My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 years. He is a wonderful boyfriend, he loves me very much and we have a great relationship, with one big problem. I always knew that he wanted to finish school before marriage. However, it has been 8 years and he has 2 more years of graduate school. I told him that if I am not engaged by next summer I will move and take our cats with me. I never wanted to be the type to give ultimatums. I know he wants to marry me. He talks about our future wedding like it’s this great adventure. I feel insulted and rejected. Worse yet, my last birthday was an important to me, and he knew it. Not only did he not plan anything, but he got me a gag gift (sweet, but stupid), and that’s IT!!! He meant well (kind of) and I really told him off for it, made him cry, but I still never got a gift, and he never did anything special. What do I do? I love him and don’t want to leave him, but his thoughtlessness just hurts more as time goes by.
2006-10-22 14:20:41 · 6 answers · asked by boggin828 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Thank you all for your input. I have talked to him.... several times over several years. It breaks his heart, but he still does nothing... I'm at a loss.
2006-10-22 14:31:46 · update #1
Tell him what you just told us.
2006-10-22 14:23:52 · answer #1 · answered by MisterO 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all we all have a guy or guys we love and can't be with. So, don't let love keep you there.
The best prediction of the future is the past. Eight years is a very long time to be together and not be married. Why would he want to get married when he has you now without marriage?
If he hurts you now, it will be 10 times worse when you get married. Many people have the illusions that marriage makes things better. It doesn't.
I don't think he takes you seriously. Maybe when you pack up and walk out the door he will.
Why do you stay with him? He isn't giveing you what you need. find a guy who will.
It is very possible that you have chosen the wrong man. Take your cats and move on.
2006-10-22 21:31:47 · answer #2 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Be careful, many people have stood by their lovers while in school and once they graduate they end up moving on in another relationship.
But at the same time you said he always wanted to finish school before marriage so you are going to have to trust your heart on this one.
2006-10-22 21:36:10 · answer #3 · answered by Bubbles 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do talk to him, tell him what your feeling. If your not able to release what your feeling inside, time will come that you will be hurt more because you will lose him permanently. Try to communicate to him, tell him everything that your feeling.
2006-10-22 21:28:42 · answer #4 · answered by pretty girl 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i am truly sorry it had to be this way.If u love him i dont recommend u leave him but u should explain the situation to him,truly.it would bea true shame to let this one go.
2006-10-22 21:25:04 · answer #5 · answered by Barbsss 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
look for the dummies series book , its a good start.
2006-10-22 21:24:37 · answer #6 · answered by philanthropic 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋