I really have a lot of feelings for this man. He is great to me and great to my son, but there is a huge trust issue. I give him all sorts of freedom. He can do whatever he wantsHe drops me off at work and has my car all day and picks my son up from school then picks me up. He usually goes to a friends house at night and comes home accusing me of having someone over. I dont know what to do . I dont want to loose him but i cant live with the constant accusations
2006-10-24 05:33:54 · 36 answers · asked by Teri M 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I don't know how to break this to you, but your guy sounds like he is a control freak. He doesn't trust you and he controls you with his "rules" for you, and none for him. If he is keeping you from being with friends or family, he's emotionally abusive. Control freaks will isolate you (keep you from talking to friends, family, and not let you go anywhere on your own: he keeps the car!). This is not a good situation and very bad for your son to see happening to you. You need to show your son you have self-respect and dignity. Otherwise, he may grow up to be emotionally abusive of women, too. Tell this guy you will no longer stand for his behavior. If he loves you, he will respect you and give you the same rights as he has. Do not give him your car anymore. He can get his own! Take your car and yourself where you feel you want to be. Take your son with you. Good luck.
2006-10-24 05:42:37 · answer #1 · answered by Wiser1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You gave him to much to fast. What I mean is you gave him your car to do as he chooses all day with the exception of dropping you to work and picking you and your son up. After wards he has your car to do what ever he wants. He seems to rule the relationship because he can go out and hang out while your at home with your son. He's out there messing around with some girl and when he had his fun for that night he comes back in and accuses you of doing what he's doing out there. He is insecure and a cheater, you have your son to think about love is not suppose to hurt or make you feel like ****. Let him know that you can stand with out him, you were doing it before he came along you can do it with out him. Good luck!!!!
2006-10-24 06:04:24 · answer #2 · answered by BASHFUL 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a recipe for a bad relationship to me. You are bound for trouble when a man starts accusing you of cheating and he is gone all the time. What is he thinking by treating you like that especially when he uses your car all day? It sounds as if he is having some guilt issues and could potentially turn into an abuser. Get out.
2006-10-24 05:40:32 · answer #3 · answered by dumb guy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he is cheating on you and accusing you to keep you on the defensive and to make you think he will never cheat while he is cheating. Are you sure he is going to his friends place or somewhere else.
Maybe he has sex and so is not in the mood and so starts a fight and accuses you and goes to sleep.
You need to talk to him and tell him that you are not cheating.
You seriously need to think about your future with him cause if he keeps accusing you after marriage and this continues then your whole life will be a sad story.
Maybe he is just lacking confidence in himself and thinks that he is not good enough for you. If then, you need to talk to the poor fellow in a kind and nice way and tell him that you sincerely love him.
Good luck and hope everything turns out right.
2006-10-24 05:54:39 · answer #4 · answered by Mr Business 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what a loser, he dosen't even have a car! lmao.... good pick on this one! sounds like he's the cheater, the one accusing all the time is most likley the guilty party. If you have no trust you have nothing. soon he will start beating you , it will just be one great relationship. I don't understand why people stay with idiots and then wine about it as if they are ever going to change a thing, you'll stay in this unhappy realtionship and he will keep accusing you, you won't do a thing about it..
2006-10-24 05:45:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been married & with my husband for almost 13 years & my husband has accussed me of cheating or wanting someone or anyone depending on the situation our whole relationship.He was left by a parent when he was a child ,he felt abandoned & he was cheated on by prior marriage but, I feel like she just couldn't take the constant pressure & accusations. I have never cheated on him I love him but, I am tired & becoming numb.Tired that we can't function as a normal family or have a nice outing without all the tension of him getting upset over something.The way I stand or not able to talk to any man.I never even met my daughters husband for 6 years. I tried to do everything (all crazy things) gave up make up wearing anything nice, having any friends.,going to church, everything. I thought I could prove to him he could trust me.He told me he would trust me after 4 yr then 6yr then 10 & it going on 13 & we are in worse place ,he worse & I am because I feel like I want my life back & tired of always defending myself.I believe he loves me & I feel bad he is this way.I've tried counciling & nothing that I do or say makes it truly better.I am writing to let anyone who is searching for answers to just not give in to crazy demands or give up your life thinking it would be better it won't .
2016-03-28 06:09:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello, First of all I guess this guy is a good guy but I think he had a bad experience growing up. Maybe someone in his family cheated? Perhaps his mother cheated and perhaps left him. That's why he is accusing you of cheating. Is this guy single no kids when you started dating him? Now if he is. My next question is did he choose you and your child because it was an instant family in his mind? This guy has a lot of issue. He needs therapy. He has a lot of bagage if I were you leave him. Or if you really love him asked him to go see a therapist to resolve his issues.
2006-10-24 05:44:21 · answer #7 · answered by darkvadershield35 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Red flag. It will only get worse as time goes. If he's accusing you of not being faithful and has nothing to go on, then that is a serious issue. The last thing you want is someone who is so insecure that they bring you down with them. He can't trust you because of his severe self insecurity. He needs professional help if he wants to have a healthy relationship with you. If he is not willing to work on this issue, then leave him. I promise you, it WILL cause destruction in your relationship if he doen't change that behavior. I
2006-10-24 05:43:16 · answer #8 · answered by sweeta : 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like he is very insecure, and if it hasn't happened yet, it could lead into him being very possessive of you. No one needs that crap in a relationship, and the best thing you can do at this point, is walk away from it now before it blossoms into something far worse than accusations. He has issues that needs to be addressed by professionals.
2006-10-24 05:41:05 · answer #9 · answered by Jillybeanyweiney 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a proven fact that one who accuses you of cheating, either is cheating, or would given the proper circumstances. He doesn't trust you, because he doesn't trust himself. It's been documented thousands of times in all kinds of psychological journals etc. Basically, if he's accusing you, then you need to keep an eye on him, not vice versa.
2006-10-24 05:36:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋