This happened over a year ago, but it's bugging the hell out of me.
My brother lives out of town and this one weekend that he came to visit he brought his new girlfriend and her 4 year old son to visit. My brother's kids were pre-teens and he was taking them to see a horror movie. She just had to go so she left her so to play with mine. Here's my problem. This was the first time she'd met me or my mother and she left her son with us. I don't care who you are I am not going to leave my kid with a stranger. I even make sure to meet my son's teachers before schoo starts. is this a common practice...leaving kids with strangers?
2006-10-23 02:07:52 · 9 answers · asked by prfadfels 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
they had only been together a couple of months.
2006-10-23 02:25:26 · update #1
Personally, unless the person is family, I wouldn't leave my children with anyone (and that's not even every member of my family!).
Playing devil's advocate for a minute, though... how "new" a girlfriend was she at the time? It might have been that she felt that she trusted your brother and he trusted you, so she felt she could trust you. Of course, even in that situation, I wouldn't be trusting anyone with my child unless I had knowledge of them myself, not second hand.
I don't know if it's a common practice. I know it wouldn't happen with us.
2006-10-23 02:22:17 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps she felt she knew you through knowing your brother. If he cares about the child and says you would be good to him and have kids that could play with him, she probably felt pretty secure about it. It really is different then just some stranger because your brother is like your reference - just like you would check a sitter's references. Personally I have never done this but in a similar situation might. I'm sure she at least talked to you a bit before she left.
2006-10-23 02:26:05 · answer #2 · answered by pebble 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you're being a tad up tight. You're a female, you know it's far more safe to leave them with another mother or another female than with a male or someone with no kids. Cut her some slack. If they had been dating for 2 months, then she trusted his judgment and that's ok. Not all people are child predators, stop being so paranoid. Cautious, yes. Paranoid, no. After stepping in and surveying the area, I'm sure she did a mental observation of your atmosphere and found it to be safe for 2 hours of stay. geez.
2006-10-23 02:55:01 · answer #3 · answered by HazelEyes 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it's appropriate. I would not have felt comfortable leaving my child or imposing on my new boyfriends family. Some people don't care though. If I were you I wouldn't allow it to bother you anymore. Let it go and feel pride in yourself that you are a better parent with more elf respect. Sometimes mothering doesn't come naturally to others. Let it go honey, there are probably other things in life to focus your energy on, good luck. : )
2006-10-23 03:47:24 · answer #4 · answered by Michelle Lynn 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm with you. I want to know who my kids are with. Granted, she may have felt that it was ok since you're the "sister-in-law" but I still don't think I could leave my kids with someone I don't personally know.
I guess we're just kind of a strange breed these days. I know several people who don't seem to care who they leave their kids with... and even if they do know, they don't seem to care if these people are taking their kids all over the place!
2006-10-23 02:13:41 · answer #5 · answered by cgspitfire 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
he doubl hockey sticks no. I would never leave my child with someone else i didnt know for at least my whole life. Let alone, i wouldnt take on the responsibility of wathcing over someones chil if i didnt know them, god forbid anything would have happened. I would not be able to live with myself.
2006-10-23 02:56:10 · answer #6 · answered by tsd574 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You were not a stranger.In any case it is a small matter. Look at the damage that would have been done to your own psyche by one year of such hellish self-inflicted bugging.
2006-10-23 02:19:24 · answer #7 · answered by Rajesh Kochhar 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
my mam certainly wouldn't have left me with strangers but i guess if your her boyfriends sister then it might be different ...
2006-10-23 02:27:00 · answer #8 · answered by Charlie V 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't know, we must resist the temptation to judge.
2006-10-23 02:17:17 · answer #9 · answered by Kacky 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋