Ok, so here's the deal, I have been with this guy for about a month; I've known him for 3. He told me he did not smoke, and that he drank, but occasionally. Last week he told me he had lied, and that he loved getting wasted, and smoked occasionally. He knows I hate smoking, and that I can't tolerate lies. I am gratified he told me the truth, but angry because he thought he had to lie to me for me to like him. I mean, common, why would I drop him cuz he smokes if I already like him??? Anyways, I want to know if he is (1) Telling me the truth because he cares about me and really likes me, (2) Lying to get me to leave him (3) Trying to get me to trust him well enough that I have sex with him, (4) or I am just thinking too much about it, and he's just trying to make sure things work out between us. . .
Please help!!!
2006-10-23 17:45:38 · 12 answers · asked by Marisela S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
sounds liek it might be a mix of all 4, so heres how to narrow it down, if he really smoked, youd smell it on him, next tiem your close to him, sniff his colar slightly, kiss him and see if he "tastes" liek smoke, if he dosnt then hes lieing, smokers smell like it, or if they changed shirts, they still taste it. look at his body language, does he seem like maybe hes not inot you? go to a resteraunt, watch out of your periferalls for him looking at other women, not glances mind you but long. hard stares. does he seem like hes more physical then emotionaly attracted to you, once again body language. adn if noe of the other things turn up, ask youself about past relatinships, adn if you were hurt. you could have a sense of fear and loathing out of simple worries, which is perfectly human to fear that. thats all i got, good luck.
2006-10-23 17:52:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Chances are more likely than not hes playing you . Granted I dont know the whole story but it sounds familier Any relationship should be based on honesty and trust . Yours sounds wanting in both . If I were you I;d cut my losses and walk . Look for someone who will tell you the truth in all things from the begining . I wish you luck
2006-10-23 17:55:38 · answer #2 · answered by Peace of Mind 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why in the hell do you only want guys to help you? Anyway, dump the bastard. You just said yourself you don't tolerate liars, well, obviously you do if you're still with him. If you stay with him you just opened the door for him to lie about everything. And he will. Because you will always come up with some stupid reason why it was okay for him to lie. There are millions of other men in this world that don't lie you know.
2006-10-23 18:01:07 · answer #3 · answered by shakia27 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I would choose 4 but only the part about you thinking too much. Look, it sounds to me like this guy is a miss match for you, & he knows it. He's manupulating you into a relationship with him. Of course he's into you. But are you so desperate, & needy that you are willing to settle for a manipulative liar, just because he likes you, & wants to make it work with you?
If you are so intollerant of lies, then why are you going out of your way to accomodate him?
Girl, pull your self-respect back out of your bottom drawer, & put it back on.
There's a guy that's right for you out there. It just isn't him.
2006-10-23 17:56:17 · answer #4 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once a liar always a liar. He's broken your trust from the start, that's got to get your alarm bells ringing right? Who knows what other rubbish he's lied to you about. I reckon you should just leave him while you have the chance. before its too hard later down the track.
2006-10-23 17:50:54 · answer #5 · answered by exaluva 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask yourself if you are okay with being lied to. What else could he have lied to you about?
Honesty is needed for any relationship to work.
Move on, he is only going to hurt you.
2006-10-23 18:16:31 · answer #6 · answered by Axeman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he's lying about little stuff like drinking and smoking, he'll lie about bigger stuff down the road like drugs, finances, and cheating
2006-10-23 18:02:35 · answer #7 · answered by Smith Jerrod 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
(4)...your are just thinking too much about it. Don't make a mountain out of a mole hill.
2006-10-23 17:48:58 · answer #8 · answered by CJBig 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u really like him and feel the connection between the both of u then go with the flow :)
2006-10-23 17:52:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i think u should ask himif he likes u or not. if not dont make it to big of a deal.
2006-10-23 17:48:36 · answer #10 · answered by monkey b 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋