Well I was dating this guy...I think we're done now. He told me that he doesn't love himself and is always miserable that he needs to be more serious about AA (mainly by surrounding himself w/their members) and can't date until he feels he's loves himself. He feels like i'm "too good for him". I really care about him and feels he cares about me too...I have never dealt w/alcoholism or depression...so could you help me understand what's going on or is this guy "just not that into me". I just feel that no matter what you're going through in your life, if you are "in to" a person, you'll stop at nothing to be with them.
2006-10-21 16:37:26 · 8 answers · asked by Kyppa 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
ya be patient and understandin but set some limits on what u will n wont put up with ..
2006-10-21 16:39:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing you can do is find an Alanon meeting, it is for freiends and family of people with addictions. If you don't like the meetings, get the books. They saved my life in concerns with associations with an alcoholic in my life.
Love doesn't slove all things like we tend to believe. And love doens't mean two people need to be together. This is something you will learn eventually in life. We all have someone or more that we can't be with but will always love.
You will realize you didn't cause this man's issues, you can't control them and you c an't cure it.
It will be up to him to get himself in to a healthier place mentally and emotionally. If you try to help him you are being co-dependent.
.
It isn't about him "not being that in to you" it is about his fight with addiction and the depression that lingers around him. He has the possibality to pull out of it and that is what recovery is all about.
Remember Alanon
2006-10-21 16:50:54 · answer #2 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Over the last five years I had begun to have increasingly withdraw into a downward spiral of depression..
But now with the method I can fully focus my energy and thoughts into a decisive line on how to make my life better constantly. And it works like magic! I'm beginning to attract people to me once again and things have just been looking up since then.
Helping you eliminate depression?
2016-05-16 00:17:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the best thing you can do for this person is to introduce him to a good bible teaching/preaching/believing church. This will be one that understands that sin catches us all at different times and that none of us are without sin. Your person should learn that God LOVES HIM! That the bible tells us that He knows us in the womb and that each of us are special to Him. Jesus died upon the cross just for your Friend and defeated death.
Just because your friend sounds like a nice guy doesnt mean that you need to get involved with him. He appears to have severa strong issues and is not sure how to address and solve them. I wish you well and will pray for both of you. See, I need not know your names, because God does and He will know who I lift up.
2006-10-21 16:44:34 · answer #4 · answered by texandfw 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You never stated how long he's been sober. does not sound long for many that have been around application of AA exchange into particularly happy. somebody in AA may well be maximum appropriate him interior the path of no relationships till he has discovered extra approximately loving himself. additionally very much of convalescing human beings locate "exterior" help additionally effectual.
2016-10-15 07:05:49 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's pretty standard for people new to AA are told not to date until they are strong within themselves. It's not a law, but he still has a lot of healing to do before he can share his life with someone else.
2006-10-21 16:41:04 · answer #6 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first he shouldnt be dating until hes been sober for a year.You shouldnt date men with problems like that,there is a big chance he can relapse and break your heart.You need to pray for him and definately be there for him but dont get romantically involved until he gets his life in order.Good luck to you.
2006-10-21 16:43:13 · answer #7 · answered by Erica B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is the advice A.A. and its sponsor gives to a person who is working on sobriety. A.A. works for some people, not for everyone.
I think it is time to move on. Best wishes.
2006-10-21 16:43:05 · answer #8 · answered by Rhonda 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋