What do you call a Chav in a box?
> >Innit.
> >
> >2. What do you call a Chav in a filing cabinet?
> >Sorted
> >
> >3. What do you call a Chav in a box with a lock on it?
> >Safe.
> >
> >4. What do you call an Eskimo Chav?
> >Innuinnit.
> >
> >5. Why are Chavs like slinkies?
> >They have no real use but it's great to watch one fall down a flight of
> >stairs.
> >
> >6. What do you call a Chavette in a white tracksuit?
> >The bride.
> >
> >7. You're in your car and you see a Chav on a bike, why should you try
> >not to hit him?
> >It might be your bike.
> >
> >8. What's the difference between a Chav and a coconut?
> >One's thick and hairy, the other's a coconut.
> >
> >9. What's the first question at a Chav quiz night?
> >"What you lookin' at?"
> >
> >10. How do you get 100 Chavs into a phone box?
> >Paint three stripes on it.
> >
> >11. Two Chavs in a car without any music. Who's driving?
> >The police
> >
> >12. What do you call a Chav with 9 GCSEs?
> >A liar.
> >
> >13. What do you say to a Chav with a job?
> >Can I have fries with that?
> >
> >14. What do you say to a Chav in a suit?
> >Will the defendant please stand
> >
> >15. Why is 3 chavs going over a cliff in a Nova a shame?
> >A Nova seats 4
> >
> >16. What do you call a 30 year old chavette?
> >Granny.
> >
> >17. What do you call 100 chavs at the bottom of a river?
> >A start.
> >
> >18. Why did the Chav cross the road?
> >To start a
> >fight with a random stranger for no reason whatsoever.
> >
> >19. What do you call a Chav at college?
> >The cleaner.
> >
> >20. Two chavs jump off beachy head, who wins?
> >Society
2006-10-20 02:20:02 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
OMG!!! that was sooooooooo funny!!! lol!! i know about ten people that would appreciate this!! lol!!!! thumbs up to you!!! fantastic!! im still laughing!! im gonna go and copy and paste ur joke to some people now!! hehe!!
2006-10-20 02:28:55 · answer #1 · answered by p_y_t 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
THE CHAV NATIVITY:
There's this bird called Mary, yeah? She's a virgin (wossat then?)
She's not married or nuffink, but she's got this boyfriend, Joe, innit?
He does joinery an' that. Mary lives with him in a crib dahn Nazaref.
One day Mary meets this bloke Gabriel. She's like `Oo ya lookin at?'
Gabriel just goes 'You got one up the duff, you have.' Mary's totally gobsmacked.
She gives it to him large 'Stop dissin' me yeah? I ain't no Kappa-slapper.
I never bin wiv no one!'
So Mary goes and sees her cousin Liz, who's six months gone herself.
Liz is largin' it. She's filled with spirits, Barcardi Breezers an' that.
She's like 'Orright, Mary, I can feel me bay-bee in me tummy and I reckon I'm well blessed. Think of all the extra benefits an' that we are gonna get.'
Mary goes 'Yeah, s'pose you're right'
Mary an' Joe ain't got no money so they have to ponse a donkey, an' go dahn Bethlehem on that. They get to this pub an' Mary wants to stop, yeah?
To have her bay-bee an' that.
But there ain't no room at the inn, innit? So Mary an' Joe break an' enter into this garridge, only it's filled wiv animals. Cahs an' sheep an' that.
Then these three geezers turn up, looking proper bling, wiv crowns on their heads. They're like `Respect, bay-bee Jesus', an' say they're wise men from the East End.
Joe goes: 'If you're so wise, wotchoo doin' wiv this Frankenstein an' myrrh?
Why dincha just bring gold, Adidas and Burberry?' It's all about to kick off when Gabriel turns up again an' sez he's got another message from this Lord geezer.
He's like 'The police is comin an' they're killin all the bay-bees.
You better nash off to Egypt.' Joe goes 'You must be monged if you think
I'm goin' dahn Egypt on a minging donkey'
Gabriel sez 'Suit yerself, pal. But it's your look out if you stay.'
So they go dahn Egypt till they've stopped killin the first-born an' it's safe an' that.
Then Joe and Mary and Jesus go back to Nazaref,
an' Jesus turns water into Stella.
2006-10-23 01:19:03 · answer #2 · answered by claude 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
f***ing hilarious mate. where i'm from every other person on the street is a chav/chavette, these really tickled me and i dare say i'll be telling them to my friends very soon. thanks for the laugh
#5 was the best, i also liked 7/12/15 & 18
=)
2006-10-20 02:29:41 · answer #3 · answered by Miss Tickle 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
tose are ace ive got to remeber them next time i see a chav keep up the good work :)
2006-10-20 10:07:52 · answer #4 · answered by JIM 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cheers, that brought a smile to my face and a good giggle as well on a boring friday afternoon at work. hehehehehe
2006-10-20 02:29:12 · answer #5 · answered by Mas 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Looool! =D Especially like the last 1! U crack me up =]
2006-10-20 04:32:13 · answer #6 · answered by Pink 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Erm , , ,so whats the question?
You seem to haave answered them all?
Lol
Have a great day!
Kim
xxxx
2006-10-20 02:44:51 · answer #7 · answered by Kimxxxx 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
chav jokes? Not a bit of lol !
2006-10-20 02:24:22 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
wow! they are really gd! just had me, my dad and sis in giggles. i love them. hehe my sis is a chav, luckily se cant see what im typing...
2006-10-20 05:42:31 · answer #9 · answered by Jenny 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
LOL - love the last one
2006-10-20 02:22:49 · answer #10 · answered by Trillyp 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋