am i really such a girl?

Question

i'm a school girl of 15. i also used to bring very good marks previously(plz dont think i'm swollen headed coz its the truth).but lately, they have gone down. i was always v.good in my science subjects but not so in maths. i used to make so many careless mistakes. but now, the problem is quite different--my marks got a bit down this time coz i couldnt concentrate in my studies this time and got low marks.my mother seems to think i'm just too slow in my studies. she thinks i do 'rote' learning.but actually, i like to go deep into my subjects esp. in physics. i make out difficult questions and things like that.but she thinks i'm just too lil brained. i heard her talking to my uncle wo had comr to solve some o' my probs in civics that 'she is a bit low brained' .i felt v.bad. she scolds me so openly.i'v really started blievin tht i'm like that & that doesnt hlp at all. i'm always being scolded for somethin .slowly i'm gettin v.deppresed & introvrt & sometimes get really angry at myself

Answer 1

Dear, first of all learn to love yourself, think that I am the best what I am today, make target, think of your goals, stop thinking what others are thinking of you,

Answer 2

THen you must be in the 9th grade. My daughter is also in the 9th grade. THere is more expected of a student in high school than in other grades. Your teacher probably won't tell you to study or tell you how to study. You just have to do whatever it takes for you to learn the material Read it. Take notes. Make flash cards and drill yourself with them.

THis really helps: Take a short nap after studying for awhile. THis allows your long-term memory to absorb the information without interruptions so that you can remember it later.

Is your social calendar much more full than when you made better grades? Are you more interested in boys now than then? Maybe you are taking too many hard courses at once. Are you getting enough sleep?

Dapression can cause difficulty concentrating, but the symptoms you list don't necessarily add up to depression. When depressed, a person either has insomnia (can't sleep at night) or hypersomnia (tired all the time, only want to sleep). They also lose intrest in things that they used to enjoy.

Sounds like you live in an environment that uses criticism to force you to be perfect. It doesn't work, does it? Perhaps you can talk to your school counselor. Perhaps he/she will be more encouraging to you.

One last note...If you are even PASSING physics, you are a very bright girl.

Answer 3

Hi clever cat. There are a lot of good suggestions in response to your question. You are not a dummy. Mom seems to be your main problem, and you will not be able to change her. If you get that idea of changing her out of your head and realize that she is not intentionally trying to harm you, it will help. By all means, talk with a school counselor. Mine helped me get motivated to work a little harder an finish in the top 10% of my graduating class. I was still messed up emotionally. I believe with your insight, you may be able to get past the emotional distress you are feeling right now. You may also benefit from psychotherapy.
As far as the difficulty in math is concerned, by any chance did someone keep telling you earlier in life that you, or girls in general, do poorly in math? That is what it sounds like to me, especially if you do well in sciences. Or possibly you have had some problem with abstract thinking, making algebra and other theoretical math problems more difficult for you. Usually that problem is solved as we grow older. You may want to talk with your school counselor about taking a remedial math class. You might be surprised how much easier the 2nd time around.
One more suggestion before I shut up. If possible, do your homework away from distractions, especially those at home. Try the library, or with a friend who is also serious about learning.Often two heads are better than one.

I wish you the best. And please do not give up on yourself. You sound pretty aware and bright to me. Again I apologize for being so long winded.

Answer 4

Sounds like mummy has got a few of her own issues.

Dont beat yourself up over mom not being more mature. Youve got to be the bigger person and keep going. Set yourself some realistic goals and dont let anyone hold you back. People who truly try but dont do so well often feel angry or upset about the outcome and when someone you respect such as your mom say negative things about the situation it adds to the anger. Just because she is mom doesnt make her always right. She is only human. You know deep inside that you can do the work, you just need to stay on it until you fully understand even if you have to consider a tutor. Lots of things can seem difficult when you are learning them but once you understand, it becomes easy.

Answer 5

It's hard enough being 15 without someone you care about saying hurtful things to you. Here in the U.S., we have school counselors to advise students when they have trouble at school and they sometimes will give advice about troubles at home as well. Do you have anyone to talk to at school? It sounds as though it is your mother who has the problem and takes it out on you by constantly scolding and putting you down. You know that you are clever, don't let anyone tell you different. Keep your chin up and remember that your main task right now is your studies, if you work hard you'll get good marks. I did very poorly in school when I was your age because I didn't care about myself. Ten years later, I have returned to college, I am a bio-chemistry major despite not having a knack for maths, and I am getting top grades. You can do anything, but only if you believe in yourself and work hard at it.

Answer 6

No one can be perfect at everything. Find the reason why you can't concentrate on your studies and try to fix it. You are not ill-brained. Have a talk with your Mom and tell her that it really hurts your feelings when she scolds you openly, tell her that you want to do better then ask her for her help, or ask her if she can get you a tutor until your grades go up. I don't scold my children for getting a bad grade, but I do ask them why this is happening, or if they don't understand something and I help them with the subject that is giving them the problem. No one can be perfect or a genius all the time.

Answer 7

well, stuff like careless mistakes do happen in examinations and there is nothing much that we can do about it except to learn from it and try not to repeat it again. to answer your question, No you are not that kind of girl. i do not want to speak badly about your mom but i dont agree with her scolding you so openly. its cool that you really want to go deep into certain subjects but make sure you dont spend too much time on only 1 subject as your grades in your other subject will suffer. try talking to your mom about your problems, say you are in your teenage years, you are still growing and developing, ask her to give you some space and trust and say that you will continue to try to make her proud.

PS: dont get too affected by this as it is only temporary if you really try hard enough to remedy it

i understand your problem because i am right now facing your problem with my results. i still score quite high but i have dropped a lot. the thing is DONT GIVE UP.

lets continue working hard ok? good luck... hope i have helped you. :)

Answer 8

It is very sad that your mother treats you this way. It is called emotional abuse. A good parent would never put their child down this way, instead they would focus on the good and lift your self-esteem. You sound very bright to me. I came from a home where I too at times was made to feel very low. Have faith in yourself even when others dont, because when it comes right down to it YOU are the most important person in your life. Best of luck, if you need to talk feel free to email me by clicking on my avatar. P.S. the reason that your grades are going down could very well be due to your depression issues. Look into it, it happened to me

Answer 9

you're in the height of hormonal changes and the throes of side effects of that. studies have proven that girls in this time are emitting the same brain chemicals, responses and nerve signals as insane people. it IS really hard to concentrate and mistakes and criticism are especially hard to take. your r-ship with your mom is typical to a lot of grlz your age. find your self a friend or mentor (big sisters of america, a woman from church or school) that you can relate to. we've all been through it and actually do understand. talk to her and try to be patient with your mom and especially yourself! this could be a long ride (mine lasted 15 years!!!) armed with this info, you should be ok! keep your head up young miss!

Answer 10

This happened to me too. But now i am back on track. How? Simple. Before i was going back of girls and was always thinking about them. But later i just forgot them and got back to my studies. One important thing is that which i learnt is that you must learn to change your attitude like a computer. when you study always concentrate on it. do not think about anything else. Always have a killer instinct. When you are with your mother you change your attitude to a very caring and loving girl. This makes your mother happy. In the same way deal with other things. This will definitely solve your problem.

Answer 11

print what you just wrote, take it to your mom or uncle.....let her know that it further causes problems when she doesnt seem to be part of your solution.....be polite and remember your manners and respect...having a problem does not allow you to go off the deep end on your mom...placing blame or pointing the finger here is not going to help...pin-pointing the problem to see whats really going on is where you need to be right now...you need your mom a lot right now as you could be having some late puberty issues with your hormones and this needs to be addressed asap...if you cant get help from your mom....go see your counselor at school - thats what they are there for