i want all the furniture and sh1t out of our house is that selfihs or wrong?
2006-10-21 12:54:09 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
is not the same house
2006-10-21 12:57:56 · update #1
theres also stuff that his mom and dad got for both of them like a scrap book of him for when they got married just pictures of him but i think it was for her
2006-10-21 13:00:02 · update #2
I think it's normal to feel that way. It can make you feel insecure if he insists on keeping this stuff. I'll tell you, my husband and I separated for some time awhile back, and during that time we each got somewhat involved with someone else. When we got back together, it was a prerequesite to get rid of all the other stuff. From clocks, to cookware, etc. Anything that was purchased, given, or left by the other's, during our separation was destroyed. Even the silverware he bought to replace the set I took was thrown out. We actually turned it into a cleansing ritual. We built a huge pit in the back yard, and everything that represented the time of our separation, we burned. What wouldn't burn, we took to the dump. :-) I HIGHLY recommend it.
2006-10-21 14:27:41 · answer #1 · answered by kari w 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe having reminders of her in the house will remind him of how lucky he is to have you instead. The glass can be half full in this case. He will see these items, and remember why he and her are divorced. I would, however, change the bed, bedding, etc. for sure. There shouldn't be pictures of her in that house either. Just bring things in that are YOUR style, and work with what you have. What if he asked you to get rid of all YOUR furniture just because it was your ex's? Things are just things. If you still can't get over it, ask him if you can have a garage sale so you can at least make some kind of profit from it all. Good luck!
2006-10-21 13:12:30 · answer #2 · answered by Caelan's mom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not? Why does it bother you? It's just furniture and stuff, it's not his ex, and he's with you now, presumably of his own free will - you didn't subject him to a shotgun wedding, did you? *winks* All kidding aside, I don't think you can say that it's selfish or wrong - those things don't really apply, Does it make a lot of sense, though? No, not really.
I'd just say that you probably need to work on your self-esteem a bit if you feel threatened or bothered by mere inanimate objects just because they were once owned by your husband and his ex. Sweetie, you're wonderful and loved, otherwise he wouldn't have married you, and his ex is just that - his ex. We all have them. And things are just things, that's all. Take a deep breath and trust in your husband's love for you - you're the one he's chosen to be married to now.
2006-10-21 13:05:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anna S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it is necessarily selfish or wrong, but why are you so insecure about furniture? If the furniture is nice, keep it and quit acting so immature. If you keep on with this type of attitude, you will end up being his next ex-wife. His past is his past and leave it there. He chose you and quit nit picking at the least little thing. Grow up!!!!
2006-10-21 13:21:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no. ppl tend to keep things that we're given because of the memories, and now that he's with you, you don't want to have to be reminded of his ex. I would get kinda weird if I had someone who held on to things, like rings or live notes, from a past relationship, but i really wouldn't mind furniture...except the bed.
2006-10-21 12:58:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to realize that since your husband was the head of the house he owned everything. Kind of like property gets passed down to males. This way when a woman gets married she will have a man to provide for her and she won't need to have anything herself. You aren't being selfish, you just aren't seeing things clearly. Realize these things don't belong to her, they belong to her husband which is your husband now.
2006-10-23 10:14:21 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Things his parents gave him you should never touch.
What your feeling is insecurity. I would have a new bed and not worry about anything else. Unless he connects with the furniture emotionally regarding his ex.
2006-10-21 13:09:19 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't blame you, why would you want something that your husband and his ex had. It's their memories not yours, So go ahead get new things, make your own new memories together, but make sure this isn't gonna damage your relationship with your husband, it's almost like choosing your battles. Good luck.
2006-10-21 13:03:09 · answer #8 · answered by Windy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes a little selfish. bur it depends on why you want to get rid of it. is it because he still has sentimental feeling for the furniture. or is it you that carry the feelings about the furniture?
2006-10-21 13:42:31 · answer #9 · answered by IRNECKED4U 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have every right to feel that way. Why would you want stuff in your house that might remind him of her or you thinking of them together on the couch and stuff. Get rid of it.
2006-10-21 12:56:32 · answer #10 · answered by Sexy-n-Hot 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋