you cant make them go away. you MUST give yourself some time to grieve and heal. if you do not then you will be hurting for the rest of your life. If everyone around you tells you to "get over it" tell them to sod off. if you need to talk about it, by all means, TALK ABOUT IT. never hold it in.
things you can do to ease the pain are sharing memories with people who knew your brother or hell, even perfect strangers would do the trick. you might think of something you has not thought of in years.
take advantage of the love and support that your friends and family are offering. they are the warmest wishes anyone could have for you.
if you decide to keep something that reminds you of your brother, make sure its something that will not haunt you. pictures are fine. his CD collection, movies he loved, his pet, favorite hat is cool. keeping clothes and you wearing them for memory sake is a bad idea. you will only be finding yourself crying missing your brother even more.
maybe this is bad advice, maybe not. at least its something to think about other than your sadness.
my deepest condolences to you and your family
2006-10-19 22:35:13
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answer #1
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answered by lil grin 3
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I am so very sorry for your loss. Nothing helps the pain go away. My husband took his life 16 years ago and still I miss him and think about him every day. Each day when you wake up the pain does get easier to bear and one day you will wake up and realise that that awful pain is not there from the moment you open your eyes. Believe me it does get better. Keep all your memories alive in your mind and your heart and concentrate on all the good things you shared. Honestly it does get easier and you learn to live with the loss. Be patient and keep those good memories going.
2006-10-20 01:48:04
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answer #2
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answered by PHILIP C 2
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that pain never goes away. For some it gets a little dull over the years for others the pain is always there. You just have to learn to live with it and figure out how to keep his memory alive within you..
2006-10-20 00:53:20
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answer #3
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answered by bluedanube69 5
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death is a normal part of life,,sometimes when we are old and sometimes before our time,,it just happens,,you have lost your brother and that is awful for you,,you must grieve,,you must acknowledge your anger,your upset,your fear of being without him,,it is a normal part of accepting the passing of a special and much missed loved one,if you bottle it all up inside it will eat at you,,it will sit and fester inside,it will only serve to teach you to keep your emotions inside where others cant reach you. take some time out,,sit and remember who your brother was and still is in memory,,,he was special and deserves to be mourned over,,crying may not be for some as it is easy for others but if the tears are there,,use them,they are the limit to how much emotional pain we personally can accept,,if you want to curl up in a ball in your bedroom,,if you want to ignore everyone around you,,if you want to sleep in your clothes and not bathe for a while,,do it,do it all,this is your grief and you should let it all out,,it will be so much easier to be able to talk about your brother in a good and open way after you have overcome your sadness,,you can remember the stupid things he did and smile,,tell one of his crap jokes and laugh at how bad he was at telling them,,if you need professional help to help with your grief,see someone,they are good and they will help you allow yourself to let all the feelings out,,you will see the light at the end of the tunnel but for that you have to be looking forward ,if you are always looking back you wont see anything but the past when it keeps bumping into you.
2006-10-19 22:30:54
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answer #4
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answered by lex 5
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Gradually it will go away by just living your life the best you can.Try going out more and getting your mind off of things. I am trying to help a friend cause he rmother died and I am lost. It will be ok day by day though and through time. You will always miss him, but it will hurt less and less. I hope that you get through this it is awful losing someone. Take care.
2006-10-19 22:19:56
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answer #5
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answered by Ebony 2
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To a undeniable quantity the discomfort of the loss will continually be with you, yet over the years this is going to become much less extreme and all-eating. there'll nevertheless be tough days while it feels uncooked or while something triggers your emotions to sense as you probably did while your love one died, yet different days you will bypass by way of without somewhat thinking plenty with regard to the guy. Time is a great healer yet you in addition to mght could desire to permit your self to sense the uncooked and painful emotion it somewhat is grief.
2016-12-08 17:53:21
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answer #6
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answered by mcdonnell 4
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i have lost many, and I have learned to deal with it , as everything in this worls has an ending. I think about how beautiful they were, and the good that they brought to our lives, This may sound a bit strange, But i have learned to comapre it to a beautiful flower.
When you plant a flower, and watch for the stem to grow out from the ground, oh the joy it brings, when it breaks earth. For many days and weeks to follow, you watch it grow, and bring life to itself, When it breaths it's first air with it's beautiful pedals, your heart beats fast, for something that has brought joy to you everyday, is becoming what it is meant to be. Something that is beautiful, full of life, pure, innocent, and beautiful. Then it starts to fade, the leave wither, the stem weakens, and then it's gone. I pick the stem before it has a chance to wither away in my yard. I want to remember the beauty and joy it has given me. I know it is gone, but the feelings that I had, when it bloomed in my eyes,will never pass away.
My Dear uncle told me, before he passed away, is that.
"Each and everyone of us is here for a reason unknown , but we are here, and if we can bring joy and laughter to everyone around us, before we leave this earth, there not need, be a reason.
2006-10-19 23:45:54
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answer #7
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answered by Anonymous
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Sorry to hear that....but don't be afraid to grieve, and if you have any good memories of your brother hold onto those....it is always hard to loose someone close, but time heals all wounds, you will never forget, but it will get easier with time.....it's a road we all have to travel some day. But i wish you all the luck, and God bless.
2006-10-19 23:18:12
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answer #8
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answered by Anonymous
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u cant make d pain go away but sometimes only time can heal it
2006-10-19 22:19:52
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answer #9
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answered by Anonymous
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Think about he was a very nice man, and now his soul in heaven in God's hands
2006-10-19 22:35:21
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answer #10
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answered by Neighbour 5
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