my mom....?

Question

my mom leaves to work almost everyday for 12 hours. she doesnt even call unless i call.
and plus, she doesn't even care i dont think.
but dont worry i called her just a while ago and let out a peice of my mind. i really took care of her.
should i have done that?
i mean shes nice and all but she doesnt care about me.
and i just wanted her to know i wasnt really happy about that.

Answer 1

Aww...forget about her and come to papa..... ;)

Answer 2

It sounds like you called her and acted like a child... so she's likely to treat you like a child.

If you want to get adult results, you'll have to act in a more mature manner. Call her back, apologize for your outburst, and ask her if there's a time when the two of you could sit down and talk about how things are going. Make a list of the things you want to say, so that when emotions start to fly, you can be sure that you get it all said. Avoid making accusations... keep things like "You always do (whatever)" out of it, and say things like, "I feel lonely and abandoned when you're gone so much without calling."

Ask her to tell you why she works so much... is it because the family needs the money? Is it because she derives a lot of personal fulfillment from her work? Does it give her some respect that she can't get at home? Is she afraid that if she cuts back on hours, she'll lose the job?

My guess is that she does care about you... she just doesn't know how to show it in a way in which you can FEEL it. It's possible that talking it over will help you both resolve things. If not, maybe some family counseling would help.

Good luck!

Answer 3

What makes you think your mom doesn't care? Maybe she doesn't call because she is at her job and busy?

Sounds like you and she need to have a long talk. Just be prepared to hear things you don't want to hear. But tell her your concerns calmly and honestly. And watch the "me" thing -- I want, I need, I expect.

Calling her at work is something I would never have done, and didn't like when my kids did it to me. Letting out a piece of your mind sounds like you got angry. Not good.

Your mother is responsible for you until you are 18. That is a huge responsibility, and her 12 hour days are probably in direct relation to that. Have a little respect for her, you will be surprised how far that will go.

Judging from your question --- what are you doing out of school, anyway?

Answer 4

I think it was a good thing that you spoke to your mom about the situation. Here lies the question. Did you yell and get upset and act out of emotion? Or did you rationally explain things to her and tell her how you feel? If you were calm and collected than I think you did a good think. By yelling at her you may have alienated yourselves even more. Sometimes a letter can work well too if you are unsure of what to say. Good luck with you and your mom and I hope everything works out for the best.

Answer 5

her working 12 hour days does not mean she doesn't care about you. it means she's busting her *** trying to provide a happy and stable home for you. some careers involve a lot of work, and she may not have the opportunity to call you. if you want to have a better relationship with your mother, you should start by having a little respect for her. would you rather her not work and live in a poverty stricken home? you should try to sit down and have a real conversation with her about your feelings, not flying off the handle telling her she's a bad mother.

Answer 6

You should certainly tell her how you feel. I'm sure she cares about you, but maybe she thinks you don't want her to 'care'. I know being a teenager is hard, but so is being the parent of a teenager. You should sit down with her and talk, letting her know that you feel she doesn't care about you. Try to see if you can make special time to spend together. Hang in there and good luck!!

Answer 7

First of all...ignore the perverts.
Your mother loves you.
Maybe you are taking her not calling the wrong way.
Maybe she trusts you enough to not be calling off the hook.
Try to explain to her that you would like it if she could call you a couple times while she is a t work because it would make you feel safer if you knew she was checking in with you.

Answer 8

well think about it this way money pays the bill and buys stuff the more money the better. One way to get money is to work a good job or work a normal job for a long hour like your mom. No you should always respect your elders I guess thats why nobody likes you

Answer 9

yer you are right to say something but you have to do it diplomatically remember she is your mother and you have to also remember (if your under sixteen) she maybe providing for your up bringing , your clothes and your life style. your mum may not want to work all these hours she may be worried about bills that are late and christmas is coming that means presents to buy. So dont go off on one just explain your fears and your concerns and listen to what she says .

Answer 10

Again, I wish you teens would put in your ages.. Your mom seems pretty self absorbed, unless she's developing a cure for some disease, she should at least call to see if your O.K. If your old enough to stay by yourself for 12 hours @ a time, then your old enough to let her know how you feel about it...

Answer 11

twiddlecakes... lol, thats funny.

I think teenagers project a lot of their own emotion and insecurities into the behavior of their parents and take offense to it.

But i think you should talk it out with her. It does seem a little much that she cant manage to check in on you all day. Although you certainly dont seem to be suffering for all the work she's doing, judging by your photo.