As a mother how would you feel if your teenage son or daughter said to you they wish you would have aborted?

Question

them at pregnancy? What would you say to them if they told you that you were a terrible mother that is the scum of the earth?

Answer 1

My kids aren't teenagers yet, and we all know how rebellious teens can be -- so the comment about being a terrible mom I wouldn't take too seriously. My 9 year old tells me "I'm the worst" sometimes when I say "no". I think many of us have "disliked" our parents at one point in our growing up.

However, the comment about basically wishing they had never been born is more bothersome. My immediate thought was, "is he or she possibly suffering from depression?". I am not a doctor, but I have suffered from, and been treated for, depression, so I have a bit of knowledge. I would contact your family doctor and talk to him/her about it and any other possible symptoms your daughter/son may be displaying. Google "teen depression" -- there's tons of information available.

If communication is generally good between you and your son/daughter (or is it heated much of the time?), have a talk about their feelings...but don't substitute it for the doctor.

They may be just "mouthing off" and trying to hurt your feelings. It depends if they are displaying other symptoms and for how long.

Depression is nothing to mess with, and can be easily missed. I used to slough off comments like that your son/daughter made, but "having been there", I don't take those comments lightly anymore. I'd rather err on the side of caution. Good luck.

Answer 2

I think maybe this would make me stop and think quickly. First of all I have no clue what the whole situation with your question. My question would be to myself is "Why?" Why would my son/daughter say something like this? Is there tension at school? Work? Home? Why? If so there maybe something seriously wrong with what is happening there. You need to first find out is this an attention getting statement. If so You need to find out WHY they are trying to get your attention. You need to stop watching tv, doing the dishes, paying the bills for a second and really listen. Because if this is a cry for help you need to be the parent and find out how. I wish I could give you a better answer, but I don't know the whole story. It sounds to me that there is a lot of anger (hence the scum of the earth statement)And also that the teenager in general is feeling totally worthless(the you should have aborted me statement) To me it sounds like some good family counciling needs to be given so that way communication can open up and start working again without hostile statements and put downs on the teenagers part. Again hope this helps.

Answer 3

What teenage kid doesn't say that or something like that sometime in their life as a teenager? It's quite common.

Since I don't know you I have no inkling what type of mother you are. I would have never had said that kind of thing to my mother, not because she was a saint but because she used to beat us bloody (literally) for no other reason than that it suit her mood at the time. I wasn't about to give her a legitimate reason to beat me, I might not have survived her fury.

Answer 4

Realize that they're a teenager with raging hormonal imbalances, that they feel one way one day and another way the next. Laugh and shrug it off. And try to be a better mother (whatever that means). Let them see you as a human being that also has feelings. Cry. That ought to do it.

Answer 5

At least they are talking to you! You know they don't mean it! At this point, the first one to shout loses. Keep your cool and say, "Oh, I'm sorry you feel that way. Can you explain that in more detail?" Then when they finish ask for further clarification. Reiterate their arguments from different points of view, saying, "Do I understand you correctly?" Keep talking until you both understand each other, and let them know you love them, unconditionally.

Answer 6

I would get counceling for her. Kids have it rough these days and say some terrible things, I'm sure your not a bad mother at all!! They know how to really hurt at this age

Answer 7

Kids just say that crap trying to be manipulative. What, is he mad because you would not let him get a tattoo or something? Trust me, he will get over it. Whatever the situation, don't give in. You stand your ground no matter what sort of nasty little comments they make. They don't mean what they say, they are just being childish. Ignore it.

Answer 8

well I'd hope my kids had more respect for me then to mouth off like that. Next I'd tell them when they get pregnant they can choose what to do, until then they have to live with the choices I made. I'd relies teens are emotional hormonal brats they tend to get bent outta shape easy. In the end i would not take it to heart they are just blowing off steam and will regret acting that way when they are older.

Answer 9

you may desire to make certain in case you probably did all those issues for him or did you do them for you. i think of you probably did them for him so which you may desire to allow pass of the undesirable me attitude. on the different hand, you are the determine and you deserve his finished admire and cooperation. for this reason some distance you spoiled him with quite some cloth issues and an high priced training at a private college. My daughter had anger matters whilst she grew to become into in her early young ones yet by way of the time she grew to become into 15 she grew to become into as candy as candy ought to be. We stopped micro-handling her life yet gave her much less attackable self-discipline whilst she broke the less policies she had.

Answer 10

just tell them you love them and the day they were born was the best day in your life..I remember being like that as a teen. I just wanted to know I was loved...I am 30 now and have a great relationship with my parents.