I am 26 and my husband is 43. I just had gastric bypass surgury 3 months ago and have lost 70 pounds already. My husband is so jellous, and insecure in our relationship. I am hardly even intrested in sex anymore, and I dont know if its because of my surgry or something else. If anyone has any advice on how I should handle this situation, please let me know. It might save my marriage.
2006-10-20 08:10:57 · 5 answers · asked by Diva Dana 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
well i can relate with the age thing. my hubby is 50, i am 30. that alone sometimes drives a wedge between us. it just takes alot of hard work. my guess is that he was already insecure about the age thing and now you have lost alot of weight and now he probably deep inside thinks you might find someone else.i know after a long talk with my hubby that that was the situation.good luck and congrats on the weight loss!
2006-10-20 08:15:59 · answer #1 · answered by supermomma 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband is 17 years older than me. I'm almost 27 and he just turned 44. We've been together for 7 years and married for five. He used to get jealous alot because of our age difference! If a man would look at me or talk to me, he'd nearly go crazy. I've never cheated on him and never will. I lost interest in sex too. Not because I wasn't physically attracted to him, but because his jealousy would make me so angry. I felt like it was an attack on my integrity and character. When the jealousy stopped, our sex life was better. You should have a frank discussion with your husband. He should be happy and supportive of your weight loss and lose the jealousy factor. Maybe then you both can enjoy your new figure in bed!
2006-10-24 11:47:08 · answer #2 · answered by msshovel79 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
CONGRATULATIONS!! I know that surgery is very difficult and good for you for doing it for yourself. 70 lbs is something to be VERY proud of so you go girl!!
When you lose sexual desire for someone, it's usually an emotional or mental issue. If he's not treating you right, ie the jealousy, it could kill the marriage.
I've always felt that dealing with someone else's insecurity problem is NOT your problem. You can assure them and cajole and be as sweet and convincing as you possibly can; if they keep it up, there's nothing you can do about it. I hate to sound quippy but don't be sweattin him and his issues. This is a great time for you, you ENJOY it and congrats again on your phenomenal weight loss. Keep it up!!
2006-10-20 15:18:52 · answer #3 · answered by Ade 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Spend some time with him. He knows that you are looking good or getting there and he is afraid that you are going to leave him for someone your own age. Treat him a little special at this time! If he married you while you were over weight than be patience with him. Love on him until you feel like you want to make love. Take it all one day at a time!
2006-10-20 15:20:17 · answer #4 · answered by Child of God 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't like sex anymore?!!! No wonder your husband is insecure. He probably thinks since you lost all the weight that you're now screwing around on him.
Here's a new flash, men have needs. The needs are simple, food and sex. Your husband NEEDS you to find him attractive. If you stop having sex with him, or seem to no longer like sex, it will ruin your marriage.
2006-10-20 15:16:01 · answer #5 · answered by Coz 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋