My boyfriend and I have been together for a while and have known each other for over 9 years. He holds my hand everywhere we go, is very affectionate, has introduced me to all of his family and we hang out with his friends all the time (and he is affectionate w/me around them.) Still, he has yet to call me his girlfriend to those people even though that's what THEY call me.
I asked him about it and he got agitated and said that he's scared to since when he said it too soon in past relationships they fell apart. I want to know what his deal is. We're monogomous and he doesn't seem embarassed by me so ??? Guys (& girls) let me know what he might be thinking.
2006-10-21 17:37:42 · 13 answers · asked by aggiepud 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Ah yes, the boyfriend who refuses to acknowledge that he's your boyfriend. I've been there several times and now that I'm in a relationship with a man who had no problems saying I'm his partner...and eventually making me his wife, I've realized some things about those past relationships where men could not make a committment to a title: they just weren't that into me. :) (Sorry for the cliche'.)
Seriously, I think that there is something to be said about not having to "force" someone into saying they are committed to you. The term "boyfriend" may be irrelevant to him, but it obviously has some importance to you. Usually, when in a relationship if one party finds something very important, the other party makes an attempt to compromise. However, if this title is very important to you and a value you can't compromise....I say cut your loses. On the other hand, you may want to ask yourself why having a title is important to you. Additionally, you may want to ask the guy you're dating about the nature of your relationship.
Bottom line: if you don't feel like you can live without the title, live without the guy; but if you feel like you can't live without the guy, live without the title...at least until you feel differently.
Blessings to you either way!
Peace!
2006-10-21 17:49:55 · answer #1 · answered by Adanna 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with Adanna 100%. I am going through the same thing, and I mean that literally. It is hurting me like hell right now, but I let him go. I miss him, I think about him, and I want to call and talk to him so bad , but I am not. I had to do it because I have been hurt before, and I know this hurt will go away, but I know staying, and continuing to feel rejected in a sense will never go away as long as I am right there in it. I was not "caught up" in a title as some people like to call it. It's just that I have seen men in love who wants to shout out on the mountain top that there women is there girlfriend, and the love of their life. I have seen men that just by mentioning her name makes his whole face light up in only a way that love can, and you mean to tell me I have to threaten to break up with him or ask him over and over what are we just to get him to acknowledge me as his girlfriend. Think about the most in love couple you have ever known, and ask yourself did he or she have to ask what are they to each other.
I sometimes hope he will come back, but I know a lot of that is the pain talking. I often hope he will come back and tell me everything I want to hear, what went wrong, and I want him to mean every word of it, but I am not going to settle for him if he does not, and I am definitely not going to do anything at my expense because I deserve better. You don't want to find out tomorrow that he is cheating on you and then when you confront him he says how did I cheat on you, you are not my girlfriend. Sure you guys have been together for a long time, but you can't cheat on someone who is not your girlfriend.
Think about that.
2006-10-21 18:10:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
shop it shifting. Your too previous and why must you be in a dating together with her and consistent with threat pass each and each of how and supply your organic present to her and he or she doesnt have a organic present to giive returned to you. it incredibly is in simple terms theft. possibly destiny will convey you to returned mutually till then Dont confer together with her. you choose peace and somebody who loves you for you and could be truthful and could no longer harm you. She needless to say cant do any of that . tell that woman its over dont call me You blew it i'm bored stiff in you and your drama. You cant turn a revolving door right into a house spouse.
2016-10-15 07:09:57 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My boyfriend of 2 yrs. did call me his girlfriend but didn't treat me like one. I started wondering why? He would never give me full, true honest answer. We have to follow our gut instincts..something's wrong, not good. They are emotionally detached men and they are ones to stay away from. Find someone who's truly "into you".
2006-10-21 17:46:16 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Believe him. Just tell him that the relationship doesn't end depending on what you call each other. Tell him that you want to be called his girlfriend.
2006-10-21 17:43:02 · answer #5 · answered by craz34jason 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems that he means what he says. To break it down for you, he doesn't want to have sex, he merely wants to be a good friend of yours. He probably has a lot of other female friends, right? Well, there you go.
2006-10-21 17:41:11 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It looks like he's scared to make a commitment.
2006-10-21 17:50:14 · answer #7 · answered by Kendra 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, by what you're saying, maybe he's shy to admit it in front of the family.
2006-10-21 17:41:11 · answer #8 · answered by Coche 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if he isnt there is a reason find out what that is n maybe get rid of him
2006-10-21 17:39:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
IT SOUND LIKE HE SEE YOU AS EVERYTHING ELSE BUT
THE GIRLFRIEND. AND THAT SOMETHING THAT YOU
NEED TO TALK TO HIM ABOUT, BECAUSE IF HE NOT
'ASHAMED THAT YOU HIS GIRL, THEN WHAT THE DEAL
IN TELLING THE WHOLE WOLD THIS IS MINE.
2006-10-21 17:41:19 · answer #10 · answered by luckystar 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋