Why do people bother sending late birthday presents?

Question

Almost every year most of my relatives who live about 4 states away from us send my son late birthday presents. Sometimes they arrive a few days after his birthday, sometimes a month after. I am getting sick of it and I think if you're going to send something late it's not worth sending and it's an insult to my son. I am considering calling them up and telling them not to bother this year.

Answer 1

Better late than never my godparents do that to me every year and that is the thought that goes through my head. At least they remembered and took the time. I also blame the carrier USPS or any other. Jeesh you want the kid to think these relatives dropped off the face of the earth! That would be downright mean to him. don't call them be gratuitous that it even came it shows they care.

Answer 2

I put myself in a kid's place [LOL, not too difficult] and thought, what the kid might like. I would think, Wow, a present out of nowhere, and it isn't even my birthday! Wow, It's still my birthday!
Wow, the relatives are cool! And tear off the wrapping paper, quick.
I am an adult, and my Aunt sends me a Christmas/birthday present every year, way before either event. My birthday is 13 days after Xmas. She puts them in the same mailer package, but wraps then separately, in the appropriate paper, and puts a birthday card on that present, and a Xmas package label on the other. Tacky? No way, I love it. She knows I collect Xmas ornaments, and on her way to her winter home, is a Lennox factory outlet. She buys me one every year, and sends it in plenty of time to hang it on my tree. She saves the postage on the second present, and the birthday card.
Anyway, when your 80 something, you can do what you want!
If it were me, I would accept the present, and keep my mouth closed. I do not think they mean to be insulting, and I would not take it as such. Have your son send a nice thank you card, and don't mention the lateness of the gift. We do not really know what peoples's financial or personal situations are, maybe they have to wait for a check to arrive, or wait untill a disapproving spouse is looking the other way. Think of your son, and the joy a present brings, and think what you might be teaching him, if you make that angry call to the relatives. Better to teach him to be gracious, and polite. And make a big, nice deal over the present, no matter what it is. "Look Johnny, your birthday was last month, and here is another present! Wow! Oh,you already have two of those, hey, I know, if you do not want it, see if you would like to give it to a poor kid!
And don't forget to add your thank you to Johnny's.

Answer 3

I agree that it might not entirely be their fault that the presents arrive late, since they are sending them in the mail. Sometimes mail is just late.

I think that it shows that your relatives are thinking kindly of your son. I can't imagine that your son is bitter about receiving unexpected presents, no matter the date. So it seems like probably the only person with a problem about it is you. I just don't see why they should only be allowed to express their love for him before his birthday.

I think that you can just be grateful that you have relatives who care. A lot of people don't hear from their family for years at a time. You have family members who take the time every year to send presents for your son, despite the fact that you live quite a distance away. I say keep 'em coming.

Answer 4

I'm not quite sure what the big deal is. Your relatives still gave a gift. I'm sure your son loves it. Relax, and don't look a gift horse in the mouth. People get busy, work, and have many obligations and timing a gift to arrive on the exact day is a bit much.

My best friend and I always exchange gifts late for both birthdays and Christmas. Her Christmas gift may not arrive until April, and my birthday gift usually gets there 3-5 months late. But we still appreciate them. It's gotten to be a running joke between the two of us!

Please don't sweat it. It's no big thing.

Answer 5

DOnt do that.It is not an insult. Look at the positive side. They ARE sending presents and good wishes. Not every body is systematic.They probably forgot the exact date.Or something else happened.In human relations , you should gracefully and gratefully accept love/kindness/thoughtfulness from others . Demanding such things is not a good idea.
You can say in the thank you note. Altho the gift came late , we appreciate it.

Answer 6

People send birthday presents because they have remembered fondly the person whose birthday it is. Late or not. I do hope you are developing the habit in your son of sending thank you notes after receipt of any gift--irrespective of when it arrives.

Answer 7

At least they're thinking of him. Better late than never. Give them a break, they live a long way away and they're trying as best they can. They don't owe the kid anything anyway, and they most certainly don't owe you anything. Just forget about it. Calling them and being snippy will just upset them and give the impression that you don't want them to be involved in your son's life at all.

Answer 8

It's the thought that counts..I'm surprised it bothers you so much. People get busy, life is demanding. Maybe they didn't have the money then..who knows, but at least they remember and do it then not do it at all. I don't think your son really cares, I know my child would be happy to get a present anytime!

Answer 9

Sometimes it just slips your mind. Or maybe the carrier is at fault. But better late than never. I think you're making too much of this. If you do, then your son will.

Answer 10

Be thankful that you have relatives who care! I have know one except distant relatives to fall back on who don't even know me because I was raised away from where all my relatives are from (the greater boston area). Send a thank you card back and show that you care about them to.