Everything was fine the week before, we were in touch as usual (we usually txt each other everyday) and we're very close. She txt saying how she couldn't even touch another bloke when she went clubbing on Saturday. Said she didn't know what was going on with herself. When I asked her to meet up this evening for a quick drink she said no. Then she said she wasn't sure when we'd meet again and that she'll get in touch. I asked what the matter was, she told me that she's got a lot on her mind and don’t want me to contact her. We didn't argue or fall out over anything.
What’s going on with her? This has really surprised me!
Advice greatly appreciated
2006-10-23 23:56:48 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
P.s. thought this might help. We have kissed once, but she decided just to remain friends (I respected her decision and we've remained close friends). Everytime I mention a girl that I'm interested in she changes the subject straight away and does not seem comfortable with me telling her who I'm interested in (no dirty/sexual info). Also she always tells me that she’s not after any other blokes or that she didn’t pull anyone when she goes out.
2006-10-23 23:57:06 · update #1
She's told me that its not another bloke-she made that quite clear to me.
2006-10-24 00:26:25 · update #2
it sounds to me like she has developed feeling for you and just wants to either adjust to them or sorry to say this, get rid of them.
its the hardest thing in the world when you find yourself falling for a friend, on one hand you know how much of a great couple you'll be but on the other is the fear of it all going wrong and ruining a great friendship.
respect her wishes and take a step back give her the ood msg just to remind her you're thinking of her and wait until shes ready.
2006-10-24 00:22:27 · answer #1 · answered by clutterbug84 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Woman need attention, sometimes Mr Right is just not there and a male close friend can compensate. Then she gets attention from someone else that is new, unknown and this is exiting. Now she has the problem of you the friend that was there when needed.
You are like a back up darling. She probably don't mean to avoid you, this shows she cares for your feelings but as a friend because if you were more she would not have found someone else to replace you.
You will always be her friend if you like but please if only for your own sanity don't kiss her and don't play the back up part. Test this by letting her know you have someone your interested in and if it is ok for you two to see other people. She might be relieved and agree. The answer will tell you where you stand.
Good luck
2006-10-24 00:13:54 · answer #2 · answered by Susanna G 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems to me this girl must of met somebody, as that is the only reason why she wouldn't want any further contact with you until she is ready. Which IMHO equates to " i wanna see how things go with this person Ive met and don't need the hassle of a man friend that may make my new Boyfriend/Lover jealous "
She also may be worried that you might ' try it on again' and the thought of that makes her uneasy as she really doesn't want a close/sexual relationship with you.
Also i must add that she isn't really much of a mate if she now doesn't want anything more to do with you, without actually giving her reasons. It seems she feels your friendship has run its course and she doesn't want anymore to do with you unless she gets lonely or bored, which means she is also a bit of a user. So if you ask me my friend she ain't worth bothering with and just move on and find new friends or spend more time with your existing friends. Ive had similar things happen to me in the past with girls who are 'friends'.. they haven't actually said they don't want anymore contact with me but they have ALWAYS acted differently when they've met a new boyfriend. Ive now come to the conclusion that you CANT have a girl as a close friend as it's normally more hassle that its worth and there will always be one of you that will want more than friendship.
2006-10-24 00:37:44 · answer #3 · answered by I.P. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like she has met a guy she likes and in order not to scare him away she is keeping you at a distance, this has happened to me before i was very good friends with this female just like you, and then one evening i phoned and said is it ok to stop by and she said NO no reason or nothing just no this went on for a while and in the end it emerged that she had started dating a guy, not that i was bothered she had 3 kids then and at 18 that was something i didnt want to get involved in.
But it sure sounds to me that the same thing has happened in your case. So if you only like her as a friend then dont worry about it, and try as hard as you can not to judge her guy in the way he treats her and stuff as yuo will be giving out the wrong signals (ive done this as well) she has to discover for herself how she feels for him and not to be making her decision based on what you think (if that makes sense)
Also the final piece of advise I can give came from a women who I worked for she was about 55 and told me "dont try to figure out women cos they cant even figure thereselves out" or words to that effect.
Take it easy dude
2006-10-24 00:30:38 · answer #4 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she probably has got a lot on her mind. Maybe the kiss confused her who can tell. All you can do is back right off and wait and see if she wants to contact you. If she does contact you then take it easy with her.
I know this will be hard because you obviously care about her but you've just got to let her get on with things.
I had a similar situation a few years back and I bided my time. I've been married to him for 4 years now!
2006-10-24 00:05:43 · answer #5 · answered by Nedster 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
u sound like a caring guy and obviously worried about this girl...
u need to find out why she feels like this....
it sounds like there is something more serious...like a personal health problem that could be making her be the way she is....
*Plz forgive us women.....sometimes this can be a sign to say plz come and give me a hug without saying anything....
Plz just hold me and don't ask me anything bcus i am afraid and alone....*
why don't u tell her that u don't expect her to explain but u r there for her no matter what and if she needs a hug or someone to talk to then u will be there for her.....
I hpe this helps...
Good luck!!
2006-10-24 00:50:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she really likes you but is scared either that you dont feel the same or that she will end up getting hurt!She obviously feels that if you stop all contact for now she might be able to sort her head out and stop feeling the way she is about you!!Some times if you really like someone and you think they dont have the same feelings it makes it easier to stop contact!Ask your self how you really feel about her??Do you like her in that way coz if you do it sound like you should let her no!! x
2006-10-24 00:04:11 · answer #7 · answered by jo 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as if she has romantic feelings for you and she is confused...she might think if you both get together you could ruin your friendship..figure out how you feel about her and tell her..maybe you could date for a while and if it doesnt feel right stick to being friends.
2006-10-24 00:09:03 · answer #8 · answered by fajita 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you want us to tell you she's madly in love with you but don't jump to any conclusions!!!!
everyone needs a bit of time and space to themselves now and again. also she might be thinking what i'm thinking which is your hanging around hoping she'll change her mind. not trying to offend you just hat i think. good luck.
2006-10-24 00:13:37 · answer #9 · answered by raymond m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
text her one more time just saying you know where i am if you need me,leave her to work it out for herself, it might be she is confuse about her own sexuality only she can work it out don't push her at all. good luck hope you get the result that makes you both happy.
2006-10-24 00:08:15 · answer #10 · answered by twinsters 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋