Why do you do it like this. Has it helped your child attidude to become better.
2006-10-20 06:53:18 · 16 answers · asked by PINK 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Never by spanking and here is why:
Some children remember spanking messages more than nurturing ones. They will remember and be most influenced by the 1 hit than the 100 hugs. Hitting just devalues a child. Children need to predict the outcome in order to behave good in the future. Parents should never spank because using fear and pain is the wrong way to go about it.
Spanking is a form of violence that teaches children that inflicting fear and pain on others is a way to control their behavior. Parents who spank are out of control and are not disciplined parents. It just teaches children how to hit, how to be sneaky, how to fear, how to be ashamed and how to take anger out on others. All degrees of spanking- light, moderate, occasional, rarely, always- give children the wrong kind of attention. You want your child to follow rules because they are right and good, not to avoid punishment because they are scared and become sneaky. When parents spank, they stop their children at the lowest level of moral development. So all the idiots that recommend to spank are eroding their childs ability to be empathetic. When you react with anger to childrens' behavior, we teach them to act without considering another persons' feelings-another consequence we need to avoid. Then when your child doesn't have empathy, it is impossible for them to learn to share, play well with others, avoid angry and violent actions, and take responsibility for their actions. I have children and am studying early childhood development in college. I am against spanking. Children of non-spanking parents tend to be easy to manage and well-behaved because these parents set clear standards for what is expected, provide lots of love and affection, explain things to the child, and recognize and reward good behavior. Non-spanking parents also pay more attention to their children’s behavior, both good and bad, than parents who spank do.
Research shows that the higher the education the person has, the less likely they spank.
2006-10-20 08:07:00 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
The most important thing about disciplining your child is consistency. Set some rules, and the punishments for those rules. Set the punishment before you become angry. And let it be a fair punishement, such as: "If you yell at me like that one more time, you will not get dessert tonight" As soon as the child yells at you like that once again, you ACT QUICKLY and tell that child his/her punishment is going to be enforced. Then be stong and make sure you follow through with what you promised. If your child is young, you may have to spank as a punishement. There is nothing wrong with this. If you dont spank, you may be endangering your childs future welfare. Too many parents are not consistent. They tell the child that they will do something or take a toy away, and then they feel guilty and dont follow through. Think of it this way, if you dont follow through you should feel guilty, b/c then your child knows that he/she can take advantage of you and everyone else they come in contact with in the future. this does not make for a very well rounded person.
2006-10-20 07:06:51 · answer #2 · answered by M 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I spank my children when it is necessary i have 4 sons ages 8,5,4,7 weeks and sometimes the older ones can get outta control at home and in school so depending on the severity of the situation they will get punished or spanked!! i am a single mom raising 4 sons and if I don't discipline and be strict and firm they will run over me and ultimately think its okay to disrespect me and start going upside my head I know in the future as they get older and discover their stregnth they will try to test me but not if I teach them respect first!! I love my children and they make proud and I know that my methods will help them to grow up and be great young men and they will thank me for it so if anybody has a problem with this answer they can kiss my *** cause thats probably why they kids be whoopin they *** and cursing them out all in public you will never see that kinda behavior from my gentlemen!!
2006-10-20 07:13:40 · answer #3 · answered by yousexythangyou 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I try to stay consistent in the discipline. If I spell out the consequences of their actions, I stick to it. If improvement doesn't happen , it gets worse. We have used time-outs a lot. Seems to work pretty well. I have 4 kids, ranging from 11 yr old twin girls to a 3 yr old boy. The twins are the worst. Sometimes they backtalk etc, and time outs and grounding won't work. I have smacked their faces on occasion, not hard, but hard enough to get their attention. It worked. I hate to do it, but there are times when it is needed. It was a lot more common when I was younger. They used to swat in school. Sounds BARBARIC now, but it worked.Overall I think it has worked. We have a great relationship with our kids, and compared to the other kids around and what we hear from teachers, our kids are really well behaved.
2006-10-20 07:32:31 · answer #4 · answered by rock d 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
..discipline ? I am a teacher time outs or missing recess ..at home time outs can be used plus taking away a favorite toy ,activity . TV show ...have a time out chair and keep putting them back until the time is up 5 Min's will do don't ignore the misbehavior a child needs to know what is accepted and what isn't !! never resort to hitting !!
2006-10-20 06:59:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I catch my two year old doing something wrong, he's told "Stop (fill in the blank ) or you will get a time out,,, if he continues he gets a timeout for about 2 minutes (he has a penalty bench he has to sit on - it's kept in the hall away from toys or distractions). When his timeout is over he is told why he had a timeout and he has to apologize. His behavior has improved greatly since we started using timeouts CONSISTANTLY. Good Luck.
2006-10-20 07:08:00 · answer #6 · answered by Tammy P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends. My son gets a swat on the butt if he is doing something dangerous, like trying to run out in the road, and even only at age 2 he knows better than to go out in the road. If he is just being difficult and not listening to me or my husband he gets strapped into his booster chair and put in the corner for a couple of minutes.
2006-10-20 07:02:15 · answer #7 · answered by Ryan's mom 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sometimes my kid acts up when he is tired so I just make him take a nap, or I take a favorite toy/game away or the classic time out. I don't know about other people but he doesn't sit in the corner when I tell him to he fights me so I just give him a squat on the butt and he stays put.
2006-10-20 06:59:30 · answer #8 · answered by Miki 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
FEAR!
put the fear in 'em. You gotta whoop them once for something serious, then all you have to do is threaten them with that for the rest of their lives. But remember, it's gotta be bad enough so they never want to go through it again, but light enough so ya don't get social services called on ya.
hope it helped!
2006-10-20 07:02:30 · answer #9 · answered by surfing_intern 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My hubby and I are 'Old School' When my son gets caught doing something he isn't supposed to do, we count to 3... if he hasn't stopped by the time we get to three he gets put in a time out chair (or he gets a swat, it depends on what he was doing) I has worked great for us. He is only 18mths old and already knows to stop what he is doing if anyone tells him to stop and starts counting (not just me and his dad) Also. Our daughter (6mths) is already starting to pick-up on the fact that when mom and dad start counting, they mean business. She already stops sucking on that thumb (how do I break her of that!!!!!) when we start counting.
Hope this helped.
2006-10-20 06:58:31 · answer #10 · answered by baby_girl_8881 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋