Are there any guys out there that could be engaged for a long time to a girl, have a wedding in the court, no ring, no white dress, one witness, no wedding gifts, no honeymoon? I think its funny that a lot of guys couldn't handle that. I mean wouldn't you want to save a buck or two and not deal with a girl with a bitchy attitude. I mean come on you just plan the day you want to get married. you get dressed, go to the court or where ever you get married take your vows, sign the papers and thats it. You go to work or you work on the living arrangment, if you are not all ready living together. some people are a little too ritualistic. I think a lot of girls dream about their wedding day, but once they become more educated they see the light and realize its not that big of a deal. I think its also society pressure into making girls think that their day is important. Its ashame when people have these large weddings and then get a divorce. marriage should be more important than a wedding.
2006-10-20 03:51:45 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Definitely not. I think that having a wedding in a church, even if you're not religious, is important.
2006-10-20 03:53:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The marriage is more important than the wedding I agree. And some brides (and grooms even) take it way too far. I had what could be termed a traditional wedding. And I had so much fun. There was no stress, really. No huge to-do about stuff. I picked out flowers I liked and that was it. That settled my colors. No debate, no special instructions. I picked a dress I thought was gorgeous. I chose a couple close friends to be bridesmaids....my husband did the same for groomsmen. I didn't hire a photographer...I asked a family friend to snap a couple money shots and set up a video camera in the balcony. I printed my own invites and hired a friend to make the cake.
I didn't spend tons of money and I had a beautiful day. My husband and I lived together for nearly a year before getting married so after the wedding it was literally life as we knew it.
Mainly we chose to have a wedding for me. Yes, as a little girl I had always dreamed of a wedding. Because I wanted to feel like a princess for just a day. It's kind of shallow, but when you grow up poor and become a just above poor adult, one day to feel beautiful and one day to momentarily forget that the electric bill is due and the gas bill is on cut-off notice and the car needs new brakes is well appreciated and deserved. It was just one day where I felt everything was perfect. I looked and felt gorgeous. I knew the man I loved was waiting for me at the end of the aisle. I knew people were looking at me thinking how happy I look. That was what I wanted out of a big wedding versus a visit to the courtroom.
Of course the entire ordeal was about the first day of our marriage, but a marriage should be a beautiful thing. Might as well make that first day as beautiful as you hope to make your years together.
(Plus the cool gifts were an awesome bonus....and for further proof of life as we knew it...we took a few of the Target gift cards we got, went to a Super Target and bought groceries)
2006-10-20 11:04:31 · answer #2 · answered by bubb1e_gir1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that one excludes the other.... One can have a "dream wedding", and still have a good marriage... I never cared for a big wedding myself, I don't do well being a center of attention, and don't like entertaining a large number of people; a "traditional" wedding would be nothing but stress for me. But I disagree that it necessarly makes sense to treat the "wedding day" mundanely. Lets face it: people LOVE to celebrate. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. If we do away with wedding celebrations - well, then lets do away with Christmas, Thanksgiving, Halloween, Easter, birthdays... you name it. I mean, none of these days have any objective meaning whatsoever. We give our holidays meaning by celebrating them. I can't imagine many people say "The rest of the year should be more important than Christmas; lets not celebrate it." You can lead perfectly meaningful lives, and still observe and rejoice in all the holidays. It includes weddings, as well.
My wedding was informal, fun and totally non-traditional... Everyone had a blast; I would do it again in a heartbeat. Going to the courthouse is practical - but where's the fun in that? Lighten up. There's a middle ground.
2006-10-20 13:45:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My wife and I got married in the court with no honeymoon or anyone present that we knew. The bailiff took a few pictures of us. We went to Dennys afterwords. and that was that. Fast forward 15 years. We are going on our honeymoon next summer on our 15th anniversary. Did not have any money when we got married but now we will take a month and drive across Europe and pay cash for it all. Did not need the fancy wedding and all the glitter. Oh and we are still very happy!!
2006-10-20 11:05:34 · answer #4 · answered by tbear 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A wedding is a chance to celebrate your commitment with the people who love you. How many guests you have or where you have it is totally a personal choice. The possibility of a divorce should definitely not be a consideration when deciding what type of wedding to have! I happen to think my wedding day was incredably important and I am glad my groom didn't "try to save a buck or two" the day we started our new life together.
2006-10-20 11:04:43 · answer #5 · answered by Meems 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, the marriage is more important than the wedding. But if your sole concern is saving money at the expense of pleasing your partner then that doesn't bode well for your marriage. Too many weddings are overblown nightmares in my opinion, but both parties should agree on what's right for them, not just on what numbers the groom wants to see on the invoice.
2006-10-20 11:31:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
And who said romance is dead?!
Whilst I agree that marriage isn't all about the day itself, and I agree that there are better things to spend ones money on, what is wrong with a moderately priced wedding that allows you to share your special day with your family and friends?
We have so little to celebrate in life so why not seize the opportunity to spread some love and happiness for a change?
2006-10-20 10:59:09 · answer #7 · answered by Witchywoo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that everyone has the right to determine what type of day they want/deserve when they get married.
I certainly wouldn't have been happy getting married in a courthouse, I wanted the flowers, the decorations, the food, the pictures, the dress, etc.
It may be society saying that is what we need but when you know what you want, it all falls into place.
2006-10-20 12:43:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
True but as a woman I still want the ring. I don't need a huge wedding, just something small and intimate whether it is in church, the JP, or outdoors somewhere. I just want to marry the one I love and spend the rest of my life with him.
2006-10-20 10:55:38 · answer #9 · answered by Clints_wench 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If that's how she wanted it, I would have no objection, except that I would miss the honeymoon, it's a nice way to celebrate the beginning of the marriage.
I'm not sure who you mean by "girl with a bitchy attitude"... the bride?
2006-10-20 11:14:37 · answer #10 · answered by musiclover 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋