My fiance is Muslim and I am not, we are going to get married, and he says that he will need to pay me a dowry, of course I was surprised. I did know about this, but honestly didn't think he was serious, this is his first marriage and my second. He says I need to tell him an amount that he needs to give to me. I have no idea of what to say to that. Exactly what is it used for, and how much? I told him not to worry about it, but he insists on it.
2006-10-20 20:15:53 · 17 answers · asked by slwe03 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
it could be as low as 0.25 cents and as high as he can go!!
he MUST give you a dowry and you should accept it.
congrats!!!
2006-10-20 20:41:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I did not know that non muslim women get this money. It is called Mahr, a bridal gift. You can use it anyway you wish, you can request any amount...but he has to give it anytime you ask for it. My husband was not rich and I had enough of my own money so I told the Imam to decide......that man tried to put 1 million dollars on my marriage contract....I said no because it wouldnt be fair...he could never pay that to me. So I suggested 6,000$ which is fair and 10 times more than what the women in his country get but I am american so.......anyway I would say look at what you think he can afford and dont make it ridiculously small, after your wedding you can let him free of his obligation to pay if you wish. Tell him what you think is a payable amount and dont feel bad ...it is his duty as a muslim man.....................................ps this money is NOT for after a divorce or in case of seperation .. the only time you get this money after a divorce is if you had a deferred payment upon he still has to pay in full WHENEVER you ask during the marriage and you never asked during the marriage..you are to have this money anytime and he can never complain about fullfilling your rights . My husband and i went through this issue and he certainly is aware........and if your husband divorces you or seperates from you , you will get a different kind of money from him called Alimony during your IDDAH (period of waiting) and if you have kids with him he pays support for them...and if you are breast feeding a child he must pay Alimony and child support, which includes housing and clothes and food for you and the baby. MAHR money is a gift...it is not support it is yours to spend any way you want. By the way when a muslim woman works or has money she is not obligated to share it with her husband this is her right as well. Please ask your Imam at a masjid and he will state exactly the same as what i have stated....you can also find everything i have stated in then quran in plain Black and White, very clear for muslims and non muslims.......I am always amazed at the amount of fellow muslim women that dont know the full details of this.
2006-10-21 03:28:56 · answer #2 · answered by precious z 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am an American currently working in a Muslim country. Saudi Arabia, and a dowry is very common. I have several Saudi trainees that are from different regions in the country and it depends on the area they are from as to what the dowry is. Some pay as little as 26,000 to 100,000 dollars to marry. You might suggest to him that he just buy you some gold jewelry which might save quit a bit of money.
2006-10-21 03:25:55 · answer #3 · answered by j1hobbs 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i'm muslim and in islam this is comulsory on the man. he has to pay a dowry to the women when he marries her (any amount specified or objects wanted, e.g gold) and also when he divorces her he also must pay a dowry that she had specified at the beginning. do you get me? i dunno how much, but its in the thousands. like my aunt got married with $10 thousand upon marriage and $10 thousand upon divorce (if he one day decides to divorce her for some reason).
so i hope u have a good wedding. good luck.
2006-10-21 03:26:42 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
he needs to give you a dowry and you can take it from him and then return it back to him. their is a minimum amount between 100 - 200 $. But looking at his financial conditions you may ask him for a particular amount above the minimum.
2006-10-21 03:33:19 · answer #5 · answered by aa_mohammad 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be mind , If u see u need this money for u or ur family ask him for the amount u need but he able to pay it , if not ask him for Just 1 $ .
Good luck with him Muslims are very decent people like them Prophet (pbuh)
2006-10-21 03:33:17 · answer #6 · answered by roly jazz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its basically known as Meher. This amount is decided before marriage and given to the woman incase theres seperation in the future.
Islam has this custom so that after seperation, the woman has some support in the form of Meher.
2006-10-21 03:23:35 · answer #7 · answered by Huda_Alee 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
you better go and ask Shaikh.
There is a certain amount which Muslim man has to pay to his bride before marriage. I do not know what is the sum. Shaikhs in mosques definitely knows
He is insisting as it is his DUTY in Islam
2006-10-21 03:20:55 · answer #8 · answered by Suomi 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
in Islam men have to pay a dowry before marriage ,
u can use it in buying some makeup or clothes ........or anything u want
" how much " it's actually ur choice but u can ask him about the costume in his country "how much they usually pay"
2006-10-21 03:30:23 · answer #9 · answered by don'task 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
sister muslimah,
you may ask him a dowry of :
1. completely reciting Holy Qur'an once or twice or thrice a year,
2. becoming your imam/ leader in shalat/ physical prayers everyday.
and many other good commitments.
may God bless you both.
2006-10-21 03:24:13 · answer #10 · answered by harri s 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can ask him whatever you want..money, ring, earrings, house, garden..anything.
It is one of the pillars in Islamic marriage to give dowry to the bride.
2006-10-21 03:49:01 · answer #11 · answered by mido 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋