Does my child have middle child syndrome ?

Question

I have a 9 year old, 4 year old, and now 11 month old. It all started when my brother's son was 6 months old my then 3 year old started stepping on his fingers when he crawled, pushing him down when he stood up, pinching,kicking,and punching him. Now I have a 11 month baby and he started all the same stuff with him. He repeatly does stuff he knows he not suppose to do. He screams when something doesn't go his way, or he doesn't get what he wants. It is so bad I don't like to take him anywhere by myself. If anybody has any suggestion please like me know.

Answer 1

My grandson is the same way and he's not a middle child. My daughter has been pulling her hair out with him. He has fits every day, throwing things when he doesn't get his way and demolishing his room. She's trying to get him put on anti anxiety meds. She doesn't want to but it's her last resort. We don't know what to do either. All I can tell you is your not alone.

Answer 2

Sounds like middle child syndrome to me, and it sounds like he was probably more than a little spoiled when he was "the baby."

Do you spank him when you catch him in the act, or do you try to reason with an unreasonable 4 year old? I'm not saying you need to beat your kids, but I'm saying that a smack on the butt, or a slap of the hand can do wonders for getting his attention. My daughter took to pinching when she was about a year and a half. We started giving her a slap on the hand when she did it, telling her that good girls don't pinch... She's now almost three and hasn't pinched in over a year.

If you don't want to take him places because you're afraid of his acting out... let him know that. Don't take him to the playground, restaurants, playdates, etc., and let him know that he'll get to have these priveleges back once he learns how to behave.

If there are specific things that he throws fits over (such as a favorite toy, crayons, etc.) let him see how it feels to not have them for a day or two. When you do give them back, tell him that you will take them away again if he doesn't play the way he knows he should. Back it up! You have to walk the walk for this to work.

All kids scream when they don't get their way, but the best way to cut the tantrums short is to let them know that they can't always have what they want, and it's not the end of the world. Maybe suggest a compromise... "if you sit quietly and let me finish the shopping, I'll let you watch ___(his favorite show) when we get home."

I think a carefully balanced approach positive reinforcement when he does well, and some consequences when he misbehaves should start producing results pretty quickly. Whatever you do, don't let him get the best of you. It's not going to be easy, but now is the time to teach him that bullying is not going to be tolerated later in life.

Answer 3

the middle or 2d born baby or children frequently have the sense of no longer belonging. they wrestle to obtain interest from moms and dads and others because they sense many situations they are being handed over or dubbed off as being a similar as yet another sibling. Being in the middle a baby can sense insecure. the middle baby frequently lackschronic and looks for course from the first born baby. now and again a center baby feels out of position because they don't seem over achievers and opt to flow with the bypass of issues. it is what the information superhighway website suggested and it exceptionally a lot is ideal. imagine about it, the middle baby isn't the first born and is no longer the child anymore. some children don't have a topic with it yet some do.

Answer 4

make a place in your home where he can have a time out. For a small child I believe the time out time is their age. So 3 year olds get 3 mins... which is a lifetime for them. Then sit him down and explain to him that big boys want to be good. give him reward when he is good, but when he isn't then take away his fave toy or make him sit in the time out place.
I have a son that is between 2 girls... at first I gave him big boy jobs and he would be rewarded. Then if he did something wrong his reward was taken away. He liked the reward better and stopped doing mean things. Be consistant.

Answer 5

He needs to be punished when he does that. It sounds like jealousy. But every time he hurts the baby, get down on his level, look him in the eye, and calmly say "we do not hurt the baby." THen give him a time-out. If he does this out in public, leave the place immediately so he knows that it is still not allowed even when he isn't at home.

Answer 6

First, every child needs to feel special in some way. Many kids find this in academics, sports, social popularity or a special skill area such as computers or art. He needs to feel loved, but also would benefit by feeling special or proficient in a skill or activity
It's actually a middle child syndrome. it's normal.

Answer 7

It isn't middle child syndrome. That is more of a "poor me, I don't get anything" type. It sounds like he has never been given boundaries or consequences. You could try teaching him you are the boss and what you say goes. If he doesn't comply then there will be consequences he doesn't like. Then BE FIRM. It will get easier. Make sure you tell him that you "love him enough to make him mind" and "that will help him be a good person". But be firm. Good luck.

Answer 8

I do not think it is normal for him to want to hurt children younger than he is. I would take him to the doctor and discuss all the problems with him/her. Once you have stressed to the doctor how worried you are about his behavior, the doctor will be able to discuss all courses of action available. While "acting out" seems to be normal for most children when they need attention, the need to hurt others is not. Good luck to you. I hope you are able to find what you need.

Answer 9

he needs a good old fashion spakin, eve you start doing the samethings to him as he fo to the baby i promise he'll stop(ex>>like bitting him back, don't step on the baby fingers or anything like that)