we have dis relation for 4 yrs.so sometimes i feel he is bored.i know he loves me but i am afraid that he may stray.he has left me a couple of times but he has returned after a few months.this hurts a lot.once he left me and proposed another girl.but when she refused he came back to me.how can keep him forever?
2006-10-20 20:50:31 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
see u cant keep him tied to you. u cant trust him
2006-10-20 20:54:07 · answer #1 · answered by rajan naidu 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ouch, you gotta get over this guy. Threatening to leave all the time is a manipulation, ...the oldest trick in the book really (slightly older then creating a common enemy). I'm guessing that you are seeing something that isn't really there. In other words, he's not that great. Before you start feeling defensive of him, hear me out. You've gone down a dead end!!! Being with him makes you kind-of happy, but you want more but despite what you may be thinking, YOU ARE NOT GOING TO BE ABLE TO CHANGE HIM. So you are going to are to find a way to tolerate being alone for a while. Because, I suspect, it is your fear of being alone that is keeping you with him.
Just my 2¢,
Good Luck
2006-10-20 21:02:42 · answer #2 · answered by Al 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We have a purpose in every one's life. Your boyfriend's purpose in your life had been accomplished. Your time spent to him, your love and everything.
For me the best thing to do is to "pray" a lil bit corny but it can help you. Ask for HIS guidance. Do you believe in "destiny"? I think if God will allow you to be with your boyfriend whatever/wherever it takes you you will still be forever, but if God wont allow i dont think it will work.
Four Years is too long, i guess both of you are too familiar with each other. Girl, why not try hanging out with your friends, sometimes you need to give space. If you see each other wednesday why not say NO on thursday. Yeah u know what I mean? He might realize your worth by doing that.
Bottom line, be yourself, don't extend too much effort thinking what would make him happy, instead, what would you do to make your life happy, your boyfriend must also extend some effort on what would make you happy. Life is short sistah, you dont know what will happen to you and to your boyfriend.
Years is not the measurement if you will be with each other forever it is in the quality of having that relationship.
Enjoy your life ok? there's a lot more in store for you.
"Mind over matter"
2006-10-20 21:28:50 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl it seem like he is just there b/c you will have him. you need to sit down and ask yourself if this is really what you want. if you have to ask how to keep him happy then you dont need him. and if he keeps leaving you, the just let him go. it is not worth all the pain i have been right were you are at. 3 yrs on an off with a guy. the last time we were together it was for 45min. and that was several years ago. now I am happily married and have been for 2 years. sometimes you just have to let go and move on there is always something better out there. dont beat yourself to death trying to make some one happy who dosent even want you. and that is what it sounds like. sorry but u need to hear the truth. I am sure you can find some one to make YOU happy. STOP thinking about him and start thinking about YOU.
2006-10-20 20:58:16 · answer #4 · answered by Nikki 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no guarantee that a guy will never breakup with you just like you cant say the same for yourself. The person could be everything you want but maybe one day what you want is something different and what then? Don't waste your time by trying to be the perfect girlfriend for him and just be yourself. If he is not satisfied with who you are then find yourself someone who will appreciate the real you.
2016-03-18 22:23:30 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to let it go and stay let it go. you can't make him stay forever. as most people will tell you on here. but sounds like you have some self esteem issues you need to work on. taking someone back all the time no matter what sounds like desparation. you need to break it off and go into counselling. serious.......you are much better person then that to just be accepting such behavior. being his old reliable. you showed him he can treat you anyway he wants to cause you always take him back. i know it will be hard.........but break it off or if he leaves don't let him back. look up counselling centres in your area and see someone to help you understand why you let this behavior continue, what turn of events in your life took place that you kept such a low self esteem. someone who valued themselves to the highest and had self love 100% would not let someone treat them like this. look inside and grow from there. dont' you want to be happy and content inside on who you are and to what you see when you look in the mirror. and not just whats there physically...but emotionally, mentally, and spiritually
2006-10-20 20:59:41 · answer #6 · answered by Jody SweetG 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You guys sound young...if he's 25 or younger, you may have to let him go a couple more times before he knows what he wants...if you love something let it go.... and loosen up the reigns...give him some space...w/o 20 questions, and practice loving him "just because" --if you smother, he'll blaze.
2006-10-20 20:56:42 · answer #7 · answered by jakkibluu 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do you want to "keep" him? When he is treating you like a doormat! Dump him and move on with your life. Your just a sure thing when he can't get anything else. You are the one that taught him how to treat you.
2006-10-20 20:54:56 · answer #8 · answered by ncamedtech 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you have TRY to keep him and he keeps leaving, he obviously thinks of you as a safe bet, he has you around his finger. the healthy thing to do would be leave him(it would hurt, but its what i semotionaly, and mentaly healthy) if he proposed to another girl, that should say it all right there, he DOSNT LOVE YOU. leave him, and look for a better person to spend your time with.
2006-10-20 20:54:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah what he said, i know you love him, but i actually think you should break up w him.
It hurts i know.
but there is someone just like him but million times better.
hes trying to move on, proposed?
no, dont think so.
i had a girlfriend the same things kinda happened.
i didnt propose, but i left her, and dated my friends, alot of them. we broke up like 5 times. till she found someone.
now im moved on 2 months later. said goodbye and treat my friends like im going out w them.
i have 2 boyfriends and 4 girlfriends.
my wind man, and my peeps.
they should come first.
they can actually supplement that loss.
ask them to have a good time.
i wonder what they'd say
2006-10-20 20:58:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Poor angel, I guess you really love this guy to put up with his crap. I would have left this guy long ago if I were you. Anyway, do you know the girl with whom he proposed to? Maybe you could observe her personality trends and stuff, maybe you could learn from you and see what it is that she's got that attract your bf.
2006-10-20 20:57:26 · answer #11 · answered by sexy_cat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋