One of my best friends are always telling me these stupid jokes and I told her all of my jokes and I need some more... plz tell me some it doesn't matter what kind they are as long as they're funny!!!
Thanks!
2006-10-20 17:21:09 · 12 answers · asked by ~Manda_Panda~ 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
i wish grass were emo then it would cut itself!!
2006-10-20 17:21:58 · answer #1 · answered by Caitlyn 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Okay ...
A mother has a nosey daughter who is 10 and is always asking people questions so she decides she is going to break her of the habit. So one day on the way to drop her over at a friends the little girl asks...
"Mommy how old are you? The mother replies None of your business.
The little girl asks...
"Mommy how much do you weigh? The mother again replies none of your business.
The little girl asks....
Mommy why did you and daddy get a divorce....The mother is very upset and tells her to stop being nosey.
So the girl gets to her friends and tells her of the conversation she had with her mommy and her friend tells her to look on her mommys drivers lisence she says it tells everything about a person.
So the little girl goes home and does just that. So she goes in to her Mommy and says....
I know how old you are 45.... I know you weigh 255 lbs... and I know why you and daddy got divorced....
The mother says ok why?
The little girl says : You got an F in sex.
2006-10-21 00:27:54 · answer #2 · answered by megs 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Superman is feeling horny while flying along one day. He sees Wonder Woman lying naked in her garden, and thinks to himself... " Maybe if I use my superspeed, I can have my fun, and no-one will ever know! ". So he does just that... And, as he flies away, Wonder Woman sits up and says " what the **** was that?" and the invisible man says " I don't know, but my *** is killing me!"
2006-10-21 00:26:19 · answer #3 · answered by Dazza WWE fan 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why did the blonde change her baby's diaper once a week?
The box said "Up to 20 pounds".
2006-10-21 00:22:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
whats black and white and red all over: a nun on a meat hook
how do you kill a blonde: put a scratch n sniff on the bottom of a pool.
whats the differense between a dump truck full of bowling balls and a dump truck full of dead babies: its diffacult to unload bowling balls with a pitch fork
and
how can you tell if a blonde is having a bad day?: her tampon is behind her ear and she cant find her pencil.
2006-10-21 00:26:14 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
A business man got on an elevator. When he entered, there was a blonde
already inside who greeted him with a bright, "T-G-I-F."
He smiled at her and replied, "S-H-I-T."
She looked puzzled and repeated, "T-G-I-F," more slowly.
He again answered, "S-H-I-T."
The blonde was trying to keep it friendly, so she smiled her biggest
smile and said as sweetly as possible, "T-G-I-F."
The man smiled back at her and once again said, "S-H-I-T".
The exasperated blonde finally decided to explain. "'T-G-I-F" means
"Thank God It's Friday". Get it, duuhhh?"
The man answered, "S-H-I-T" means "Sorry, Honey, its Thursday
2006-10-21 00:23:20 · answer #6 · answered by Meggee 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
why did the blonde have square boobs?
because she forgot to take the tissues out of the box!
i love that one
2006-10-21 00:23:21 · answer #7 · answered by Leeda 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
A guy says to his friend, "I had the worst Freudian slip with his wife at dinner last night." His friend asked what he had said.
The guys says that he meant to say "Please pass me the rolls." Instead he said "You're a damn B$tch and you are ruining my life!"
2006-10-21 00:28:31 · answer #8 · answered by Angela F 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
yo hablo español me cago en ustedes
2006-10-21 00:23:17 · answer #9 · answered by esteban c 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i love yo momma jokes ;)
2006-10-21 00:22:53 · answer #10 · answered by i am the dream u r the dreamer 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋