What is a good confidence builder for a kindergartener?

Question

Besides sports....what are some things I could get my 5 year old into to build his confidence. He is not confident at school and won't raise his hand to answer questions. Plus, he is now playing by himself and not interacting with the other kids.

Or, what are some things that I could do at home to help him.

Answer 1

There are several things you can do. I have had some very shy and unconfident children in my preschool/kindergarten classroom and the techniques I use work very well and boosting self-confidence and getting them to come out of their shell.

Start off by doing some role playing with him. Play that you are the teacher and he is the student. Try and ask questions where he cannot give a simple yes or no answer. When you ask him a question, say nothing else. Wait until he responds. Try and find out the teacher’s lesson plans. Read some books with him or give him some information of your own about the teacher’s topic. If he has some information about the topic before the teacher introduces it, he may feel more inclined to raise his hand.

I suggest you arrange some play dates with his peers. If he has experience one on one and with small groups at home, he should feel more confident joining in with them at school. You could also arrange a carpool with another child. If he is dropped off at school with another child, he will feel a certain bond with them before school and may join in with them when he is at school.

Stop saying "Good job!" Saying "good job" is an extrinsic motivator. If you are a parent who says "good job," your son will only care what others think about them instead of caring what he thinks about himself. Instead, say things like "You did that by yourself! You can run super fast! Look how high you can climb! You worked on that for a long time! You used so many colors on you picture!" These phrases are GREAT confidence builders! Check out this great article. http://www.alfiekohn.org/parenting/gj.ht... I do this as a teacher, and I see amazing results in my students when it comes to building self-confidence!

Offering choices also helps boost self-confidence. "Should we have chicken or pasta for dinner? Should we walk or ride bikes to the park? Do you want to wear the green shirt or the blue one?" Children who are offered choices feel very powerful.

Have him help with "adult type" activities. Your child can help you with dinner, making snacks, cleanup, or shopping for groceries. He’ll love it!

By using these techniques, children will become very self-confident in no time! Hope this helps!

Answer 2

We had a very similar issue with our daughter. What we came up with at first were sort of like baby steps. We started letting her choose what she wanted to wear to school. Yes, that even meant sandles in the winter, but she felt more confident once she got to wear what she liked, even if I thought it might be crazy. We also let her make decisions about her lunch, then it was on to slightly bigger decisions, like ok today you have three choices, we can have reading time, play a board game or watch a video. Letting her have choices, (not total control) made her feel better about her self and knowing that we would support her choice helped. We would also talk about good choices and why another choice might not be the best at that time.

She is 12 now and involved in drama club, scouts, gymnastics and volunteering at the local animal shelter.

We learned that the things we could do to help with self confidence didn't have to be big or expensive. It was the little things that mattered.

Good Luck! I hope you get some great answers here and can find what works for your child!

Have a good day!

Answer 3

He is probably shy. I have a 5 year old sister and this happened during her first weeks at school. You should take him out to the park more often and let him interact with other children.
Tell him that he is very smart, and is a special boy.

Answer 4

Talk to his teacher. Hopefully there are things that she can do to help. She can help to encourage him to be included in things at recess. She can single him out for special jobs in the classroom such as "Calendar person" or "mail" or running things to the office. Maybe these things can help to make him feel special and boost his confidence.

Praise him when he does well. Let him know you think he is smart and special. Have him tell you what he thinks he is good at. Each night before bed, lay down with him and talk about his day. Tell him something that he did and say something like, "I like the way you....." or "I bet it made you proud when....."

Answer 5

ask him to do simple tasks, whether tht be helping you with the dinner or tidying or perhaps helping him to read or do another activity like that. then when he does it praise him and perhaps if he does it really well give him a small candy bar. as he learns that when he does something well he'll get praised, he'll do more things to get recognised by.