we agreed that if i wanted i could get a tattoo done on my arm(i have wanted one for years and finally found a desgn i wanted and a tattooist i trusted.My husband made the booking and even paid for the tattoo but the very minute i had it done he went off his head saying how much he hates its and how he can never touch me again knowing i have this "thing" on my arm! I really dont know how to deal with this!!I gave him plenty of opportunites to say he didnt want me to have it done and all i got in reply was "do what you like,it's your body".
i think its a perfect representation of me( its a 2inch celtic knot) but he reckons i have changed and i'm no longer the woman he married.How can someone change their opinion so quickly? is he likely to come round?I need some answers as i dont know what to do nemore(btw we have 2 gorgeous kids but he reckons he may have to leave as he cant look at me).
how can i get through this?
2006-10-20 02:16:00 · 22 answers · asked by ? 2 in Beauty & Style ➔ Skin & Body ➔ Tattoos
update i did not pressure him atall its something we have talked about for ages.he even said he would like one but i know that wont come about .
2006-10-20 02:26:27 · update #1
I feel as though your husband is acting
very immaturely.
The fact that he is making threats to leave you is beyond ridiculoous.
Try speaking to him when he has calmed down.
At the moment, he is just acting irrationally and probaby is saying things he dosn't really mean.
As hard as it is for you right now - give him the space he needs.
Be there for him and act naturally - be just as kind and giving.
He needs time to deal with this.(even though he supported you at the begining).
When he has calmed down, he will see/think clearly and chances are he will see that he HAS over-reacted.
Try letting him know that you are still that lovely woman he fell in love with and thank him dearly for supporting you in the begining.
Tell him how happy he has made you now that you have a tattoo.
Chances are he will get used to it.
I have got used to my husband's tattoos- I don't even see them now - I just see Him and Love him for the person he is.
But, in the meantime, try and not react to his Over-reaction.
Just remain calm and give him the space he needs. He will get over it.
Good luck!
2006-10-20 02:26:03 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK, went through the same thing. My husband said "it was my decision, our daughter and I went together to a CLEAN and very nice tattoo artist. He was with me all the way, until I got home. Told me (it is a Jimmy Buffet parrot, about 2 in on my shoulder) not to expect him to help me clean or take care of it as it was hard for me to get to. He had been in the Navy and never had a tattoo and did not understand my getting one. All of this I had not heard before. I took the time to make sure it stayed healthy and clean. I did not push the subject with him and every so often he caught me admiring it. I still did not bring it up, neither did he. Then one day, about 3 months after my getting it he said "you know I kinda like the parrot." I have had it now about 7 years and we both still enjoy it. Don't make it an arguing point, and don't let him make it one either. Enjoy it, it is now yours for life, I really believe he will come around. People are funny about what they say they can accept and what they are actually capable of accepting. Nothing is good forced. Let him adjust to it naturally and you ENJOY the darn thing, you earned it.
2006-10-20 14:24:20 · answer #2 · answered by ஐAldaஐ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is an idiot! There is absolutely nothing wrong with getting a tattoo on your arm or anywhere else on your body for that matter. It's your body not his! He knows you have wanted to get it for years, you haven't changed. My boyfriend tripped out when I got my first tattoo, but he eventually came around and realized that I am still the same person he fell in love with, and he just had to accept it. I'm sure your husband is not going to leave you over something so small, especially if you have kids. Hope everything works out, good luck.
2006-10-20 02:35:07 · answer #3 · answered by CHERYL 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
CHEATING... Answer me: Is he a advantage cheater? I suppose NOT as though he have been, you might had spotted it earlier than you have got made your moment youngster. WE, all right here, can't realize whether or not he's dishonest on now not. The reality is: he has misplaced sexual urge for food for you. OK... It is an traditional quandary of any marriage, identical to the relaxation of disorders you have got already handed for your great distance in combination. You made FOUR kids, correct? and each different disorders you PASSED TOGETHER, correct? This reality is telling me that you've received a powerful household wherein TWO humans, of their hearts, are WILLING to preserve this fashion TOGETHER. What is the quandary then? ONE on this chain has emerge as WEAK and prone in terms of SEX and COMMUNICATION along with his associate. WHY? That is the query you “ought to holiday your head” however uncover the reply!!! Sexual wish is elaborate to manage, peculiarly whilst it's so visible with regards to guy... whether or not his blood is circulating within the correct recommendations or now not. Can he order “blood, you're OBLIGED to head there on the grounds that I am MARRIED”? NO and he demands your HELP her. And right here, I suppose, you're doing whatever mistaken or stopped doing matters that have been attracting your associate plenty. YOU KNOW it, we don’t! You simply ought to take a seat down and check out to don't forget WHAT and HOW used to be making your conversation traditional and intriguing... You have been riding your husband sexually loopy approximately you, correct? Come to the reflect and evaluate YOU earlier than and YOU at present. What did you do then and what don’t you do now? WHAT precisely your associate is MISSING for bringing “fireplace in his brain” approximately you? FIX IT! Maybe you're simply excellent... BOREDOM? You ought to determine it out. YOU are the STRONGEST one at present and the WEAKEST one demands your support! This is the FIGHT FOR your household, now not in opposition to of it! and four kids desires you to WIN this combat! Good good fortune!... and don’t concentrate “black & white evaluations”, our lifestyles is stuffed with colors and that makes it INTERESTING!
2016-08-31 23:54:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like your husband is pretty controlling and a little childish. Why would you even have to ask him to get a tattoo in the first place? You are a grown woman.... and he agreed to this tattoo so he is being a few words I cant type on here about this... Im not sure what you can really do because he went back on what he said... he is going to have to deal with it
2006-10-20 17:16:42 · answer #5 · answered by Jessica 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to go eff himself. It's your damn body, and if a little tat on your arm means he can't bear to look at you anymore, is he really who you thought he was? If he's that serious about feeling like you've 'changed' (which, by the way, we all do; it's called GROWING) and is thinking about leaving, go to counseling. This is a stuipd thing to let break up a marriage. He might be having problems that go deeper than this and is using your new tat as an excuse.
Congrats on your first tat, by the way! Try not to get too addicted.
2006-10-20 10:45:56 · answer #6 · answered by Steph Gas 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well he's acting very immature about this! It would be wrong for anyone to do something for themselves and get this in the end!?!?!?! wtf? But i would say talk to him when this has calmed down with him and see what is the problem! He might be jealous of you! Seeing that you got it and he thought about it himself! You guys need to communicate more! It was correct for you to ask him about what he thinks and get his approval! Him being your husband your supposed to ask him! Even though your body is yours it kinda is his too! Being your in a partnership his body also is yours too! binded together in Marriage! So he knew you when you didn't have it and he knows you with it! Your not a different person because you have a tattoo now! Thats just very shallow of him to say something like that!
2006-10-20 07:29:00 · answer #7 · answered by Black Betty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry. I think your husband needs some help. He could genuinely feel this way, but it sounds to me that there is something else pissing him off and he is just using the tattoo as an excuse.
Even if he doesn't come around, there is nothing you can do. Good Luck.
2006-10-20 05:39:18 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't talk to him! He's obviously got a problem about nothing. Let him be the one to talk to you. He'll change. When I was with an ex he never wanted me to get a tattoo or other wise he'd leave me. I said too bad it is my body and 7 tattoos later he never left me, I left him!
2006-10-21 14:24:45 · answer #9 · answered by ajmarti82 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems what he thought he could handle he can't. Now it's to late. He needs some time I suppose. Don't beat yourself up. He agreed. If he don't like You because of a tattoo that represents you, well he's got some issues. Best of luck to ya...L.
2006-10-20 02:27:45 · answer #10 · answered by ben and lisa h 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋