I am 24 years old guy. i have been with a gal (3 years elder than me) for last 1 year.I introduced her with family but my family is not accepting her because she is of different religion and she is not beautiful.(they dont know abt age diff yet). i can not leave my family because they depend on me and they have done a lot for me. i am totally confused. Me and my friend are in same company and earning a good salary. Please suggest me what i should do. i cant marry her right now because my elder brother is still unmarried. So i have to wait for 3 years but it is her age to marry.
Please suggest me what we should do and dont play with my feelings.
2006-10-23 19:45:25 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
It is a tough situation....it is hard to manage both sides.But if you are the one who prefers the family and who easily gets affected by the family members (your message implies it) , there is no chance for your girlfriend....if you love her and feel ready to commit , then without leaving your family and ending your financial support you can declare your independence. I do not think they will disown you when you do that, right??? Good luck to you...
2006-10-23 19:50:53 · answer #1 · answered by Fleur de lis 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The age difference is small and has no importance. If you and her have no problem with the religion, go ahead and marry. Don't wait another 3 years, she is old enough to get married and it is important, because I suppose you want kids. She will have no problem to have kids in 3 years, but I don't see why she must wait for your brother! These things sound to us totally absurd, like your brother depends on you?!People like you can change these social prejudices. It used to be like this here in the '50s, but young people changed it by just getting married to the person they loved, since you are also financially emancipated!
2006-10-23 19:53:42 · answer #2 · answered by cpinatsi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your family seems manipulative and you seem to have a weak ego. I am guessing that your family will pressure you to behave the way they want for the rest of your life.
You have a choice to make - whether you will live the life your family wants you to, or whether to live your own life. There is no right or wrong, but there is comfort and pain in either decision.
I have found that if one stays true to oneself and chooses the path toward his own honest fulfillment, that any pain that results is temporary; and the rewards are great.
2006-10-23 19:56:30 · answer #3 · answered by Ecks 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ya it is a Hard decision to make .But again u have to take the right decision whether to go with ur family's decision or ur decision.The choice is hard to make between the family and the girlfriend but u need to be tougher on any one side.It is not possible to sail on two boats simultaneously at a time.I feel u should go with ur family's decision since they know what is right and what is wrong for u.And I would not make u guilty too!!Again the decision is urs
2006-10-25 18:17:43 · answer #4 · answered by workplace I 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just need to stand up for your self.Tell them she has accepted our religion why can we not accept hers. Tell them they are not showing there religion right if they want to prove that there(your relgion is right then then they should accept her) If they can not do this then they are not accepting you for who you are. You are going to marry her weather they like it or not. Because she is not marring the family she is marring me. Tell them that you do not want this to become between the family but if it has to then it has too. Try to be nice about it. I think you family is being rude they should be happy that you found someone that you love and she loves you.
I hope this helps you.
2006-10-23 19:53:07 · answer #5 · answered by knowssignlanguage 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do you have to wait for your brother to get married first? As for suporting your family, can your girlfriend live you after you get married?
2006-10-23 19:49:54 · answer #6 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do you love her? you obviously don't live in America. this is a hard one.
2006-10-23 19:52:06 · answer #7 · answered by Nikki B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋