I only saw him a few times before he went to jail.He has already writen to me a few times. He doesnt mention he wants me to wait for him, but im scared that he will. I wouldnt know what to answer
2006-10-21 08:57:47 · 18 answers · asked by .^_^. 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
OOOOOOO girl that is a hard one...what is he in jail for??? Well any reason really is bad...hmmm....you only met him a few times so you don't love him yet....GET RID OF HIM **N O W** before it is too late......
2006-10-21 09:00:29 · answer #1 · answered by })i({ J and D's Momma })i({ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well it kinda depends on how long he is going to be in jail, if its only a couple weeks then give the relationship a chance but if its a couple years you have to have a life. I would write him and keep in touch as friends no matter what. I know alot of people who have recently been arrested and I can tell you that it really helps them to know that there are people out here who care about them. The letters you write mean alot to them. I really think he would be okay with you seeing other people as long as you were still a friend to him. I guess it would also kinda depend on what he was in jail for. For instence if he were there for child molestation or rape I'd cut him off completely but drugs or shoplifting I'd have to be there for him. As a friend of course.
Also remember we make mistakes so we may learn. It isn't true that once an offender always an offender. I was arrested a while back and have completely turned my life around yet there are career criminals out there. Thats why it is important to show first time offenders that there are people in the world that care and hurt when they are in there.
2006-10-21 16:12:12 · answer #2 · answered by lil sis 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is a lot laying on this question. You didn't give any details to help out with the answer. What did he do to go to jail, how long he will be in jail for, is he worth waiting on, do YOU want to wait on him, did he say he wanted something serious before he went to jail or after he went to jail? You have a lot to have to consider here as to whether or not you should wait on him.
I my self have waited on someone that went to jail, but that was me, and I also knew that person long before they went to jail.
Some people do make mistakes and have to pay the price by either going to jail or prison. But that does not make them a bad person, it just says they made a mistake. If they learned their lesson while locked up and don't break the law again, that is a good thing, it's the ones that don't learn their lesson that I look down on.
As a finial note: It does not hurt to keep in touch with a prisoner. They need pen-pals as well. If you don't want to have anything serious with him, let him know and that you just want to be friends and nothing more. Just be honest with him on how you feel.Good luck with what ever you decide on doing.
2006-10-21 16:20:35 · answer #3 · answered by SapphireB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To be honest, it really all depends on what he did and whether it's career-ending or completely life-wreckable…
The fact he's still in jail does not bode well… One, he could have committed a violent offense which would preclude his chances for a happy outcome; but i'm more worried about Reason No. 2…
… he has no money to pay his bail, no support from anyone else (probably due to his using up all available support), or is just a plain loser.
I would be more worried about his inability to pay what could be a minor bail; if he can't dig himself out of this jam, he won't be able to take you out, buy you gifts from time to time, endulge your fantasies on occasion, and will generally be relying on you for all support.
If you like losers, take this project on; but if you are looking for something better out of life… find a nice guy that will do all the right things… like obeying the law.
Wish you luck!
2006-10-21 16:03:51 · answer #4 · answered by diagofaldi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Follow your gut instincts. What is he in jail for?Make sure you let him know that you are not going to have an exclusive relationship, but will remain friends and be supportive.I had a guy I was dating who went to prison and we didn't stay in touch, but when he got out he was a very productive member of the community, held a very good job and was a good father. He and I have ramained friends for about 30 years. Everybody makes mistakes and we shouldn't be judged for one. If we continue to make the same bad decisions, then there is a problem.
2006-10-21 16:03:52 · answer #5 · answered by oldhippygrandma 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I thin k you have to be te one to answer this one.. Ask yourself these questions.. Is he in jail for something he did that could effect you later? Do you really want a life with someone whom you do not know if he may or may not be there when you need him the most? What will you do if you have his child and he is in jail most of the time? do you reall want your child growing up like that? Ask yourself those question and if you have to think about the answer then NO he is not worth waiting for.
2006-10-21 16:01:48 · answer #6 · answered by Gail C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd move on if I were you. A good friend of mine went through something similar recently. The only difference is that now the guy is out and trying to hunt her down. He went to jail for rape!! She's now had to move out of town to avoid him!!
2006-10-21 16:13:08 · answer #7 · answered by frenchsailor33 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Face the fact that you cannot change him or rescue him from himself. Politely tell him that you need to move on and let him go.
2006-10-21 16:00:51 · answer #8 · answered by madman 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He would probably appreciate you keeping in touch with him! Don't worry about your answer until he asks the question.
2006-10-21 16:01:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Always remember a gf/bf problems become your problems. You have to decide is it more than you're willing to take.
2006-10-21 16:03:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋