My girlfriend and I have been together for six months. I have cancer and sometimes I fear death so much that I don't think it is fair to her. She is married and planning a divorce for me but they have a two year old son. I could die tommorow and I feel like I am ruining her life because I don't know what my tommorow holds. She is waiting until we can afford to live on our own before she divorces him and I am so afraid that I may be ruining her life. I know she loves me and she doesn't care about the cancer and how long she has with me. It is just that if she had decided to divorce him before we were actually together then I would feel more confident. It is just that she that I love her so much that it breaks my heart sometime.
2006-10-23 02:19:16 · 14 answers · asked by mtjs06 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i can tell you love her as she loves you. she knows the situation as well as you, and since she knows,,,,let her make the decision to be with you or not....regardless of the decision, you both are loving and caring for each other, so if it is meant to happen that you and her are together , it will happen...be strong and take care of yourself the best you can and see what happens...God bless you and your girlfriend...
2006-10-23 02:35:45 · answer #1 · answered by churchonthewayseniors 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Shs isn't going to divorce he husband. Has she told him about you? Probably not. she isn't going to divorce him because if you do die ( which you may live for another 5 10 15 years) she doesn't want to be left alone. So if she doens't get divorce and doens't tell him about you then she doesn't have anything to worry about. Look if she isn't willing to divorce him NOW and marry you before you die (which you won't anytime soon) then she IS NOT worth being with. You need to find someone that is going to be with you NOW. not tomorrow or the next. Love is wantting to be with someone no matter how much money you have to live on. I lvoe my fiancee and we are soooo poor. And also, it will going to cost soooooo much to get divorce. So she will never have money saved up to be with you and divorce him, plus she has a kid. So she will NEVER have money. I understand that you love him, but it seems to me that she DOENS'T love you the same way. I'm very sorry. I hope you figure it all out. And stay well.
2006-10-23 09:27:01 · answer #2 · answered by *~*Ash*~* 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No ones life comes with a guarantee. Not for happiness, not for longevity. You certainly can't go back to the past so you could change things to make you feel more confident. If you and your doctor really feel that your time is that short, then don't encourage her to leave her marriage speedily. Divorces usually take some time, in most states a year, if she wants a divorce, she will get one with, or without you. Do what we all have to do in the end, we have to take one day at a time.
2006-10-23 09:26:55 · answer #3 · answered by justa 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should let her stay with her husband. Although it might break your heart, think about ehr situation. i mean, if she leaves her family for you and you die on her, there is a chance that her husband may always hold that against her and not allow her back in their home and she's left without her husband or son.
2006-10-23 09:21:41 · answer #4 · answered by K G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not ruining her life. She is ruining it for herself. Not to mention the poor child. She is going to change the childs life forever because of her own selfishness. Either way, you are in the clear. Don't feel bad.
2006-10-23 09:23:14 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love her then you should let her stay with her husband, because you know you can't be there for her all the time annd your time is limited, what happens to her when you move on? and her child? she needs to stay and try to work things out with her man. If there is nothing to work out then she needs to leave because she wants to leave not because of you. she needs to think about her child.
2006-10-23 09:48:46 · answer #6 · answered by Smooth1221 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, she is cheating on her husband so whatever she does is actually unfair to him - but that's not my problem.
Does she know you have Cancer? If she knows it and is still willing to go on, then you shouldn't feel guilty, rather rejoyce that someone is willing to go to such extents for you.
2006-10-23 09:34:02 · answer #7 · answered by Marker 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you will break her heart if you call it off, so you will both be heart broke. Live for today, make everyday a happy one. I hope you have looked into treatment, im sure you have.
2006-10-23 09:23:58 · answer #8 · answered by leigha 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should start thinking about getting healthy and beating the Cancer, and let her decide what she wants to do. It isn't right for you to decide for her ya know!!! Prayin for you!!!
2006-10-23 11:07:45 · answer #9 · answered by truepubwench 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would think your oncologist would have given you some time frame about your illness. Then discuss it with her.
2006-10-23 09:24:08 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋