we have a 11 month old son should i try to object he will make more money and the benefits are better
2006-10-21 18:46:01 · 13 answers · asked by Crystal 2 in Politics & Government ➔ Military
If he wants to join, then it should ultimately be up to him. My husband is in the Marine Corps. It isn't going to be easy, but we love each other so much that we make it work. You guys can make it work too. Many other couples are in you're situation, and they can make it work. I wish you only the best of luck! Be strong and supportive for your fiance!
Take care!
2006-10-21 19:05:35 · answer #1 · answered by Katie 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Object as much as you can without distancing him from you. You need to be a solid unit and communicate as much as you can regarding this issue. The army is for soldiers who are single not married and I would have still been in had I not met the man of my dreams and got married five years ago.
I am an army wife and a veteran and have found that the only benefit from having been in the army myself and the transition to being a army wife is that i KNOW that my husband has NO control over his hours or even much to do with assignments. I would tell you to consider the different jobs within the army but there are no truly safe jobs. One would think a finance job would be safe and not be subjected to dangerous duties while deployed but my neighbor is in finance and while he was deployed he would have to drive trucks with money in it between camps and we all know that roadside bombs and snipers are the biggest threat to our soldiers "over there". Healthcare is also a consideration. Now you have a son and want to always have him taken care of, that is undebateable. However, if you are not with your spouse and are not on a military installatioin you will have to enroll in tricare-standard and have to pay for out of pocket expenses (if he gets orders to korea, you are not allowed to go and choose not to live on a military base is an example). Dental is not covered and you have to do seperate paperwork for that. Both healthcare and dental care is taken out of monthly income.
I am just really facing a difficult time right now. We were scheduled to get out of the army in may 2007 but since his unit is deploying then he has to go with them. So that is an extra 15 months (1 year tour plus 90 days after deployment, I dont know why 90 days extra). I have a three year old and even though i am a veteran myself...it is EXTREMELY difficult to deal with the army. You want to get married to a man who will be able to place family as a priority but since he is entered into a contract he will have to put the army first. It is a fact for any military service member, duty is first, family is not. I am not army wife material, but i love my husband with all my heart and will be supportive during his remaining time of course. Also, you will be doing the time too, if you can handle complete selflessness and are a strong independent young woman then you will do fine.
2006-10-21 20:03:28 · answer #2 · answered by Jessy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How long is his/her enlistment? I won't lie...it will be hard on you. Your son will never remember this part of his life, so it won't affect him. What MOS is he/she going into? How old are the two of you? If your family or in-laws are supportive, you will rely on them alot. You may also be relocating quite often, which is not fun. The money and benefits are not that great, but it will support you. It's a hard life when you have a family in the military. I'm getting out of the Army in April after 6 LONG years. I have a marriage that needs alot of work due to the military. I have also missed alot of my children's moments growing up. It's hard. Good Luck.
2006-10-21 19:05:04 · answer #3 · answered by troydhump 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Republicans will say let him do it. Democrats will say don't let him.
If he truly wants to go let him. Its always good to support your husband (that is if he supports your decisions as well) no matter what it is. Unless you truly have a problem with it. If he's doing it for the money then there will be a problem, especially what is going on right now. But if it is for something more support his decisions. But if you truly feel that you don't want him to go, then talk to him. Don't ask us, we don't know whats going on in that house.
2006-10-21 19:03:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
But are those benefits and money worth more than his life? Anyways, he could go into the Coast Guard or Navy or the reserve and still get the benefits and keep him alive.
2006-10-21 18:54:31 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
He is doing a great thing. my bf is in the military and is being deployed. but i know that he will always come back to me. and even though it may hurt to see him leave for a while, he will come back a new man that will love you more than ever. tell him i say thank you. Even though i'm canadian i still am very appreciative of the military in the states. my bf is american too.:D
2006-10-21 19:24:38 · answer #6 · answered by Starry Eyes 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
DONT LET HIM GO! Is possible money and benefits worth risking his life? No! Better to live in a cardboard box!
2006-10-21 18:54:22 · answer #7 · answered by Jacob R. 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He should not join unless you are a strong independent woman. Since you have a child together and are planning a life together, this should be a joint decision.
2006-10-21 18:55:41 · answer #8 · answered by Uncle Pennybags 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He's making a good move, just be patient and give him your support, eventually when you get married you will have great benefits.
2006-10-21 18:54:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Really a hard call, it will be way harder without him around, just make sure it is well thought out and not spontaneous
2006-10-21 18:54:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋