Though i'm not ready to get married, my bf is pushing for it, and the issue of weddings has been a hot topic among my family lately. My mom is a Christian, attends church regularly, etc. And when I brought up the issue of how, in the future, i'd probably rather avoid all the expense and drama of a wedding, and get married at the Court House, she said that was wrong, and that if you are going to be married, and believe in God, you should be married by a Minister. While I am by no means perfect...and my relationship with God is not where it should be, I still believe in God, and would like to do things the right way. Is my mother right, in that I should be married by a minister instead of at the Court House by a JOP, or is she simply wanting what many mothers want, in seeing their daughters come down the aisle in the white dress? I'm the only girl, and I don't want to disappoint her. I also want my marriage to have the right foundation, in the Lord. Is she correct?
2006-10-23 08:35:17 · 8 answers · asked by LibraT 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Christians and Civil Marriage Laws.
At the present time, in most lands of the earth, marriage is governed by laws of the civil authorities, “Caesar,” and the Christian should normally comply with these. (Mt 22:21) The Bible record nowhere sets out the requirement of a religious ceremony or the services of a clergyman. According to the arrangement in Bible times, the requirement would consistently be that a marriage be legalized according to the laws of the land and that marriages and births be registered where such a provision is made by law. Since the “Caesar” governments exercise such control of marriage, the Christian would be obliged to apply to them for the legalizing of a marriage.
In most lands a couple may marry in a private ceremony that fulfills legal requirements. If a couple chose such a ceremony, others should not criticize them or think that they must be ashamed of something. It could simply be their preference and might even have very real advantages, for example, economically.
2006-10-23 09:22:35 · answer #1 · answered by BJ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, no...she is not right. Truth is that without the law you could not be married. A minister may perform a ceremony but if you get married at a court house or by JOP it cuts out the middle man.
I think it is all up to what you want. It is your wedding and your marriage and your relationship. Do what YOU want. Especially if it makes you happy. You can always have a reception that is more "normal and traditional" if that's what you want.
2006-10-23 15:38:08 · answer #2 · answered by randomidentification 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps when the time comes you can come to a compromise of sorts & get married by a minister at home- or somewhere not in church-- outdoor weddings are beautiful! (we got married in an art museum)... my sister got married in a beautiful old mansion she rented for the cermony & the reception, but the event was still small.
IF you feel you need to please her or want some spiritual part of the wedding, a nondenominational minister or a Unitarian minister might be a good fit for you.
We both had small events & ministers that knew we wanted modern simple ceremonies.
You will find the right thing when the time comes.
2006-10-23 15:49:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing in the bible that states that you have to get married by a minister vs. a JOP. However, you should go through premarital counseling. Hope this helps.
2006-10-23 16:16:19 · answer #4 · answered by wisdom3126 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get married whereever u want. U need to get a marrige license anyway why not do it there. Anyway u can do a small church ceremony to please the mom. It doesn't have to have millions of people, flowers, and food. A small dinner after word would be fine too.
2006-10-23 15:39:41 · answer #5 · answered by missgigglebunny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe to be married i the eyes of god you must be married in a house of the lord.
2006-10-23 15:41:15 · answer #6 · answered by staci m 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The religious ceremony is only that, a ceremony, with all it's pomp and that. You are not legally married until you sign the register and it is recorded legally.
2006-10-23 15:41:53 · answer #7 · answered by whyme? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
IT'S YOUR WEDDING, not your mom's. YOUR day, YOUR choice.
2006-10-23 15:37:45 · answer #8 · answered by CrankyYankee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋