Should I change my name?

Question

I have a professional degree (law), but I have not yet entered the profession. My concern is that changing my name will separate me from my license (even if I change that) and my education.

My other concern is that if I do not change my name, it will be confusing when I have children. Hyphenating is NOT an option.

Answer 1

I just got married. I am finishing my graduate degree. I have a son from a previous marriage in which I kept that name for the sake of my son. Which do I chose to do?

I will be changing my name because I plan to have other children. My husband does not particularly care and I just happen to think that it has a way of cementing our relationship particularly with future children in the picture.

While you may have your other name on previous education, moving your maiden name to your middle name is not a bad idea.

You remain the same person both professionally and personally. So why not just do what you want to do. If you like taking your husband's name, just do it.

People change their name for lots of reasons. Do it for your own reasons and don't worry about the awkwardness of it.

For years I kept my current name, no one will know my new name...perhaps their will be confusion. But I don't care. My reasons are just that...reasons. I don't want to let it bother me. I would be happy to stick with any name...because it is just a title. All to quickly you will be known for your work. And it doesn't really matter what you name is.

As for kids. Just remember that the name doesn't really matter to them either. Over 50 percent of children are raised in single parent homes. Names that differ from the children are rather common place.

So make your decision based on what you want. Thats what I did...and I am happy with it.

Answer 2

The reasons you just gave are the reasons for changing. They are why I did. We did not want to hyphenate, for lots of reasons. My husband said I did not HAVE to take his name, but if I didn't - he was willing to take mine - just so the family would have one name.
I am a teacher, so I understand the licensing part. With my certification, as with all professions, they change the listing when you marry if you take another surname, but documents exist in both, so you get a document with your married name. For example, my two degrees are in my maiden name, but that doesn't matter, because the university still recognizes me under my married name. Don't worry about that part.
So, I decided to take my husband's name, and have been very happy with that. Mine and his were both "ethnic" names, close in length, so it was not a matter of which name was better or easier. I feel proud that I have taken his last name.
Now as I said I am a teacher, and want to comment in regard to students. Kids now have both parents' names, one parent's name, no parent's name, a totally different name. This is absolutely crazy for the kids. They lose a bit of their sense of belonging when there is not a cohesive family name. I think it is best, when you are planning on having children, to have one surname shared by parents and children. This also helps with passports and foreign travel.
Talk with your fiance and see how he feels. Remember that your name does not define you, anyway.

Answer 3

I had a friend who started changing her name "professionally" as she needed to publish before she got married. I htough that was an awesome idea.

Solved some of this issue. I dropped my maiden name to a second middle name and write out my whole name if ever the is a question. I have not been seperated from my educational records so it shouldnot be a problem.

Answer 4

Change your name. Unless you have more compelling reasons, you should change your name.

My husband was my orientation leader in law school; everyone we know is a lawyer. Changing your name will not separate you from your license or your education. I know plenty of lawyers who changed their names after practicing and after having children. So you do it later too.

When you have kids, people will constantly assume you are divorced, a step mother, a nanny, and many other things. Plenty of people deal with it, but it is a pain. In the end I think it looks like you care more about your professional identity than your identity as a member of your family.

Answer 5

i think you're thinking to hard on the subject. at this point in your life you dont yet have children, also you havent entered into your profession to be.. so it wouldnt exactly seperate you because if you choose to change it you'll start off fresh with a new name as well as a new profession. its not like you've been it for a long time and your name is known. whatever you choose to do, my best to you and congrats on the marriage.

Answer 6

Professional women have been leaving their names (which btw is your fathers name), alone when it comes to their profession and using their married name for everything else for decades.

Ms White, Attorney at Law, and Mrs. Black, Den Mother.

Frankly I've never understood why women are so adamant about keeping their fathers name.

Answer 7

Change your name, you want to have the same last name as your children dont you??? It won't be that much of a burden to swith your name on documents and what not.... I think that you should take your husbands name and have a perfect, happy, lovely family with all the same last name, like a family.

Answer 8

I do not believe this should affect your education or your law degree. It will just be under your maiden name. Married women change their names eveyday in Amreica. I do not undestand why hyphenating is not an option. Good luck and God bless

Answer 9

Which is more important, children or education? that's ur decision. I'd go 4 education b/c if ur educated u can get a better job to support urself when u have children. ir u could tell the people who r in charge of licenses that u r going to change ur name they will compromise im sure. or u could wait till ur name changes b4 u get ur license. if none of those work then idk what to tell u. I tried.

Answer 10

I have kept my maiden name only because it's a hassle over here to change it to my hubby's name. For example, my passport, I.D Card, Driver's Licence, my dental practice etc..... Some people call me by my husband's name and others by my maiden name and I'm fine by it. Children will assume your husband's name though.