I feel like crap. I asked him (my boyfriend) if I could talk to him for a few minutes.. He's been on the computer for at least 15hours now. I'm not exagerating (sp?)... He won't even give me a few minutes.... Then he says he will, but "just a sec"... So I wait behind him..while he's supposedly finishing up with his friends or something... Then he turns around after a minute and tells me he hates it when I just stand behind him waiting.. I mean...WTF??!! He told me "just a sec"... So then I go into the other room and cry audibly..and he doesn't care..he never cares...his friends online and his stupid starcraft games are TONS more important than me.........then he starts talking happily with the stupid dog.... he talks with the DOG... but not me :-( The only times he talks to me is when he wants food or something to drink or to do something else for him... I hate it.... I tried just doing my own thing.. But I just really wanna talk to him but I CANT :'-(
2006-10-22 07:54:29 · 26 answers · asked by abbas_n_chantel 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
plz dont tell me to get rid of my bf. that wont help.
2006-10-22 07:57:03 · update #1
The only good answer is the one you don't want to hear but there may be another one. Here is what you do...
Go to the hardware store and buy the strongest magnet you can find. Take it to a computer and attach it for awhile. This may disrupt things long enough to get the time you need.
2006-10-22 08:20:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Maybe you need a new boyfriend.
It sounds like he does not really love you and like maybe he is trying to push you away.
Sorry, do not mean to be hurtful...
Besides, what do I know I am a guy...
But atleast I try and give my G.F. the time of day...
I cook, clean, and draw the bath water for her when she wants...but I guess I am one of the few, maybe...
Though I am still an assh*le some of the time.
I want to do my thing too and I want my space...But I do allow for together time.
We talk and have a wonderful relationship.
Her boys are often annoying and a pain in the butt, but I do try and get along with them too.
Yeah, talk to your man.
Tell him how you feel, talk to him, 'cause all you can get from us out here is opinions, and ideas that may just make you feel worse.
Maybe you need to just move on...
How long have you been together?
Perhaps this is exactly why you did not get married to him yet, afterall this is the new millenium...
Try it before you ,"BUY", it.
You could pray about it too, that may help.
Is it your house, or his, or are you sharing the expense like most couples?
Can you make it on your own, can you stay with someone else???
Hmmm...
yeah, sorry... men...we are mopstly selfish, selfcentered ,egotistical as*holes...But there are a few who are decent I suppose and the right one is out there for you, you just got to find him.
Or you could do what my girl does and tell him how it is...Get off the dam* computer and ,"GIVE ME SOME QUALITY TIME"!!!
Or...,"If you want to be all sweet to the dog and be an as*hole to me then take you phuckin' dog and get the h*ll out and go live with your stupid friends"!!!
Or you can just continue to take it and feel miserable.
You have to do something cause it just gets worse over time.
Godbless or Goodluck...
Whichever you prefer.
be stern, be realistic, TALK TO HIM AND TELL HIM HOW YOU FEEL.
If he still ignores you, then make a way for you to move on.
Love hurts, letting go may be painful...But being ignored is more painful.
Hope I helped.
2006-10-22 08:15:43 · answer #2 · answered by djyo 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you boyfriend cant make time for you, love yourself enough to make time for yourself. Anyone, anywhere that you feel comfortable enough to talk to, share with that person, atleast until your boyfriend decides to make/take time to talk with you. Notice that I said, talk with you and not at you. Crying any tears of sadness or frustration means more than words can say. You deserve to feel special. You deserve to be heard. Its not how much your boyfriend values you, know your own value. If you dont stand for certain things, you'll fall for anything. I hope that you believe that you deserve better than feeling so meaningless. Why cry for or over anybody that seems so uncaring? Do you think that you deserve to be treated the way that hes treating you or do you know that youre worthy of more than that? Some males think that women are nothing more than chatterboxes, anyway. Talk to him just like you would like to be talked to. Dont use hateful words b/c that only escalates the problem and youll never get to the real issues at hand. Its really hard to complain about the way that someone treats you if you just allow them to get away with behavior. If someone was treating your favorite person in the world like that, would you let them get away with it or would you defend them to the hilt? Its not egotistical to love yourself that same way. You dont want anyone to tell you to leave your boyfriend? No one could/should ever tell you to leave. Thats a decision that only you can make. But you do see where this is heading, right? If you dont get some things straight and you plan on staying with him--its only going to get worse. That, doing your own thing, can end up only making yourself feel worse in the end. You should have your own friends and things that make you feel good about yourself. The most vital thing that you must have is an unconditional, always accepting and forgiving, patient LOVE for YOU. Thats first and foremost. You cant even claim to love somebody else when you dont have a good, healthy strong love for yourself ( as simple or as complexed as you may think you are) You gotta love everything about you and that which you dont, be patient with yourself in the process of changing. You are worth that and so much more.
2006-10-22 08:48:37 · answer #3 · answered by Talia Hart 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah....get rid of your boyfriend. That most definitely WILL help. Your boyfriend is a dumbass who doesn't get it. He is also an addict to the stupid video games, which basically means he is a loser and you should not be with him.
All normal women want the same thing....a strong man who loves them. He is neither of these things and this is the reason you are miserable. Why are you wasting your time with him? I'll tell you why. You feel worthless and are scared you will be alone without him. Well, the only reason you feel worthless is the way he is acting. Get rid of him and get a man with the qualities you want and you won't feel bad anymore.
Strong in this case means a guy who is calm, cool and collected, especially when things go wrong. You can't push his buttons and he doesn't have silly phobias or bad habits (like playing starcrack 24/7 when you are lonely for him). He doesn't accept bad behavior from himself (like humiliating you by ignoring you in favor of the dog) or others. He is always trying to make your life together better and better.
Love means he truly cares about you as a person and is in the relationship for the long term. He pays attention to you and values you. His focus is on your well being and, later, the well being of your children. A man like this won't abandon you, leaving you alone. And your current boyfriend will do exactly that, one day (which is the biggest reason you should get the hell rid of him).
This is what all (normal) women want and you are miserable without this (and make our lives miserable if you don't it, lol). Best advice I can give you is for you to sit your boyfriend down and explain the facts of life to him. Tell him this is the way women are and you, in no uncertain terms, expect him to get with the program. Things like starcraft, other video games and chatting on the internet are in the way so they gots to go. Be sure to let him know that he is out of there unless he gets his act together pretty damn quick.
If he gives you any flak at all, dump him. Plenty of fish in the sea and, although most men are ignorant of this issue, the vast majority of us will HAPPILY give you what you want if you enlighten your new boyfriend and ask for it.
Because, you see, all normal men want the same things. A hot, horny piece of azz at night in the bedroom and nice, loving, good woman during the daytime who is HAPPY because she is with us (warning.....unless you do your part, these are not necessarily the same woman...hehehehe).
I suspect your boyfriend is not normal and this isn't where he is coming from.
Then, why the hell are you with him?
2006-10-22 08:16:52 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You sound like a baby...
Grow up! And I am not saying that to be mean, I'm saying it as a kind of tough love thing.
We as women are so used to standing behind a man and "Waiting" FOR HIM to do or be or say. That is not only disgusting, it is ridiculous!
Trust me sweetie... GO OUT! Get your sh*it, grab some friends and get out of the house... go to a book store, go shopping, take a walk, go to the mall.
#1. God knws what he is doing on there so important...
#2. Even if he is, are you going to wait around to get cheated on or dumped on?
#3. Why do you care so much more about what he is doing than you do about yourself?
#4. If you suspect that he has no respect for you... It is probably not all his fault as the #1 rule in life in dealing with people is that you TEACH them how to treat you.
My husband and I lead separate lives... He works and I take care of my kids... I do my own thing and he does his and when we do spend time together it is precious and we genuinely enjoy one another.
You really need to get off his as*s and get a life of your own... Learn it now honey. Their are two kinds of women in this world... The kind of women that men chase after and the kind of women that chase after men... It is the same as that old axiom that says. You can be a hammer or a nail. Strike or be stricken! either way it is a choice, act accordingly, do what your decision dictates and do not complain about the consequenses of what you are.
2006-10-22 08:08:32 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
u can either fight fire with fire & get addicted 2 YahooAnswers, trust me it's easy. I've been here since March & I'm still trying 2 escape.
talk 2 the dog 2, u may b pleasantly surprised, dogs don't answer back either!
Take the fuses out & hold them/dog 2 ransom 4 a few measly minutes with his lordship.
Find them fuses, take a torch & yank 'em.
He has 2 remember his real girlfriend is more important than his Virtual friends!
2006-10-22 08:01:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
You sound very unhappy. You need to talk to yourself and ask yourself, "How long am I going to continue living this way? How long am I going to make personal choices that make me unhappy?" None of this is your bf's fault. You can not make some one be who you want them to be. You can not mold a relationship to your liking. It is either mutual or it is not. Clearly from what you have stated this relationship is not satisfying for you. Your bf was not put on this earth to make you happy. To serve you, to entertain you to love you. He isn't even up to the challenge at this point. He is more than willing to take any services you are willing to give. So you must make up your own mind if you want to continue with a relationship that apparently does not fullfill your emotional needs. He clearly seems happy with what you do for him at this time and is willing to continue for the time being with your services. But ask yourself, "How long do you think he will be content before he will want to move on?" More importantly how long are you willing to give of yourself without having your emotional bank account replenished along the way? Why is it you think so little of yourself that you would stay in a relationship that offers you neglect and unhappiness? It will never be about you until you decide that it is all about you and you decide to be good to yourself. That is where it starts, you can be sure of that. People treat you the way you allow yourself to be treated.
2006-10-22 08:30:49 · answer #7 · answered by skooter 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He's taking you for granted. Tell him that you think it's time for a break. Then, stop hanging around with him for a couple of weeks. If that doesn't work, say you think the two of you should see other people. If that is cool with him, then he has probably lost interest in you. That will be your cue to move on. I know you don't want to do that, but you have to be strong. There are plenty of guys who will treat you right. You just have to look. Life is too short to be with someone who doesn't care about you.
2006-10-22 08:09:24 · answer #8 · answered by lj1 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
stop feeding him and make him do his own crap. if he wants to play the games so bad then he will learn that inorder to be able to play he must make happy the one that is supplying him with life IE food, and any thing else you do. also poisen the dog. ok dont kill the dor for get that part. if you pay the bills then just stop paying for the internat and make him pay for it. start making food he dislikes. make him realize they with out you he wilnt have time to enjoy the damn games
oy...i rember playing video games that much, cant beleve i did that...hm...not that i am on the computer any less now only differnce is that i am usualy doing college work.
2006-10-22 09:30:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are not unimportant. Unfortunately, I think a part of our human nature is that we hurt the ones closest to us. It doesn't make sense, but it happens. However, with that being said, the person that you feel you are unimportant to, he has to realize that he is hurting you and just that realization will lead to you feeling more important. But, if it just continues, you still must recognize that you are very important, and whether others want to acknowledge that or not, well, that is their problem. What matters first is that we realize we are important, and then surround ourselves with others that appreciate and value our relationships.
2006-10-22 08:00:11 · answer #10 · answered by John T 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋