The only person I feel comfortable being around is my boyfriend. I feel anxious alot. I don't know what to do. My boyfriend wanted to have friends over tonight. And I didn't want to (we pretty much live together so the decision is the both of ours). And its fine that he did. But he didn't take what I wanted into consideration. It was like he already made up his mind that they were going to come over, and and didn't care how I felt. I don't like being around people, ever, ever, ever. Unless it is my boyfriend. I hate it when I walk to class (on college campus), or go to the cafeteria, parties, walmart, anything. Anybody else feel this way?? Like they just can't relax, ever?? And they need time to do it, on the weekend, without people there...because they can't relax with the people there. But he wants them, there, so I feel like I never got that recuperation relaxation time I need to face the next stressfull week of school, or being around people again.
2006-10-21 16:33:02 · 16 answers · asked by Green Tea Happy 3 in Health ➔ Mental Health
I have never felt this comfortable around anyone (my boyfreind), in my whole life. I feel as comfortable around him, as I do all by myself in a room, probably more comfortable actually. I can be the exact person that I am, when I am all alone infront of him, and I love that.
I never used to feel this anxious around other people before. I have always felt it to some degree, but never like this.
2006-10-21 16:34:14 · update #1
Do you just hear alot of noise in your head when you are around people? When you go into large stores and its crowded? Are you overwhelmed?
Maybe you are an Empath and you are obsorbing all the negative energy.
I do the same. I never understood it until I read up on Empaths.
2006-10-21 16:36:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 5⤋
Don't feel bad about how you feel. I've felt like that before. Never wanted to meet new people or risk having a stranger even notice my exsistance. I decided to take a risk and begin to trust the world around me. The only way to get past it is to take a chance and talk to the people around you. The next time you go to Wal-mart start a conversation w/ the cashier. At school be the first one to answer a question. You can't always expect that same comfort level with other people that you have with your boyfriend. It took time for you to get there. Experience different types of comfort with different types of people.
Hope this helps....
2006-10-21 16:48:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you have anxiety attacks or a social panic disorder maybe. I mean we all feel that at times. I know sometimes when I go out I feel like there's a million eyes burning lasers in my back, but sometimes it gets to me but most of the time it goes away. But how come you don't have any friends that you can invite over? Because what is going to happen if you guys happen to break up, then what? Say if you catch him cheating, then are you still going to be comfortable or will you be in an awkward state? But you need to tell him that it is bothering you, and probably pick a time when you are not home to have friends around so you won't be so uncomfortable. I don't know if you're insecure or if you want his full undivided attention because he has friends over, but I think it might be beyond isolation from people, it maybe your relationship and school can take away from it all. Do something that you can have some productivity and positivity, ANd relax, make some friends or let someone make you their friend and invite them over, so you won't be left out.
2006-10-21 16:51:29 · answer #3 · answered by Dr. PHILlis (in training) 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
I don't really feel comfortable around people either, unless it is someone that I love. I would rather be alone most of the time than around others. It just seems like too much time and energy to keep up the small talk. I do have to say though that I do not feel like this is necessarily a healthy attitude, and I am trying to work on it. I feel most of the time that I just simply do not relate well to most people.
2016-03-28 03:42:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would suggest since you like being alone to write down the things about people that bother you and trace your steps back to your childhood where it might have all started. You might have some repressed memories that are trying to come out. It might just be from some childhood trauma that today wouldn't seem so important. Do your own evaluation so you can really get to know yourself better. Mine were so bizarre that it seems like it was like Alice in wonderland scenario. Much I would guess was from illnesses and sleep deprivation. I had lived with asthma most of my life but wasn't accurately diagnosed until a couple of years ago. You might be having asthma attacks from the perfumes and colognes other people are wearing.
2006-10-21 18:11:46 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't believe you puposely do it because I know exactly what you mean and understand completely. I call it "zoning out." Do you get real weepy when you feel this way? I don't consider it anti-social behavior as I have suffered from clinical depression for over 15 years and my advice to you is get a TSH test for your thyroid. The only person I'm comfy with is my mom because she's the only one who looks out for me. " Trying to relax " isn't easy- what you described is borderline anxiety attacks; you just want to be left alone, not go anywhere and when you do, you actually get sick and wind up with your head in your hands in the bathroom trying to cool off because the adrenalin is too fast. It's hard, it really is. I use essential oils alot and they help. Lavender is great for calming me down as well as chamomile. If you feel like talking to someone, feel free to email me at meadowbloom@gmail.com
2006-10-21 16:48:41 · answer #6 · answered by ? 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes I totally understand where your comming from. i dont go anywhere or do anything or see anybody. i often call myself a Hermit Crab. Always hiding in my shell. We are just very Solitary People. Now im great one on one with somebody but, Put me with 2 or more and i clam up close up shut up. I am perfectly content being all alone doing nothing going nowhere seeing nobody. If you add Depression to this, OMG!! It makes the solitary personality 10 times worse.
2006-10-21 16:40:21 · answer #7 · answered by Crissy 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You sound like my brother. He even works a night shift just so he doesn't have to deal with anyone. I don't know why, but I think he needs to talk to someone about this, as do you. I mean a doctor. Feeling comfortable by yourself is one thing, but when you start arranging your life so that you can be alone, it's invasive. Your boyfriend is probably comfortable with your feelings most of the time. But you have to realize that most people have the desire to socialize, and sometimes you need to compromise your own feelings for his sake.
Talk to a counsellor, a psychiatrist, a doctor. It's best for you and your future.
2006-10-21 16:45:57 · answer #8 · answered by Nikki 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
It's okay to want some alone time, but it's not normal to want to be isolated from the world all the time. Maybe you have an anxiety disorder. You should see a professional.
2006-10-21 16:41:42 · answer #9 · answered by call_me_t 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have social anxiety disorder. You can go to the doctor to find out for sure. What your going threw is very unhealthy, common, but still its unhealthy.
You can change on your own, without help, but its very very difficult and can take years. Your best bet is to go to the doctor. Get support from your boyfriend.
2006-10-21 17:10:30 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You need to get some confidence and some self-respect. Get your boyfriend to introduce you to his friends and have a chat with them, I'm very shy but I force myself to step out of my comfort zone, this helps me.
2006-10-21 16:43:57 · answer #11 · answered by blclionel 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋