I clean and clean for nothing! It just gets right back messy at the end of the night. You can't even tell that I cleaned at all. Also I hate putting away my laundry. I wash it, put it in a basket and leave it there. Then it gets scattered all over the floor. I need help. I don't want to live in a dirty home. I also could use some advice on how to get motivated to clean and not be so tired all of the time. Joni
2006-10-21 02:50:31 · 21 answers · asked by jjkk 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Joni you honestly shouldn't be doing it all alone! If you have school age children make them help. I set everyones 's laundry on there bed and they are responsible for folding and putting it away. If they don't and it gets wrinkled- oh well. They are the ones that wear it. They will learn really quick to fold and put away as they want to look nice. Have a different colored basket for each person and any of there clutter laying around gets dumped into the basket and set in there room- Same with your husband- he has to take responsibility also. You all live in the home, eat there, etc... make them take responsibility! If they don't want to help with dishes and clean up duties they don't get to eat. It sounds tough but it realy isn't. Good luck ~
2006-10-21 02:58:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to have a Family meeting about this and let them know that things are going to change.
Realistically, your going to have a dirty house at some point in time, but its not healty for you to take on this huge task alone....being that your the only one caring about this.
I feel the stress in your words, and I'm hoping you get this worked out.
All of this can damage your self esteem and cause you physical harm by thinking about the situation....so this is serious.
Seek help within the house. If that doesnt help matters, my suggestion is to find a way to decrease the bills (Cutting off the cable, or internet, or taking away privelages) and put that money towards a maid. That just a suggestion.
Dont let this mentally harm you. The answer is right in front of you, you just have to redefine your search.
gudluk, and best wishes
2006-10-21 02:58:43 · answer #2 · answered by diaz276 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the other two women who said to stop cleaning and let them see how they like it. I have 5 children between me and my fiancee, a friend who is 20 and her 1 year old living with us, etc....once...I got so aggravated at running around like a chicken with my head cut off that I flipped out! I started throwing PAPER trash (nothing messy, mind you) on the floor NEXT TO THE TRASH can, only washed MY clothes and let everyone else wake up to trying to find their clothes and dealing with the fact that they were not clean and not having time to wash it...I left things all around the house, generally did what they did to me...surprisingly, these nasty dirty people didn't like that and really got the hint lol! I hated to do it..I can't stand a dirty house, but it was worth it. Also, with the kids...give them privileges just to take them away when they don't help out. Small hint though, my children/step children range from 3-10 years old...they have been cleaning up after themselves and pitching in with chores since they were old enough to pick up a toy and luckily for me, I don't have that much trouble with them not helping. Make chore lists...after school (I assume they are school-aged?) Give them 30 min of un-limited FREE time...TIME THEM ON A TIMER...when the alarm is up...make it chore time. Most important, be consistent with whatever it is that you decide to do...you don't have to keep with it forever, try different things....but be consistent with what you tell them..Good luck!
2006-10-21 04:15:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will be surprised how many people have the same problem.
I had the same problem with clothes, what i do now as soon as I empty my dryer I fold the clothes, then put it away, one load at the time. If you wait until you washed and dried two or more loads it is overwhelming, one load at the time really works. Try it.
Do you watch Soaps? During every commercial break I dust. Each day write a chore on your calender, just one and do it, you feel so much better and in time you will have a nice clean house.
2006-10-21 03:08:48 · answer #4 · answered by mimi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Both my boys are in school. My children have a chore board. They know what their chores are for the day. They know that when they come home from school homework is first and then chores. If they are not done they are not allowed to play video games and my boys love video games. It's not going to happen overnight, but be firm with the punishment and be consistent. As for your husband, try talking to him. Laundry is another story, I can not stand putting my laundry away. But to keep from getting backed up on laundry I make sure I put it away as soon as I am done folding them. If I don't they will sit in the basket for weeks. Bringing the laundry down to the laundry room is one of my children's chores.
2006-10-21 04:36:49 · answer #5 · answered by frosty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should consider joining Flylady's Yahoo! mailing group. Here is a link for it. Remember, baby steps, 15 minutes at a time, and it won't happen overnight, but it's definitely possible to get things under control. Good luck!
The mailing list will send you reminders and tips throughout the day. It is really helpful when you need some guidance/motivation! Good luck :)
2006-10-21 03:07:24 · answer #6 · answered by Jemmie Vee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know I have a teenager & 7 year old. I keep myself sane by keeping "my space" clean. If they leave something laying around, I (literally) throw it in their rooms & shut the door. I do my basic cleaning 1 day a week. I do a load of laundry every morning before work. Try giving rewards for everything they do to help you. Good Luck!
2006-10-21 02:57:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound like me...you poor thing! Your family is going to have to do their part. your stuck and are feeling helpless, i know. Have a family meeting, sit down and give each of the kids chores, mostly to clean up their own messes. Have a heart to heart with your husband and tell him you need more help around the house. House work isn't for one person, if you work or not, everyone should pitch in. It would give you more energy to hang up your clothes and take care of your self too. Sometimes i feel so ran down from house work i rarely have time for myself! Set down the rules mama!!
2006-10-21 02:58:26 · answer #8 · answered by Curious J. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to tell your husband and girl's what you have written down here. Your girls are old enough to help you out. Give each one of them a job to do, even if you have to post in on the refrigerator or something. The first thing they should do is make their beds in the morning. They need to fold and put away their own clothes too. This is your fault for always doing everything for them, just like most of us mom's do. Tell them that you are going on strike, that you are not going to cook or do anything around the house for any one but you, so that they need to learn how to take care of themselves. Tell hubby that he needs to enforce it and that he needs to check after himself to make a good example of himself and to get on them about helping you around the house. Make one day of the week a day that you all do something together, like doing the wash together and folding it and putting it away, that would also be a good time to for girl talk, make fun out of it, then take them to a fast food place and have some lunch together, but don't give in your doomed. Let them decide what's for dinner and then let them help cook it.
2006-10-21 03:05:34 · answer #9 · answered by lisa b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1) Your husband should know better; shame on him.
2) School age girls over the age of 7 should have some sort of chores, have they ever heard of privilege's being taken away (ex: cell phone's & their friends).
I understand your frustrations, it sounds like they are taking advantage of you & the situation. Can you try role reversal or would that drive you crazy?
Try going "on-strike", what have you got to lose.
Cook dinner for YOU; clean YOUR clothes, do things for YOURSELF and forget them. When they ask why you're not doing things for them you can tell them you've had it and things have to change.
Good luck! :)
2006-10-21 02:59:58 · answer #10 · answered by ltsnthf 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋