My son always whines when he does not get his way. When he's good I surprise him with something small and let him know how good he is. For the most part he never gives me the chance to do that. I tell him we are going to the grocery store he falls to the ground and whines. That's with anything. He always says he never gets anything when he does. I put him on a schedule, but I don't know if it does any good. Then, when I just snap and get mad for the continuous behvior, he tries to manipulate and get you to feel sorry for him saing things like "I'm just a dumb freak". I don't know what to do. He's a really smart kid and very fun to be around when he's happy. I just don't know how to keep it that way and feel like im doing the right thing by him.
2006-10-21 01:54:11 · 10 answers · asked by squirrelee09 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
He's doing it because it works, at least some of the time. You've got your work cut out for you because he's been getting away with it for so long, but it's not hopeless. When he starts the tantrum, send him to his room. I did this with my own kids, I just started earlier. I'd tell them to stay there until they were ready to be around people. So they would stand in the doorway and scream and I'd tell them to close the door because I could still hear them. They'd usually slam it shut, but I would ignore that. Well, they would only be in there for maybe 5 minutes when the screaming would stop and they'd be asking to come out. I've done the same thing with my friends older kids and my stepdaughter. So far it's worked on them all.
He's throwing the tantrums to get attention and make you give in. If you don't stick to your guns every time, without exception, he'll never stop. My husband's kids are now 9 and 13 and when he's around, they're total brats because they know he'll put up with it. When he's whining, tell him if he insists on acting like a baby you'll put a diaper and a bib on him, but either way your going to the store and he'scoming with you. (Incidently, the diaper goes outside his clothes!) I've never had to follow through on this, but I was prepared to. Sometimes you just have to go for shock value. Just make sure you follow through.
If he has a melt down in the store, drag him out to the car and take him home. Then he can spend the rest of the day in his room with no TV, video games, or anything else that means anything to him. Sounds harsh, but drastic times and all...I've only had to abandon the shopping cart once for each of my kids. Just once. It was early in the day and that means they were banished (except for meals and bathroom) for a long time. But they take me seriously when I say they'll spend the rest of the day in their room if they don't behave!
My daughter always pulled the bid for sympathy act too. She's 12 now and still gives it a try now and then. When she was younger I would just say, "no you're not, you're just acting like (a dumb freak or whatever the slur) to get attention, which is just annoying. When you're yourself, your a lot of fun to be around." I've even explained to my kids that while I'll always love them more than anything, and no matter what, when they act like that it's very hard to like them. Once they understood the difference I could just tell them when they were making it difficult for me to like them. Well, this all worked for me. Hang tough and good luck!
2006-10-21 03:48:10 · answer #1 · answered by Chocoholic 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is playing you and you are giving in. Raising a human being is not about them being happy everyday. I wish it were. You are not doing him any favor by catering to his every whim. You must put your foot down and be tough. In the long run he will be happier with rules and discipline. You have to be consistant and you will start seeing results. Don't do things out of anger cause then he will know he won for sure. Take care of the situation before it gets to that point. Put restritions on him. You don't reward children just for acting like they are supposed to. I mean a surprise reward occasionally is fine but reward for the sack of reward is a bad idea. He needs to earn what he already has.
2006-10-21 02:09:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My 2 youngest toddlers are 14 months aside in age. they're now 3 and four years outdated. Any time that they have got ever tried hitting, we might examine out them with an exceptionally severe, stern expression and say "we don't hit". Repeat as many situations as necessary. holiday does artwork, it in simple terms takes the persistence of job. you in simple terms could desire to be good. as quickly as he realizes which you're in fee, he will tire of being decrease back to the holiday spot. this could take it sluggish, yet, this is going to artwork. If he grew to become into behaving in this way with others, i could tend to ponder whether you mandatory a professional assessment... regardless of if, that may not what you have pronounced. It sounds to me such as you want a harm, and perchance some holiday your self. Enlist as many people as are keen to perchance grant you with a harm once you're able to desire to restore. Please do no longer spank him, this won't help your subject, and ought to become a severe subject. in simple terms a concept, why no longer place the blanket the place he can attain it, and whilst he asks say" C'mon, enable's bypass get your blanket"? he's 2 you're saying nicely suited? it extremely is going to be particularly sometime beforehand this infant is self sustaining. Be calm, be, variety, instruct...
2016-12-16 11:21:42 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Smart and manipulative. A dangerous combination. You need to knock it out of him, and soon. It will not impress teachers, or classmates.
When he throws a hissy fit, no matter wher it is, walk away and ignore him. Then tell him this is what IS happening, he doesn't have a choice.
2006-10-21 02:36:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's just kids isn't it? My 17 year old stepdaughter throws tantrums exactly like my 3 year old does!
Seriously, if you are concerned take him to a paediatrican, it may be he has a problem. By no means am I an expert, but from what you have described there ares similar behaviours from children suffering from ADHD.
2006-10-21 02:03:34 · answer #5 · answered by Karen D 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you are giving in to him when he has a tantrum he will continue to have them. Ignore him and don't let him get his way.
2006-10-21 01:57:02 · answer #6 · answered by Gone fishin' 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Beat his @ss. Just beat him I bet he will get tired of spankings and change that behavior.
2006-10-22 14:14:27 · answer #7 · answered by laedeb 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has learnt that this behaviour eventually gets him what he wants
2006-10-21 03:23:56 · answer #8 · answered by chelles_insanity 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why? Because it's working for him!!!
2006-10-21 02:02:47 · answer #9 · answered by missingora 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
do not give in.win nicely
2006-10-21 02:00:10 · answer #10 · answered by stefan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋