My sister has a six month old baby boy. He is the most adorable child I've ever seen but she just seems really depressed. I know she loves him, and it's not the whole post partum thing. We talked about it last night and it just makes her more upset that she's not happy. She just feels like she looks bad, even though she's thinner than she was before she got pregnant, and she's not making any money to contribute to the baby. Her boyfriend works realy hard and she wishes she could do more. She's here for the weekend visiting me in New York. What can I do to make this a realy fun special trip for her, that will make her feel better about herself?
2006-10-20 05:36:01 · 18 answers · asked by Heather D 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
I just got out of having some spells of being depressed about not working I like to work and I need to work it is part of who I am I need to feel needed but I was out of work for 8 or 9 months and I was so depressed and now I am working again I am fine and I am very happy she just needs to feel needed I would just tell her how important she is to you and to the baby too and how glad you are that she has come to see you and do something fun like you did as kids maybe rent a girl flick and pop so pop corn or have a girls night out get a baby sitter and spend some sister time together or take her to a day spa or to get her hair done that will make her feel better or get a new outfit like a make over!!!!
hope that this helps!!!!
but also if she is like this every year in the winter months it maybe from lack of sunshine so maybe she needs to go to a tanning salon and get some fake sun but it makes you feel the same as being in the sun if you can't go to the beach go to a suntanning booth!!!!
Even when my kids were little I wanted to work but I felt like I should stay home with them and not work so I had a very hard struggle going on in side me ( for years and years till I figured out what I was going to do no matter what any one else thought!!!) what I thought was expected of me and what I wanted did not match up so maybe sit down with her and talk to her mabye she is going tho the same struggle it could be she wants to stay home and she feels she needs to work and make money or vise vesy she could aways try working at home to do both!!!! I did day care at home when my kids were at home then when they went to school I went back to work!!!!!
2006-10-20 06:11:41 · answer #1 · answered by mel416 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She should get some counseling, I went through the same thing when I had my first baby, society teaches us now that we are not succesful if we don't work AND raise a family, but that is bull! Staying home and taking care of your family is the best thing you can do for them! I worked with my first child and we decided with the second to stay home. What a difference for both kids! My oldest is behaving better, doing better in school and has more confidence. They need us there, tell your sister she is doing the right thing, once she realizes that the depression will go away, also she needs a commitment from the father (like marriage) she probably feels like if she doesn't look perfect and act perfect he will leave her. Maybe you should talk to him about this. Good Luck
2006-10-20 05:46:26 · answer #2 · answered by rye252000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even if she loves the baby it still could be a mild case of post partum.Maybe you can get a well trusted friend to watch the baby and the 2 of you can go to a spa.Has she thought about getting a PT job? Maybe she needs time with other adults.New babies can be hard for anyone.Have fun this week-end!!
2006-10-20 05:44:38 · answer #3 · answered by Melissa C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is contributing she is keeping house & looking after his child. I went through those feelings too and my husband told me to quit I am raising his children and keeping the house clean. It finally fixed me good about "Not Contributing" When I finally went to work I quit after a Month when My daughter got bit by a dog at the babysitter's house. I don't have any ideas to make it a special trip for her, but I do know she needs to realize she is contributing. it's a full time job takeing care of her baby and cleaning house & fixing dinner & doing laundry.
2006-10-20 05:43:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
take her to get her nails done. Whenever I am down or not feeling pretty, I go and get a manicure and petticure. Something about haveing pretty nails is nice. Also try getting her hair done or offering to watch the baby while her and her boyfriend go out. Maybe she is missing the time they had before the baby and needs to be reasured he still loves her, she still looks amazing and that she CAN be a good mother.
2006-10-20 06:48:20 · answer #5 · answered by NikkiN 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If at all possible, get someone to watch the baby (if there is a family member there with you or a good friend you can trust) and take your sister out to dinner and let her get away from everything for a few hours. She probably just needs a break.
2006-10-20 05:42:42 · answer #6 · answered by katybeth212001 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go for a walk, babysit the whole weekend , get her a make over,she can go to the library it's free and have a great time with her baby.
2006-10-20 05:45:06 · answer #7 · answered by csaw3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
spending the day at the spa with her might help. Maybe she isn't getting enough support from her husband. I am sure having a baby is a huge adjustment so hopefully once she gets in a schedule it will be easier.
2006-10-20 06:09:21 · answer #8 · answered by stella 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IM NOT A COUNSLER,BUT I DONT WORK,BUT TAKING CARE OF A BABY IS A JOB ITSELF.DR.PHIL SAID ONCE THAT BEING A PARENT IS LIKE HAVING 2 FULL TIME JOBS.TO COMFORT HER AND MAKE HER FEEL BETTER ABOUT HER SELF,TELL HER THAT SHE IS A GOOD MOMMY AND PRETTIER THAN EVER,AND THAT HER CHILD IS LUCKY TO HAVE A MOMMY LIKE HER.AND TO MAKE HER TRIP SPECIAL GET PICTURES TAKIN' WITH YOU,HER AND THE BABY
2006-10-20 05:45:48 · answer #9 · answered by sweet_4_dale 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should do anything that'll let her know you love her... because maybe thats what she needs....affection... not only from her boyfriend but from her family too..... try to cheer her up...since shes yurr sister you should know the things that cheer her up so do them and make sure that the baby is involved to .
teach her how to appreciate life and everyone around her. you can only live life once and you have to make the best out of it. you never know when its going to end.
2006-10-20 05:41:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋