Me and my hubby don't know what to do about him anymore. When he says he's thirsty we tell him "water" because we know he wants juice and he throws himself on the floor and starts screaming at the top of his lungs or says "no" and starts whining. He does this when ever we ask or tell him to do something. He has started this within the past couple of months and we have tried everything to get him to stop. I don't know what esle to do. Any suggestions?
2006-10-24 04:12:58 · 25 answers · asked by lovemybabies04 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
Act like it doesn't bother you.
In that situation, I'd give him water and nothing else and if he's thirsty - oh well.
You have to put your foot down now and show him who's boss or he'll walk all over you forever.
2006-10-24 04:14:48 · answer #1 · answered by Corn_Flake 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You should not ASK a child to do anything. You should TELL them to do something. Politely, of course, because you need to set a good example, but they need to know for sure what you expect of them and what the consequences will be if they don't comply.
You cannot be a passive parent. You must be firm, yet loving.
If you want him to have water, give him water. If he throws a fit, ignore it. If he refuses to drink it, oh well. If he was truly thirsty he would. DO NOT GIVE IN. That only reinforces the idea that his tantrums work and he will continue to use them to get his way. This is also a case where he could have 2 options Get quiet NOW or go to his room/quiet area of the house until he can calm down. It's not fair for everyone else to have to listen to that noise.
For my daughter, I just had to ignore them and for my son I used the 2nd method. It all depends on the kid as to what works best.
Be consistent. Have a set routine and make sure he's getting enough rest. If those things are not done, that only makes for an unhappy child and parents.
Good Luck. Raising toddlers and preschoolers is very challenging.
2006-10-24 15:58:59 · answer #2 · answered by jaxchick23 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Put a cup of water in the fridge, a special cup just for him. At that age he is old enough to go get it himself. If he wants water, just say "your water is in the fridge". You can also get these fun spouts that hook up (really cheap) to a bathroom faucet so they can get water themselves (it's like a dolphin or something that turns it into a water fountain) so it's fun to be independent.
My question is: why can't he have juice? Would there be less of a power struggle if you gave him juice? Could you try watering down juice so there's not too much juice and more water?
If it is NO ABSOLUTELY NO to juice in all the time, then you NEED TO BE CONSISTENT. You need to never let him have juice, one time and he'll be back to throwing tantrums for it b/c you gave in. You need to not tempt him and have NO JUICE in the entire house either. Take the temptation away.
I've heard some kids just don't like water as much, luckily my two kids are water freakazoids. But I wouldn't see much wrong in giving him watered down juice. (I'm sure if you talk to your doc he or she may say something similiar).
If you want a healthier option try putting a pitcher in the fridge with 2-3 bags of tea (try berry flavored ones), make sure it's decaffeinated! Tea will color the water and flavor it for your little one.
2006-10-24 12:04:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is going through "the terrible twos" which can happen any time between about 18 months and 4 years. Ignore the tantrums. If you offer water and he throws a tantrum walk away. He is simply trying to get attention and then get his way. Give in to him and you will be putting control of the situation in the hands of a three year old.
2006-10-24 11:53:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my professional life I have never found it necessary to put up with tantrums. Try asking the child what he wants juice or milk or water. But dont ask if you are only going to give him water just give it to him. When he throws his tantrum put him in a chair and tell him when he can behave he can get up. Therefore the amount of time he sits there is up to him. When he whines tell him that he gets nothing until he can ask in normal tone. Just stay consistent and he will straighten up.
2006-10-24 11:24:51 · answer #5 · answered by elaeblue 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not react to his negative behavior. Give him time out in his bedroom when he acts this way and you are at home. Put him in his room and be firm about him staying there and do not give in to his tantrums. If he gets a reaction from you when he throws his fits he will only continue to do this. Sooner or later he will stop when he realizes he will not get his way. It may take sometime and you may feel like giving in, but don't. Never reward negative behavior. If he behaves in a positive manner you can reward him by telling him that you are proud of him for acting good and doing what he is told. Make a chart and hang it on the refrigerator. Set realistic goals for him. Plan something special and teach him that he has to behave and obey you to be able to do something special such as a trip out to eat etc. Do not buy good behavior. Make him learn to have good behavior by ignoring the bad and only rewarding the good. You are the parent. You have to be frim and stay in control at all times. Even if it makes you feel like pulling your hair out. It will get better if you are consitant. I have 3 sons, all grown now, but I know it can get nerve shattering at times. My oldest son was hyper and a real handful on top of being mildly mentally handicapped so I have been there and done that. If you tell you son there will be a consequence for his bad behavior, always follow through with what you tell him. If you give warnings and don't act on them he will learn to ignore you. Be loving, but firm and follow through on what you expect from him. Good luck.
2006-10-28 01:12:17 · answer #6 · answered by luckiekitties 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a 4, 3, and 2 year old, and when one of my kids throw one of their little 'fits' like that I tell them in a calm voice "you can't act like that. If you need to cry then go in your room cuz we don't want to hear you." It usually works, if not then I put them in ther room (door open) and tell them to come out when they are ready to talk. Every kid is different. This works no problem every time with my daughter, the middle child, but my boys can occasionally be a struggle!!
More than likely it's just a phase of seeing how much he can get away with. Hopefully it won't last too long...lol..
2006-10-24 12:20:02 · answer #7 · answered by JenN 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When my daughter use to do this, I would send her to her room, explaining I didn't want to hear her throwing a fit. No matter how loud she would scream, or cry, I just ignored her. She was allowed to come out when she was done. Persistence is the key. The more you show how much it bothers you, the longer it will go on. Terrible three's are much worse than two's if you ask me. It gets better! good luck!!
2006-10-24 11:25:50 · answer #8 · answered by purpledragonflyjrh 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I tell my 4 yr old, that if she doesnt want water, than she's not really thirsty. Then I fix her a glass of water, sit it on the table and leave it. When she's finished objecting,(while I'm ignoring, btw) she usually drinks it. Don't give in:)
Good Luck and God Bless
2006-10-24 12:23:45 · answer #9 · answered by patty m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Every time he has a tantrum then send him to his room, There's
No But!!. He needs to learn every time he acts up your not going
to tolerate his behavior. Let him know that he is to stay in his room without playing with his toys, because if you catch him play-
ing then his toys it will be taken out of his room. Keep talking to him he'll learn that if he ask up then he'll get punished and sent to his room. You never want to send him to his room without explaining to him why he's been sent there. Never treat him for
being good, cause he'll catch on ,then expect to get a treat every
time he is good. Getting a treat should be just because, not to
show him to be good. Because the moment he finishes that treat
he'll be his old self again. My Grand-daughters does the same
thing one child is 3 and the other is 10 months. The 3 yr. old
act up and she is sent to her room every time, there no buts.
My 10 month grand-daughter is watching her older sister so she
started throwing her little tantrum. We see every time time her
old sister is acting up she is just stairing, then thats when she
is learning the facts of being a brat with a tantrum. Try it and see
don't give in, cause he get you everytime.
2006-10-24 11:38:30 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boys seem to skip the terrible twos but make up for it in the three's. I would suggest that you be consistent. Do not give in to the fits, they will stop sooner or later. He knows how to push your buttons.
If you don't want to have to listen or watch the fit find a place for him to go, like a time out area or he can go to his room. As long as you don't give in, he will start to understand that his fits don't get him anywhere. Good luck and be patient
2006-10-24 11:18:39 · answer #11 · answered by sharing 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋