how can i stop taking things so personally?

Question

anything that my kids do...like misbehaving or hurting my momma's feelings, i feel that there is something i can do to make them not act like that. anything anyone says to me, i take to heart and usually look more into it. if my momma's depressed, i always think that i did something to make her that way. how can i stop thinking like that? and how can i stop being so paranoid? i always think when i walk into a room that people start talking about me. i'm in counseling, but that isn't helping at all...i'm thinking about getting a new counselor. but in the meantime, what can i do?

Answer 1

Avoid situations with your children and mom until you can find a new counselor. Are you on any antidepressants? No joke, you probably have a disorder that may need medication to get it in check. You should see your family doc and explain whats going on with you mentally and he could refer you to the proper psychologist/psychiatrist for treatment. Dont wait to see your doc, call him today because it sounds like you have a form of depression also and the sooner you get treated the better it will be for you, your children and your mom. Good luck.

Answer 2

Well it isn't easy to stop what has become second nature to you. You may not realize that you have conditioned yourself to have those thoughts.

To stop thinking a certain way is hard work, but the best thing you can do is when you find yourself thinking that way, stop and examine your thought, ask yourself "now what proof do I have that this thought is true" if you can't find any then forget it, put a mental picture there, a brick wall works great but it can be any picture.

What you feel when you enter a room is self conscious and no not everyone is talking or even looking at you, they may glance up to see who has entered the room but they are not looking for you especially it is just human you probably do the same when someone enters a room you are in don't you.

Lastly you have to learn to relax, you are not responsible for everyone's feelings, or actions, just concern yourself with your feelings and your actions. Good luck honey, therapy is very helpful and group therapy helps you to understand that you aren't the only one who suffers through these things.

Answer 3

I have had the same sensitivity problem with myself. It is not your counselor I am sure of that. I am sorry honey but it is you. You need to see that not only is this world hard to live in but did you ever think that maybe you came to this world to overcome the hard stuff? Nothing should be cake and ice cream if it was then what would you have to be greatfull for? What would you learn from? How would you become stronger? You are not the only one in this world that feels the way you do trust me on that one. Just try your hardest and never give up on living your life to the fullest and that means dealing with the bad and there is a **** load of that. If you don't try then you never lived. Anymore question email. Erin

Answer 4

Watch your steps. As you take each step in life make sure that you are representing yourself as the way you want people to see it. This way you are sure you are living the life you want to. Understand that people won't always like the things you do and that is OK!! You can't hold the burdens of other people on yourself- that is too stressful. Let people keep their own monkeys on their own backs. If you are living life that is true to yourself and those around you then there is nothing to be paranoid about. Remember it is hard to change your feelings, it will take time.

Answer 5

Read a couple different books on codependence. It sounds like you have some of that going on. If your counselor isn't helping, try a different one. Therapy is the best way to change the way you see the world, and when that view automatically includes a sense of responsibility for everything, it's not apt to be a perspective you'll succeed in changing all by yourself. Good luck.

PS - it'll also help if you try to notice how often you choose your words and actions to please others instead of just being yourself. I saw that someone else said that you're just too focused on yourself. That may be true, but most likely only in that you have a fundamental way of feeling responsible for controling how others are. To compensate, you do everything to please others while waiting for them to care about you. It's a viscious circle. If this in anyway sounds like you, definitely read up on codependence.

Answer 6

you're in basic terms a of course comfortable man or woman. i'm the comparable way and there is not any longer something incorrect with this. via fact of this it is physically powerful to first settle for it and be useful with the day. interior the morning, placed on music to set a solid temper. something to spice up your self belief and to remind you that it is a clean day; a clean commence - and something is definite to take place. there is not any use living on the previous for that's some thing you are able to't replace. After some thing occurs which you start to get disillusioned approximately, take a deep breath, and replace the unfavorable recommendations with recommendations you will extremely think of approximately. motivate your self for the period of the day and tell your self which you're too solid to be lured into outdoors forces that ruin your day. do no longer pity your self or evaluate your self with different persons. Victimizing your wellbeing is genuinely no longer of any use to you yet in basic terms the thank you to get you pissed off and depressed. you have administration of your existence in all areas. comprehend which you are the grasp of your destiny, no longer continually the sufferer of your situation. Be solid and picture approximately what surprises are waiting for you interior the destiny, in spite of how undesirable the present is affecting you. ultimate of luck.

Answer 7

I was like that growing up too. Just remember that you are thinking about yourself more than other people. Just keep telling yourself that you are a good person. You must have a high emotional quota. It's like an IQ but it's an EQ. Appreciate it for the most part.

http://www.eq.org/cgi/frames.pl?id=185&title=emotional+intelligence+with+career+development

Answer 8

I think you should talk to your medical doctor. My friend is on an anti-depressant called zoloft. She said she knew the medication was working when she quit being OVERLY sensitive. She said she is still sensitive, but appropriately so. When I heard that, I knew I needed it. I just got my prescription but haven't started taking it yet.

Or, go to a psychiatrist. They can prescribe, AND counsel.
Peace.

Answer 9

It sounds like you are just a very sensitive person. Lots of people are that way. You have to train yourself to realize that everything bad that happens to loved ones is not your fault, and most times their is nothing you can do about them.

Answer 10

Its all in your head. You need to stop and think, when you catch yourself thinking that way take a few seconds to reassure yourself. It will take some willpower but eventually changing the way you think will be more natural.