How do I stop beating myself up?

Question

I am always beating myself up...emotionally more than physically. How do I become a happier person?

I am overly critical of myself, and have this belief I need to be perfect all the time. I have crying fits for no reason and dread waking up every single day.

Answer 1

I recommend professional counseling in order for you to determine the reason for this. Only you can make you happy. No other person, animal or thing can do it.

I was married to a woman that constantly demanded I make her happy. Nothing I did made her happy. When I met one demand a new one would come soon after. It was a vicious circle (no end to the demands). I divorced her so someone else could try. For close to 30 yrs now, they are the two most miserable people I have ever known. I guess they are both happy being miserable.

My daughter grew to be like her mother. I finally convinced her to get help. It worked. She is happy with her life and is in college and due to graduate in 4 months.

My son realized as a child he could do nothing to make her happy and quit trying.

Please get the help you need to deal with this.

Answer 2

I'm a little bit like that too, not so much as I used to be. I know it gets frustrating, and you probably will get more of a backbone as time goes on. I think you should embrace the way you are, it's okay to be sensitive. People like you make great nurses. To stop beating yourself up, it's really just gonna take time. You just have to try not to, haha. That's all there is to it. Maybe talk to someone about it. You know, it's incredibly hard to be both genuine and sensitive to everyone at the same time. Cut yourself some slack and try to be honest instead of just nice.

Answer 3

I've learned a lot in a 12 Step program. Stick with the winners is one good tip. Also, be grateful for the little things. Accept life as it goes it's course. I'm a much happier person today, but my problems are the same as ever. it's all in how I look at things!

Answer 4

Let it all go. Tell yourself you are wonderful!! Give yourself a pep-talk and pray. My favorite bible quote when I feel myself getting down is "Do not worry about tomorrow, For I am already there." Wish I could remember which book its from.. Its a very uplifting reminder that were ever we go in life, God is with us always.

Answer 5

The first step is to trust yourself and the process.

The next step is to act in loving ways toward yourself. Talk kindly toward yourself whenever you can. If I find myself making critical comments to myself, I know it is coming from that hurt part of me. I say to that part of myself "Oh, sweetheart" (in a loving way). I find that seems to quiet that chatter.

Answer 6

You're trying to improve when you're already inherently perfect. You just cover that up with perspectives and desires.

A person with absoutely nothing may find it easier to be happy... but you must allow it.

Let go...

Answer 7

Repeat this to yourself: Everyone in the world is different. I am different from everyone else. I am never completely right or completely wrong, just like no one else is completely right or completely wrong. The best I can do is to try to be more right than wrong.

Answer 8

wear boxing gloves before u beat your self up. Its helps with the bruises.

Answer 9

our emotions are merely chemical reactions within our brain, when we rely on certain emotions we are showing addiction to certain chemicals. meditation has been shown to help with the withdrawal of these "emotional addictions"