A Hodgepodge -?

Question

Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and never amounted to much. The second one, naturally, became known as the lesser of two weevils.
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Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? He wanted to transcend dental medication.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked. "Because", he said, "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.
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A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal". The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him "Juan". Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins!! If you've seen Juan you've seen Ahmal."

My mother sends them to me... I'm not entirely sure where she gets them. Pretty sure she's not the one coming up with them.

Answer 1

Very punny. Reminds me of the following story.

A doctor calls into the same bar every night on his way home from the surgery and orders his favourite drink, a daiquiri rum with a hazel nut dropped in it for flavour.

One night the barman has no hazel nuts left so drops in a hickory nut hoping the doctor won't notice.

Being perceptive the doctor turns to the barman and says,

"Hey barman. This drink doesn't taste the same as usual. What's different about it?"

"Oh yes, I'm sorry about that," Replies the barman, "I had no hazel nuts left so I've given you a Hickory Daiquiri doc."

Answer 2

How silly are you? Those are good. :O)

Answer 3

lol... those are cute...

where do you get these

lmao

Answer 4

What the heck is that all about????