I sometimes think that I think too much. It keeps me from enjoying things sometimes. I'm always second guessing myself and weighing options. Why can't I just enjoy life like other people?
2006-10-23 09:31:53 · 7 answers · asked by MAB 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Say for instance I had sex for the first time and it was great, but now I'm wondering if I should have done it. Was it a bad thing? Do I keep on or does that make the "no connections" relationship not work?
2006-10-23 09:49:46 · update #1
Please, don't assume that there isn't pain behind someone's brilliant white smile. That's the first thing. It sounds like you are comparing yourself to some mental image that you have of other people. You have a picture of you, and a picture of another person and you compare and measure. Then when you come out short, you get to feel bad about yourself. When you come out ahead you feel good because you are better than someone else. This is really not a good setup because you will always feel bad at some point.
Practice making decisions, even small ones, like ordering food at a restaurant. You think that you can make wrong choices and then you second guess yourself and feel insecure and bad. What if your choices were just being happy, or being unhappy and everything else in between really didn't matter that much. That simplifies making choices.
In the end, most of us are preoccupied by thoughts because deep inside we are really afraid of joining with people on a deeper level. We fear that they may see something in us that is not good, because we fear we are not good. These are the thoughts that need to be raised to awareness, otherwise they just keep coming back. When the thoughts come in, when you are with someone in a situation and you start to feel that mind energy, busy energy, coming on - practice listening to that person. Give them all of your attention. You may feel very uncomfortable with this at first but if you keep doing it, eventually it will let go and subside.
Another help for quieting the mind is limiting distractions like watching TV, listening to talk radio, internet surfing, video games, and other things that put your mind into a fizzy kind of dreamlike state.
Meditation may also be helpful for you. Vipasssana meditation is very good, as is meditation that focuses on the breath. There are many resources available for both of these. Good luck.
2006-10-23 09:42:15 · answer #1 · answered by ineeddonothing 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can try getting a meditation tape. Do it a few times to get used to it, so then you can do it anytime anywhere without the tape. I have a happy place that I visualize when I need to quiet my mind or de stress myself. It also helps with the second guessing so you can learn to listen to your gut and not be afraid of making decisions. Good luck! It may take a little practice.
2006-10-23 09:43:13 · answer #2 · answered by lolasmommy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it seems that you are sensitive , suspecious person that cares about others and how will they think about him . if you believe that this is your truth , you should do what i am going to tell you , first it needs a kind of training , and it will not disappear in one day , so you should be patient , you need to behave with your nature without hesitating , do things as you believe just directly and accept the result what ever it is , dont care about others too much , try to trust your self more and just be your self not to try to be as the shape that will make others like you . it will take time , you will face some problems but at the end ( may be one month or two ) you will be so ok .
2006-10-23 10:22:15 · answer #3 · answered by mohammad s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I used to have the same problem with you...only a bit different. I used to have a journal..and i wrote down everything that happened to me for the day. It's my way of "capturing the moment" so I wrote down even my angsts and worries. Then, I noticed that I am missing on fun because I'm preoccupied with my writing. So I decided to stop writing and start making memories instead. I'll just go back to my writing in my twilight years.
2006-10-23 09:42:52 · answer #4 · answered by dolly m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't think too much, but you may be stuck on putting things on scales. Go to the place where intuition comes from, and you will begin to see things in a new perspective.
2006-10-23 09:42:09 · answer #5 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I invite my good friend MaryJane over and we get through my problems together.
2006-10-23 10:17:32 · answer #6 · answered by baybeegrl5 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go to a quiet place such as a park or church. meditate. go to holisticonline.com. they'll teach you about this.
2006-10-23 10:14:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋