selling the kids toys or clothes? their piggy banks?? Please do something soon for for kids, They do not deserve to be around that if she refuses help!
2006-10-24 07:57:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Contact an attorney. I believe, as her spouse, her husband. You can have her admitted to rehab or confinement without her permission. It may depend upon what state you live in, but in many places that can be done.
Obviously, you will need to provide proof statements. Sworn statements from friends and family members, health issues, etc.
But it is imperitive you contact legal help, asap, for the proper direction.
I have seen the news of all the destruction this drug can do.
Good Luck!
2006-10-24 07:51:21 · answer #8 · answered by TG Special 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah that is a really tough problem, my brother was a heroin addict and he wouldn't get help either, he ended up getting arrested for robbing a gas station for drug money. Your best bet might be to leave and show her you mean it unless she checks into a rehab. It will be the worst time of your life, but if she recovers she will be eternally grateful. Sometimes tough love is the only way they learn, or in a prison cell. I wish you the best of luck!!
2006-10-24 07:52:10 · answer #9 · answered by Ash 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try an intervention. She has to take some responsibility herself though. If she won't maybed you should leave her high and dry. It's not good for the kids to be around this.
2006-10-24 07:49:55 · answer #10 · answered by lucy02 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋