Regardless of religion or beliefs.... Is it wrong to spank your children?

Question

I personally do not spank... But LIKE ANY NORMAL person there are times when kids just drive you off the wall and you might think about spanking.... do you think is it ever okay? why? how much is too much? Do you think the kids associate this with their bad behavior?

Answer 1

It's not wrong to spank you children for instances of misbehavior. It can be a great disciplinary technique; however, you must remember to use it only when it is warranted, for doing it more than this is being abusive and will have the opposite effect of what you're going for.

Answer 2

Never, never spank because they are getting on your nerves or because they drive you up a wall. If you don't believe in spanking, don't - you will spank for all the wrong reasons.
I do believe some spanking can be a positive thing, but it needs to be done in moderation (I mean not too frequently). If a child is being repeatedly spanked for the same offence, then I think one needs to find out what is causing this.
Spankings should hurt, eitherwise they will just be an irritaiton for the child and there will be no respect. On the other hand, spankings should never do harm.
If the spanking is humiliating (example: in public) that can do harm.
Spankings should be acocmpanied by explanation, and assurance that you care. On the other hand, don't just tell a child you love them when you spank them! They will get a weird idea of what love is all about.
If you spank on the bottom, don't use a hard object. Think: "if I missed, could it harm?" In school we were swatted with a flat stick, hard enough to sting. It was wrong for the following reasons:
1. If the teacher had missed, think of what it would have done to the kidneys.
2. It was often done in formt of the whole class, and was humiliating, especially if the child being spanked broke down and cried.
3. If the child came from a non-spanking background, he (she) could be absolutely paralized with fear.

Answer 3

I have 4 kids. 3 boys, 1 girl. Spanking is a form of discipline used in our household. I have an obligation to help my kids make choices that won't lead them way from God. So far I have spanked my oldest son 3 times (he's 8) and my wife has spanked our daugher 1 time (she's 6). My twins are only 15 months. I would hope they would correlate spanking as a consequence for unacceptable behavior.

I would tell you that spanking is probably harder on the parents.

Answer 4

Sometimes it's the way to get a childs attention.
It's not abuse, unless you fully kick your childs @ss.
A swat on the butt is what some kids need.
If your 5 year old comes home 30 minutes late from a friends, then what is spanking going to prove, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!!
But if your at a picnic, and your child starts throwing a tempertantrum, well the swat the little brat. My parents did it to me.
It's not a question "does spanking teach them a lesson?" no it doesn't, but the point of a swat on the behind, is to get the childs attention, TO teach them the lesson.
If your child is throwing a fit, they don;t listen... unless you give them a reason to listen.
My friend who's parents didn't, are actually quite spoiled and think the worlds comming to an end because mommy and daddy won't give them an extra five bucks, they are 20 years old and STILL throw tempertantrums. Ever want to swat your friend behind because they were acting so childish. It ultimately is your choice, but sometimes it's what they need.
You do the math.

Answer 5

i believe that spanking is okay as long as it is only as a disciplinary action; however, I do not believe in extreme methods like hitting in the face, head or back. There also should never be any extreme result of spanking like broken arms or bruises of any kind. When I have to, I spank my daughter directly on her bottom, no where else. Sometimes it does seem useless because she will do the same things over and over again but then I switch it up and take away her TV or something that she really enjoys and that usually will do the trick.

Answer 6

I know as a kid I deserved my fair share of spankings and slaps across my face. I believe there is a time and place for these types of discipline. I was spanked and I'm fine. I have a teenage girl but, when she was little, I only had to spank her once or twice. After that she never talked back to me or threw a tantrum. It's been about 7 years since then and she's fine. Hope this helps :)

Answer 7

I am a mother of two, one being fourteen who I never spanked, because as a child I was abused and vowed to myself I would never touch my own. My three year old I have spanked quite frequently. Why because to be quiet honest he is more stubborn and liberated. Just for me to punish him with a timeout, I aslo have to threaten a spanking so that he will sit in a timeout, otherwise he will not listen. Some have said consistency and I have had to many times keep putting him in timeout for him to overpower me. The only way I could get him to listen was for him to know the sting of the palm of my hand. So I really think it depends on the child. TO tell you the truth I would rather him understand the consequences of his actions with a spanking instead of him seeing them as something he can bypass. Then he wil take this sort of mentality with him as an adult, and I do not intend for that to happen. I picked the worser of two evils to me that is pretty much what we all have to do in every aspect of life.
I wish you well.

Answer 8

I was abused very badly and I know how it feels like to be spanked. A little spank is fine on the hand or on the bottom for small kids. But always try to use immediate psychological actions against them instead of physical punishment.

Perhaps if they do something that deserves praise you give them ice cream or you bake a nice dessert for them. If they don't, they get grounded immediately or you can ban them from candy for a week for kids. Or no ice cream, or something favorite of theirs. Or no toys and etc...

Always take immediate action and it will become productive.

Answer 9

No. I spank my kids when it's appropriate.
You have appropriate discipline for appropriate ages.
I think you should spank until they are 6 or 7 than you move onto different types of discipline.
My son is 5 now and we have spanked him since he was 1-we hardly ever have to do it now because he is so well behaved. It took five years but it has paid off.
My nieces-their parents do not believe in spanking and I have never seen more disrespectful, non-obeying children in my life.
as the Bible states "spare the rod, spoil the child"

Answer 10

I feel if people think that it is the necessary approach to teaching your kids a lesson, then they should spank them.

I personally don't think I will ever resort to spanking, but what do I know, I'm only 19. We'll see what happens when I get kids.

Answer 11

It is best to plan out what you will do so that you do not have to create options for yourself when you are angry. Plan out ways to discipline children from the moment you become a parent, and review the plan for effectiveness and age-appropriateness regularly.

Spanking is primarily a reflex reaction that can be avoided with proper planning. It teaches children that the most physically powerful will win, and for some kids, this is a dangerous lesson. And at some point, the parent may make an error and slip into the field of child abuse.