My son has always had difficulty in social situations. He constantly feels like an outsider and he also feels bullied. He wants so badly to make friends but just seems not to have the social skills to connect with other boys his age. He crys about this and it breaks my heart.
I want so badly to help him. We've tried enrolling him in activities such as sports and scouts but that does not seem to work.
Has anybody else had this difficulty ... any assistance would be greatly appreciated.
2006-10-20 11:51:51 · 8 answers · asked by JUSTKT 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Did you ever take him to a doctor?? He might have social anxiety disorder....im asking because i have this,,and im so shy and quiet when i dont know people...and it kills me to walk into a crowded room of people i dont know...let alone talk to them. Maybe you should talk to his doctor and see what he thinks. If thats what he has and dont get help for it i would say this is how hes pretty much going to be forever....trust me im speaking from experience and im an adult.
2006-10-20 11:57:23 · answer #1 · answered by michelle 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
JUSTKT,
My oldest son was the same way at the age of 10~. We also told him that he had to be involved in at least one activity. At the age of 12 we no longer had him participate in social activities. He began corresponding with the computer (MS Messenger, Email, and Network Gaming). He eventually came out of his shell. He has a few very close friends and is still quite the introvert. However, via written communications he has learn to communicate with others and is not as hesitant as he use to be.
Does your son have a cousin or neighbor that he can start a network game or messenger with. Talk to the cousin's parent or the neighbors parent and ask them to have their son try to communicate with your son via the network. The goal is to get him started and after that just let the boy build his own skills (unless he has asked for your assistance).
There are a lot of games that are designed for networking. Go to a game store and inquire about games that can be networked and pertain to your son's age level.
Good Luck,
Bird Dog
2006-10-20 12:11:39 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was very much like him at his age. I think first off you should sit down and talk to him about how he feels and ask him how you can help. Also, his father should take him out with other male relatives so he gets a healthy understanding of male interaction. Even if he's not good at most sports, get him involved in some type of physical activity, such as bike riding, swimming or jogging.
2006-10-20 12:04:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, don't dress your kid like a nerd. If you think it looks good, cool, whatever, then the style is too old and it's really nerdy. Let him pick out stuff kids his age are into, not what you want him to be into.
Don't try to make friends for him, or be the cool mom. It really just freaks kids out - let him make his own friends and if you want to be supportive, then give him freedom.
I don't know what kind of sports you have enrolled him in, but maybe he's not a "team" sports person, and you'll have better luck (and better confidence) enrolling him in a martial art. It might be more his piece of cake. (Or maybe not, I don't know your kid)
If nothing else works, buy him a teenage mail-order bride, and he'll instantly be popular around his peers. :)
2006-10-20 12:05:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yea, I would reccomend having him checked out. People are quick to condemn parents who think their children may have disorders, but they really do exist and friends are so so important for a 10 year old.
I would ask him what he's interested in, and put him in classes or activities. Its the best way to find friends! You find kids who have the same interests, and you wil have a chance to talk to the kids' parents. Try to choose activities where the groups are small. (Put ten kids in a room and they will divide immidiatly into clicks; a group of five is more manageable and kids will be more open to relationships.)
Don't be afraid to seek proffesional help. There are people out there are are experts in relationships. A child psycologist would be a helpful perosn in this situation.
Cheers and good luck!
2006-10-20 12:04:51 · answer #5 · answered by ChaChaChingThing 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Enroll him in sports. Team sports go along way towards developing confidence in dealing with social situations. Any sport with boys his age will be good.
2006-10-20 12:26:40 · answer #6 · answered by Brandon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you have any friends that have sons around his age? Maybe you can get them to meet...
2006-10-20 11:54:29 · answer #7 · answered by ♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
show his friends your boobs! always works with me!
2006-10-20 12:05:59 · answer #8 · answered by bigclemente 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋