That you lied to him when you said you had a miscarriage and now two years later have a son by him?I lied because he dumped me while i was pregnant not wanting to be a parent and i was angry with him.
2006-10-23 07:36:57 · 28 answers · asked by Morgan R 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There are no words to describe you hun. Get therapy. That s..t isn't even cool
2006-10-23 07:38:17 · answer #1 · answered by legallybrunette510 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK Im gonna skip the lectures you know you messed up and are willing to TRY to fix this
say exactly what you just said here. Then add
That you were angry and young and not so smart and you are sorry but you made a bad choice by NOT telling him and would he like to be a part of his childs life. Tell him you were hurt and confused and scared alone all that stuff you probably were feeling at the time. ( remember he may be feeling all those when you tell him)
just open the conversation by saying some of this then a SINCERE apology then take it from there he may react horribly at first....say nasty things want DNA proof and leave but at least you will have tried.
let him cool down a few days then call him and try again. He'll need time to get used to the idea of being a fater....I know you didnt have this luxery but.....thats how it goes. You made a mistake by not telling him and its time to fix it thats all ....for the childs sake as well as both of yours as parents.
I hope you are not telling him so you can seek financial assistance I hope its just because you feel its time to right a wrong. Then maybe you guys can have a decent relationship ....friends supportive parents that kind of thing. A child doesnt need both parents but it sure helps if they are both in his/her life and civil to each other.
2006-10-23 07:44:45 · answer #2 · answered by Coyote 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No matter what your reasons, no person has the right to take that away from another person. He should have been told the day you found out you were pregnant, and never should have been lied to. He has the right to know that he is a father, no matter what kind of person he is.
You need to tell him the truth, all of it. What you did, why you did it, and be prepared for the backlash. He's going to be hurt, angry, confused, scared, excited, probably all of them, all at once.
He is going to be very angry with you, but you need to come clean in an honest, up-front way. Talk to him. In person. Don't beat around the bush, sit him down, and talk to him. Do it in private, and do it NOW.
2006-10-23 07:40:25 · answer #3 · answered by Allycat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest with him. Tell him that you lied about your miscarriage and explain your reasons. It might not turn out so well but at least he will know he has a son. Let him then decide if he wants to be a part of the child's life.
2006-10-23 07:42:42 · answer #4 · answered by Michelle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I must say you did a bad thing. I know you think your reasoning at the time is justified. But since you lied to him, he is not going to believe you. What you need to do, is go to the courthouse in your town and file for child support. Of course he is going to contest to this, that I why I mention filing for child support. Because then you will have a dna test perform and when the test comes out showing he is the father, he can not deny his child. :-)
2006-10-23 07:40:07 · answer #5 · answered by blueeyeskenai 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You dont tell him. He didnt want to be a parent and unprotected sex causing him to become a parent. If you tell him now, he will feel obligated to be a parent but never live up to being a GOOD parent. Dont do that to your child. Most women who go your route, who end up contacting the father who doesnt want to be, are only doing it for selfish personal fufillment. There is nothing wrong with you and you dont need help.
2006-10-23 07:43:09 · answer #6 · answered by buggyroo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whoa! NOT COOL! Nothing you can do about it now. Prepare for DNA testing and expect him to be angry, hurt, resentful and all that. This was an incredibly selfish act on your part and NOW his life is about to be hit with a shocker. All you can do is go see him or better yet place a call and take it from there.
2006-10-23 07:44:43 · answer #7 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow,that's crazy girl,im sure u r gonna get a lot of ridicule from this question,but 1st and foremost i ammend u for atleast having the deceny to ask,and try to fix this problem,however i dont agree with what u did,now as far as what to do,# 1 u know he isnt going to believe u,probably not anyway....so u need to some type of proof,sons birthday,documented,or if possible his dna records,im sure he's gonna want a test,i know i would,but u just have to get in contact with him,and explain,tell him the truth,the truth about everything,why u lied,etc. I pray he is forgiving,and accepts your son in his life,let us know what happens,if i can be more help contact me thru messenger! gl!!!
2006-10-23 07:43:30 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would just go to it and do it. Tell him the truth, but be prepared for him to doubt you this time. He might not believe that the baby is his. I hope you work this out because your child needs a father, and he needs to be a part of his child's life. I understand where you are coming from though. Good luck, I hope it works out for all three of you.
2006-10-23 07:41:15 · answer #9 · answered by june clever 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't have lied in the first place if he is a good person he will take care of the child but he proabaly won't want anything to do with you
2006-10-23 07:39:58 · answer #10 · answered by Smile 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is really wrong...you should tell him right away. It's not fair he has a child out there that he knows nothing about. I don't care if he dumped you 2 years ago or not.
2006-10-23 07:39:53 · answer #11 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋